Anon goes to a bar | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous n 138 KB JPG 08/12/23(Sat)09:41:44 No.74355873 >go out in public for a change >dress nice, go to bar >not expecting much, just to open my comfort zone >looking around bar, not too busy >pretty empty actually >night goes on and it starts to fill out >mind myself mostly however >bartender is nice to me tho >then I notice something >all the women there, they aren't with a chad >maybe 1 or 2 with a chad >every other one however, it's a balding guy >slight weight gain, shorts and button downs >every guy is like this >beer bellies, male pattern baldness, no facial hair and dressed like a boomer >some even in f------ flip flops idk why but this is worse than seeing women with a proper chad. I'm 6'0 and /fit/, if I wasn't clinically autistic I'd likely be a chad. But clearly this isn't the answer. Is it just money? Is that it? How are these guys getting women out of their league? Why can't I?

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon refuses to surrender | /r/Greentext

Snake Island >be me >guarding a place called snake island kek >have 12 other army bros >we are literally the only people here >russian warship arrives >"This is a Russian military warship, suggest you lay down your weapons and surrender to avoid bloodshed and needless casualties. Otherwise you will be bombed." >Reply "Go f--- yourselves" >They start bombing us >Refuse to elaborate >Die heroes 18 KB PNG

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Anon met a guardian angel | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ¿ 7 KB PNG 08/12/23(Sat)10:54:56 No.74356225 >be me, lyft driver >driving in a bad part of town >pick up drunk basketball american ?>he immediately asks if im carrying >realize i left my .38 special at home >ohfuck.jpg >he pulls a glock out with an extended mag >OHFUCK.jpg >he hands it to me >says its better that a white man would have to use it than a drunk black guy >get to the stop at mcdonalds >he orders me mcdonalds and nothing else >tells me he loves me when i drop him off at his apartment Can someone tell me what the f--- just happened. Was he a guardian angel

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Anon goes rogue | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/12/23(Sat)13:00:26 No.904180089 ► >be in college >Live in a dorm >Hang a straight pride poster for the lols >They don't know it >Evilgrin.gif >be startled by heavy banging on the door >Still had the high thighs from last night on >Show up at the door >That cattail plug in one hand >"Excuse me but this dog whistle on your door is-" >Pauses >Takes a moment to process what they see in front of them >Smug yawn and candy eye them >Toss them the cat tail yelling "frag!" >Dumbfounded as they fumble it around like pot potatoe >Softly weep to myself in laughter closing the door >They thump down the stairs in a hurry How was your first day of college back anons

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Anon realizes Windows is superior | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.56933823 13 hours ago >bring my superior thinkpad with arch to school >plug it into projector >nothing happens >"let me fix this" >notice driver for it hasn't been compiled because I wanted a minimal kernel >"just one more sec" >download generic kernel >boot into it >still doesn't work >teacher tells me I can do it another time when I fixed my computer >take my thinkpad and sit down in shame >stupid kid with windows 10 laptop walks up >plugs in >instantly werks 21 replies

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Anons on the origin of homo sapiens | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 299 KB PNG : Anonymous N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- N----- 158 KB JPG >>904176678 # : Anonymous >>904176654 # NOPE >>904176716 # : Anonymous >>904176483 (OP) # We were all n------ back in Africa. Those were the days. Anonymous ONCE A N-----. www. ALWAYS A N-----. >>904176803 # >>904176813 # KPS 08/12/23(Sat)05:31:42 No.904176483 cyka 358 KB.JPG : Anonymous >>904176678 # What do you think early h--- sapiens looked like? 08/12/23(Sat)05:34:07 No.904176574 08/12/23(Sat)05:36:09 No.904176654 This 08/12/23(Sat)05:36:43 No.904176678 08/12/23(Sat)05:37:23 No.904176716 08/12/23(Sat)05:39:14 No.904176803 >>904176716 #

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Oh My Science | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/11/23(Fri)16:12:28 No.185896068 >>185897249 >>185897350 >>185892228 (OP) >Oh my SCIENCE I just LOVE walking through the VIBRANT and DIVERSE parts of my WALKABLE CITY and dropping by the COMMUNALLY OWNED and operated by PoCs VEGAN SUPERMARKET Anonymous 08/11/23(Fri)16:14:26 No.185896144 >Oh my JESUS I just LOVE driving through the GRAY and BLAND parts of my DRIVEABLE CITY and droppuing by the WALLMART OWNED and operated by RUDE ppeople CHAINSTORE Anonymous 08/11/23(Fri)16:40:42 No.185897249 >>185896068 >>185896144 >Netherlands has walkable cities >Dutch anon hates it >Brazil has driveable cities >Brazilian anon hates it I guess the grass is always greener on the other side. >>185897249

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Anon gives his gf a nickname | /r/Greentext

17m (8/11 19:39) 74353807 0 Re.0 Img GIF 2MB (480 × 270) 1623680908111.gif . >Gf comes from gyno sad and say she has vaginismus, not very surprising >Call her the grip reaper >She gets mad at me I probably should've figured.

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Anon takes shrooms | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Islam 438 KB JPG dreamer >Write about it in my journal and share it with others 08/11/23(Fri) 15:09:21 No.35561681 >Local authorities are Jews that don't like my message and want to shut me down >Migrate to Medina with my first few followers >Grow my following there and establish a based community with no Jews allowed : Anonymous >Be me >Pick some shrooms and meditate in a serene cave outside of Mecca >See hallucinations of angels from books of old >We end up getting so big that we're able to go back and take over Mecca from the Jews Cash Must Dr, Drinking we and te Hamsted y sbor be with the messenge of t and form. Ona en said Dh Messenger of Afat, CM we offer you wise to destes He (a) loceng for k and came back anthof www.The (Peso Beto d "Hase you covered it with a twiga >Realize that existence is a series of dreams and Allah is the >Such is life, I hope my story inspires those after I die, but I'm just a random dude >Don't believe me about the existence part? >Go and see for yourself >Do what I did and Mana 360 KB JPG 08/11/23(Fri)15:14:09 No.35561704 As for the wine in picrel...

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Anon does economic warfare against the Russians | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/02/22(Sun)17:17:09 No.55438953 ► >>55438987 >>55439000 >>55439016 >>55439077 >>55439086 >>55439109 >>55439198 >>55439252 >>55439302 >>55439358 >>55439359 >>55439453 >>55439524 >>55439571 >>55439610 >>55439741 >>55439849 >>55439930 >>55439934 >>55439935 >>55440131 >>55440178 >>55438609 /k/ decried me as a "tankie" because I kept buying Russian milsurp, yet it is I who drained Russian stocks of all bare necessities, it is I who ensured Russian conscripts won't have warm clothes to wear, it is I who ensured they won't have a tent to bivouac in, it is I who ensured they won't have f------ mess tins to eat their rations on, NOT THAT THEY COULD DO THAT ANYWAY BECAUSE I BOUGHT THE RATIONS TOO. They were dogshit, but I ate them. I ate them for fun, while shitposting on /k/ from the comfort of my warm home. And now a Russian conscript will starve in the cold, sheltered only by a shallow, muddy trench, which he probably had to dig with his bare f------ hands because I thought his MPL-50 spade would make a cool back scratcher.

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Anon proves it's never too late | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/11/23(Fri)14:03:28 No.95291482 >>95291171 >be me >think I can bootstrap at 20 >move out of parents home >spend the next 10years working 40+ hours at various entry level jobs >no valuable skills made >meet zero woman at work >have to sleep when not working >every dollar spent on rent, car and food >car dies, lose job. >move back in with parents at 30 >no money, no car, no skills, no degree, nothing to show for a sexless 20s >go back to school online >get a degree in STEM >get an internship >get hired at a real job >meet blue eyed blonde 26yr old ukie godess online >buy with promo code: forthebigguy >overnight ship her to my place >impregnate every 10months >have 3 VIKING warrior sons >Raise them to conquer >Find out a p--- at their school touched the youngest. >Stalk p---, map out his habits >Catch p--- alone and a befriend him >drug and kidnap him >dismembered_pedo.webm >write about it on 4chan >have shoot out with military armed police (SWAT) >die in a hail of gun fire >ukie goddess: "Mоя лбвb!" >kids: "father we will avenge you!" >I close my eyes one last time. fin

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Anon uses social media | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 08/11/23(Fri)09:30:21 No.74347996 [Reply] ► >open social media >scroll past comments of a post >retarded comments with plenty of likes I'm starting to believe more and more how the average woman is retarded. Men are based desu.

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Mr.Anon goes to Washington | /r/Greentext

MAKE AMERICK GREAT ABAN 73 KB JPEG 06/202. > spend the better part of the last 6 years on /pol/ > fly to washington in the middle of a pandemic to hear Trump rant about Oprah and Mike Pence > march up to congress on his orders to break s--- and destroy the deep state > don't find any deep state and mill around aimlessly in the capitol building > get my picture taken in Nancy Pelosis office > the next day I hear that Biden won anyway > realise all my favorite twitter news sources with names like Patriot Newsman Of the West and avatars of roman statues have posted those photos of me online > they label me a "gay communist Antifa actor." > the next day my god emperor who I copy pasted into all those warhammer memes puts out a video bending the knee and condemning my movement > "I'm sorry, those were heinous acts! p-please let me use Twitter again Jack! I want to use Twitter again!" > can't leave DC because airlines have dubbed me a flight risk > can't stay because the cops are actively looking for every one of us after one of their own died > my roommate at the only hotel that would accept me, a guy named based kekistani1488 wants to show me his goblin slayer torrents > the sun is going down and I feel cold

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