Coomer's curse | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 58 KB JPG 08/03/23(Thu)12:06:52 No.74255428 >be me >arabic >discover p--- at 12 >masturbate on and off for a week >find out m----------- is a sin >get worried allah will punish me >dad dies in a suicide bombing 3 days later >decide im never jerking off again >ff 7 years >become an atheist >decide dads death was a coincidence >j------- one day >brother gets hit by a bus next day >paralyzed from the waist down Is it my fault, bros??? 08/03/23(Thu)12:09:34 No.74255444 : Anonymous >>74255428 (OP) # yes. its a bit too much of a coincidence dont you think? well done f------ up your bro

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon takes the elevator | /r/Greentext

Anonymous This is the year, guys. No more feels. We're all getting gfs in 2015 2016 20172949 What's the most brutal thing you've ever experienced? Something that made you realize it's truly over. 2022 08/01/23(Tue)21:54:54 No.74243032 I'll start: >tfw I'm in an elevator, minding my own business >some kid (foid) looks dead in my face says out loud that they don't like me and wants to hit me >parents rebuke the kid while everyone else stays silent in second-hand embarrassment >kid just keeps staring at me while still proclaiming her disdain for me 318 KB PNG S--- happened years ago but I still remember it like yesterday.

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Anon is a white boy | /r/Greentext

email.png (24 KB, 353x147) google yandex iqdb wait Carolina peak agp Anonymous 08/02/23(Wed)19:27:06 No.74252373 [10] [Reply] >>74252402 >use add-on to change my name to a female name on screen >now people refer to me as a girl. >j------- to this. Anonymous 08/02/23 (Wed)19:30:27 No.74252402 ✓ >>74252373 (OP) white boys everyone

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Anon hates reddit | /r/Greentext

We squint at the Sun, because it's bright. We squint at people, because they aren't. I f------ hate reddit Anonymous 08/02/23(Wed)23:05:57 No.903701954 >be me >post in r/japan asking about sakura in May >post gets removed by the automod because it thinks it's asking for travel advice, which is not allowed >adjust the post so it fits the rules of the sub itworks.jpg >moderator swoops in and bans me for circumventing the rules >I message the mods asking to be unbanned >They tell me to gtfo with the b------- s-- story (it wasn't a s-- story) >before the ban, I adjusted my post to fit the rules >mfw I got banned for following the rules >told the mod to go f--- himself >I f------ hate reddit

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Second anon is speaking the truth! | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Ban Al girlfriends Experts Say Al Girlfriend Apps Are Training Men to Be Even Worse Creating a perfect partner that you control and meet your every need is really frightering 820 KB PNG 07/27/23(Thu)07:45:29 No.74170689 >>74170813 # https://futurism.com/experts-ai-gir Ifriend-apps-men Experts say that Al girlfriends are dangerous, frightening and making men more misogynistic. Al gfs should be banned by the government. : Anonymous >>74170689 (OP) # why ban my only hope for happiness and true love. ban real women for rejecting me. 07/27/23(Thu)07:50:54 No.74170742

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Femanon meets a redditor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Daddy >i download plebbit to shitpost >mention in a comment somewhere that i'm a girl >wake up next day to a DM request from a guy literally begging me to send him videos of me pissing myself >all his posts are about drinking piss >respond with "ew weirdo" >get reported for harassment 76 KB JPG 07/26/23(Wed)21:55:28 No.74172635 >be me >femanon + neet + khv wombo combo >banned within 24 hrs tale as old as time

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Anon has a cool dad | /r/Greentext

>be me >about 12 or 13 >my dad bought me a ps2 >my dad would take me every other week to buy a new game >played a lot of cool games >we played this game called Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance 46 KB JPG >it had a co-op mode so we'd play it together a lot >I'd always pick the human and he'd be the dwarf >we almost 100% it and even unlocked the secret 4th character Thanks dad

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Anon must pretend | /r/Greentext

> Be me > Absolute f------ loser > Go to gas station to get le slurpee one day > Notice cashier and his friend are laughing at me > Decide to f--- with them > Pick up pack of trojans and slap them on the counter with my drink > Their faces >Walk out feeling smug > Realize now I have to always be chad infront of them > Throw condoms in the trash outside I waste so much more money just to get my slurpees now because I always have to pick up condoms each time i go in there

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Anon witnesses horrible events going on | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 92 KB PNG 08/02/23(Wed)09:29:45 No.74248424 >pretty sure I witnessed a r--- last night >feel sick and barely slept >was bored at 1am and decided to go on a night walk >go to my local park where I normally go for night walks >big park with a path where you can walk a full circle and end at the gates you came in at >walking for about 20 minutes with my headphones on >suddenly hear a muffled voice among the loud music in my ear >take my headphones off >a woman's voice coming from the bushes to my left >i see her head and arms laying against the ground poking out of the bushes about 20 feet away >she begins screaming "HELP ME, HELP PLEASE" >I freeze up and my heart is racing >she keeps screaming and making noises at me >a man's voice says "get the f--- out of here" >turn around and run for my life without looking back I don't know what to do, should I make a police report? I haven't stopped shaking and even threw up

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Movie recomendations? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/01/23(Mon)14:36:31 No.183983542 Retard plant houseplant-twitter-thumb-700xauto- 233097_edit_711425076220609.jpg 148 KB JPG It is very hard for me to express how much I hate weed smokers. It is unreal how these worthless losers trigger me. Every single person I ever met in 27 years that smokes weed was a absolute retarded p------------ annoying cocksucker m------------ rat. Is there any movie that focuses on a junkie or especially weed f----- smoker that has a happy ending like them dying in extreme pain and suffering?

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Someone is watching their back. | /r/Greentext

>school is in low-income, high- crime neighborhood >one of my kids often gets picked up by his grandpa >grandpa is an OG who used to be a gangbanger in the 80s, spent some time in prison, and got his s--- together >he's big and scary-looking, but super f------ nice >leave the school after working late one day, some dudes walk up to me and ask what time it is >look down at my watch and one of them sucker punches me >try to fight back but it's 3-on-1 >get my watch, phone, and wallet taken >next day during dismissal >students grandpa notices bruises, asks what the hell happened >oh I got jumped by some guys on my way home >he asks what they looked like >don't know but I remember they drove away in a white Camaro 1.19 MB JPG >he nods and says okay >about a week later, student comes back and hands me a plastic bag from his backpack >inside is my phone, wallet, and watch >see a news report a few months later about a white Camaro found at the bottom of a nearby lake

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Anon's childhood trauma | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 3.15 MB JPG : Anonymous → 07/31/23(Mon)22:32:45 No.185434035 Tell me your childhood trauma 07/31/23(Mon)22:39:33 No.185434371 >>185434035 (OP) # i never had a actual best friend, always been the second choice. God i remember how 374 KB JPG traumatizing break between class were since i had no one to hang out with. Funny how things still the same now, i have a few friends but i still the second choice, they will only come to me if they have nobody else 249 KB PNG >>185434659 # >>185443318 # >>185460430 # >>185468154 # : Anonymous 08/01/23(Tue)08:26:14 No. 185454589 >Mom got the normal Weet-Bix and not Weet-Bix crunch

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Anon is still in pain of his bad days with his mom | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri)22:29:45 No.773601407 >Mom comes home from work stressed out as usual, dad home drunk >Sees me depressed and unmotivated to do anything > takes me and my sister out to eat >let me order anything from the menu, as the good boy I am I order tendies with hunny mussy >we leave and go visit my uncle and my newborn cousin 46 KB PNG >on our ride back home we listen to Southern Nights, a song I love >mfw I realized she did this all for me to cheer up >came home and didn't want to cry and say "i love you" cause I'm a wuss > grow a pair of balls and go say "I love you and thanks for taking me out " sobbing all over her shoulder >still crying while writing this > although you'll never see this > Thank you mom, I love you with all my heart

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