Anon bets on himself | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 9 KB JPG 07/20/23(Thu)22:23:27 No.902964407 >turn 20 >bumbling lonely awkward doofus >decide to turn my life around >spend the next decade trying to be better >turn 30 today >spending the day alone in my apartment, not a single text or call >still a bumbling lonely awkward doofus >only one add-on in the decade >clinically diagnosed depression what are the odds I'll make it to 40? I want to put some money in depending on the odds

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon meets the Father of the Year | /r/Greentext

03/28/22(Mon)21:06:15 No.875251778 Anonymous >>875248608 (OP) # >Be me >Tiny twink/femboy >On Grindr trying to find kinky sex because mentally ill >Meet guy who wants to try ddlb >I'm 50/50 but I'll meet for coffee >He comes with his kid, very weird but ex wife comes after like 10 mins and whisks him away >Figure it's none of my business, people got their s--- >Guy seems cool, older than me but fit enough >Go back to his >He wants me to wear some cute PJ's he has, tags still on so I knew they were new, they fit okay, shorts a lil loose >Mostly do cute s---, he cuddles me and patronises me it's actually super comforting >Nearly falling asleep on him I'm so at ease >Beginning to get into this rp >Tells me he has adult diapers and asks if I would put one on >Begin to feel genuinely sorry for this guy. He doesn't seem interested in sex he just wants affection >Decide to roll with it, never done it before and I'm always game to try most stuff once >He makes me feel super at ease >It's pretty comfy >I'm curled up on his chest and we're watching s--- on YouTube on his phone >Actually considering dating this guy even though he's got some weird fetish >He starts to get a bit handsy >I get excited >Some passionate kissing >Then I guess all the red flags hit me like a f------ tank when out of nowhere he asks "can I call you [blank] it's my son's name" >Realise at the speed of light he's trying to surrogate f--- his 5yo son using me >I freak, throw my clothes on over what I'm wearing and yeet myself out the door, delete Grindr >Go home and shower and dump the stuff he gave me in the trash I will never trust another freak on Grindr again. Ruined any kind of ageplay for me now.

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anon is an imperialist nazi brainwashed by American propaganda | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: TeyU5+V3 ) | 07/20/23(Thu)17:28:32 No.435181043 >be [insert any Western power] >colonize lots of nations in the 17 and 1800s >give independence to all of them by the 1990s >be Russia >colonize lots of nations in the 17 and 1800s >refuse to recognize the independence of any of them >unironically criticize the "imperialism" of the West on a daily basis

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BARKBARKBARKBARKBARK | /r/Greentext

File: barkbark.jpg (9 KB, 275x183) BARK BARK 07/20/23(Thu)18:00:01 No.902950499 ► >>902950735 BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK >> BARK 07/20/23(Thu) 18:02:13 No.902950582 ► File: images (7).jpg (7 KB, 275x183) BARK 07/20/23(Thu)18:03:14 No.902950624 ► File: images BRAK.jpg (6 KB, 341x148) BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK >> BARK 07/20/23(Thu)18:05:02 No.902950702 ► File: png-clipart-dog-bite-grap(...).png (81 KB, 900x720) 210 BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK 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BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK >> Anonymous 07/20/23(Thu)18:05:48 No.902950735 ► File: 8bfd3c86dd3d8a8af2ebfba94(...).jpg (9 KB, 235x238) >>902950499 (OP) NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM 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Anon becomes a history buff | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/17/22(Thu)00:51:29 No.12878558 382 KB JPG Chinese history be like >Chao ling takes power >247 million perish European history be like >Count Baron Kaiser Werner Pfeldlinger Fingerlickner von Hoeltschweinergmachtner marries half sister Znigwieczrina Nowloczynlieczwowzcrczsky of Globsnogczrecnoyarskglograd triggering a war between King Juan Jose Maria Rigoberto Aguascacas de Santo Domingo de los Diabetico and Pierre Richelesaux pretard je logriouxoueuraxeux establishing the Grand Duchy of Neue Ooksteinberg a tax haven with a population of 16

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Anons dad is homophobic | /r/Greentext

File: 1363302801416 gif-(172 KB, 300x165, 1323187660090.gif) Anonymous 03/14/13(Thu) 19:13 No.11884997 Replies: >>11885 I'm gay. My dad is not pleased with this fact. Completely homophobic. Half the time his homophobia doesn't even make sense. >Fishing show on TV in the living room >Watching it with mom and dad >Mom: "I don't have the patience for that kind of stuff >Me: "It doesn't feel like too long when you're out there" >Dad: "Time flies when you're a f-----." >Go to my room

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/r9k/ discusses Batman’s enemies | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/19/23(Wed)16:20:10 No.74088504 : Anonymous >>74088504 (OP) # >catwoman (cats) IMG_2159.jpg 472 KB JPG how old were you when you realized all of batman's villains were modeled after the bat's natural predators? 07/19/23(Wed)16:22:46 No.74088526 >killer croc (crocodiles) >penguin (penguins) >deadshot (assassins) >man-bat (other bats) ah, yes Anonymous >>74088504 (OP) # the bat's worst enemy, the riddle 07/19/23(Wed)16:24:24 No.74088544

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Bark Bark Bark | /r/Greentext

: BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK 9 KB JPG : BARK 07/20/23(Thu)17:00:01 No.902950499 7 KB JPG 07/20/23(Thu)17:02:13 No.902950582 BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

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Being out in nature is healthy | /r/Greentext

1 File: преузимaе (13).jpg (6 KB, 225x225) Anonymous 07/20/23(Thu)12:59:37 No.74096849 [Reply] >>74096862 >>74096981 >be me >19, studying computer sciences >feel like s---, not really suicidal but wouldn't mind it if I died either >win a free hotel stay at a national park >I'm not really a fan of the outdoors, but its free so whatever >spend a week just hiking various trails and sightseeing >my fatass barely survives and is exhausted, still feel awesome >feel genuinely happy for the first time in ages (pic related, a pic I took at a viewpoint) >go back home >immediatly feel like s--- again >somehow feel even worse than I used to >I keep thinking about going back but I'm broke as f--- I got a taste of heaven and then got put back into hell. I genuinely don't know how to cope Anonymous 07/20/23(Thu)13:01:03 No.74096862 >>74096849 (OP) F--- I just realised I put in the wrong file, my pics are too big to post or whatever Anonymous 07/20/23(Thu)13:14:46 No.74096981 >>74096849 (OP) Happens to me as well. But I go on runs instead. Honestly anon nothing helps.

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Anon has regrets | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/20/23(Thu)14:16:19 No.74099224 This is what a CUCK looks like. CUCK.jpg 99 KB JPG >be me >cuck fetish >ask gf to f--- a man in front of me >as soon as he slides his d--- in, I regret it >break down crying and ask them to stop >man leaves embarrassed Is there any way for me to regain my gfs respect? This was undoubtedly the most embarrassing moment of my life, and I don't know if she will see me as a man

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Why don’t you have a seat here Anon? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ITAAND 94 KB JPG 07/20/23(Thu)13:40:30 No.902941029 >23yo me fall in love with a 20yo cutie >it ends 5 years later >sad for a year >decide to get back into dating, find life and be how I used to be >decide to go back to where I met my ex where college girls hang >start chatting with a college chick and she's friendly too >make moves >"are you hitting on me anon hehe how old are you?" >*sudden realization that she's probably 10 years younger and I'm an old f--- flirting with college girls who are too young for me* >*panicking internally fuckshitfuckshit* >however old you want me to be femanon hehe >"hehe ok well I have to go to class bye" where did the time go /b/ when did I become an old creep

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we have a mission | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/20/23(Thu)20:54:41 No.902934132 [Reply]► >>902934191 /b/ros, reddit has start r/place again. there are flags everywhere, including the ukrainian flag which is expanding sideways. lets unite as retards and build a massive russian flag that will challenge the ukrainian flag 244, -144 already has a red blob, we can use that as the red part of the flag. as we grow sideways we can fight the ukrainian flag reddit r/place russia flag

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Anon discovers cool trick | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 54 KB JPG 3 Replies 07/20/23(Thu)12:40:30 No.74097222 pro tip: if you respond to questions with "don't worry about it" you'll seem cool and intimidating Anonymous >>74097222 (OP) # >"Do you think my ass looks big?" >"Don't worry about it." Anonymous >>74097222 (OP) # >How old are you? >Don't worry about it. View Thread 07/20/23(Thu)12:43:20 No.74097255 07/20/23(Thu)12:57:45 No.74097392 : Anonymous >>74097222 (OP) # >Did you s--- your pants? >Don't worry about it. 07/20/23(Thu)12:58:32 No.74097402

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