Anon is a cat lover.,..... | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

570 KB JPG glass >be me, 17f and in treatmen and recovery from r--- >walking through petco to pick up crickets for my friends pet lizard >lock eyes with this cat in the adoption area >she presses her paw up to the >cryinginpublic.jpg >l impulsively adopt her >two months later, sucidal thoughts almost nonexistent and able to talk to strangers again >cat is my best friend, she never leaves my side when I'm home and encourages me to get out of bed in the morning Don't forget to give your pet a hug today

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon goes to extreme length | /r/Greentext

45 KB JPG >THAT >F------ >W---- >wake up at 3PM (earliest in years) >mommy is at her job at a construction site >look at my Toy Story nightstand expecting there to be a hot plate of tendies >there isnt >use my tard adrenaline to roll out of bed >roll to the cabinet and grab grammys ashes >dump them into one of my full semen jugs >chug all of it >send the video of me doing it to bitch mommy >thatll teach that bitch >turn on news 2 hours later after blowing grammys dusty shitflakes out of my ass >something about a woman committing suicide by jumping off a construction crane where mommy works >women will do anything to get attention. Mommy should be home any minute to apologize for forgetting my morning tendies.

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Im happy for anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous ITT: Benefits of lifting as a (...) 11/11/21(Thu)23:21:03 No.64323169 FROG GAME >recently asked out a cute waitress LOOK AT THE FROG out who I've talked to before and who I thought we had a good thing going >tells me she has a bf but that we can still be friends >tell her no worries, her bf is a YOU WON!! 62 KB JPG lucky guy >instead of feeling defeated I use that "sad" energy to lift heavier weights at the gym >despite this being the 50th girl to reject me in my life I don't let the rejections get me down like they used to I guess I'm more mature than before but you never get used to rejections, they still hurt just not as much as before.

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anon didn’t actually watch the movie | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 7 KB JPG 06/13/23(Tue)17:12:18 No.58560167 How the f--- could Ryan blow up a Panther tank with just a revolver? And this gets touted as a realistic depiction of war, that vets wept at the theaters seeing it. 19 Replies / 4 Images View Thread

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Anon has a problem in vegas | /r/Greentext

7 KB JPG >be me >get really into poker >get cocky >go to Vegas >think I'm going to win a fuckton >bet all of my money >I lose >ohfuck.jpg >can't pay for trip back to home state >am currently in a Denny's >what do anons

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Anon Has No Friends | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/13/23 (Tue)13:15:05 No.73663195 444 KB PNG >be me >no friends >friend from school who cut me off for some reason messages me, asking to send some memes >i send them >he says they're cringe, that i'm retarded and should kill myself. >he then blocks me Shouldn't have made any friends at school man

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Will anon figure the mystery out? | /r/Greentext

>Be Me >Married dead bedroom >Suspicious of wife >Very secretive all of a sudden >Fapping at my computer one night >Notice stains on carpet beside sofa >Investigate and stains also on sofa >Looks like dried in j--- >Flashback's of when she use to blow me in that very spot >Clean it up and say nothing to my wife >Week later similar stains appear 37 KB JPG >Again I clean it up >Again it reappears every week or two >Always after days I'm in office >Start checking laundry >Find similar stains on one of her tops buried at the bottom of basket >She obviously cheating >Already called lawyer about divorce >Gathering evidence now so she doesn't flip this and try keep the house >Camera set up >I'm in office today >Let's catch this bitch

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Anon's schoolmates innovate bullying with AI | /r/Greentext

How f----- am I right now? >be me >high schooler. it's absolutely brutal right now >whole school hates me because I'm always talking about how gender and sex are two different things, saying there are only 2 sexes >"anon loves talking about sex, but does he know his mom has an OnlyFans?" >my mom didn't have an OnlyFans, she is fat and 52 years old >one of the kids took a photo of my mom, made Al generated nudes of her, and put them on OnlyFans to get a screenshot >he sent it to the entire school, everyone making fun of me >I told my mom about it and she decided that she would start an OnlyFans because "I look better than those photos anon" >lots of people started paying her on OF, she plays up being a granny and plays with her belly fat in videos 1.62 MB PNG >my teacher has her nudes. He told me he will only delete them if I graduate >my GPA is a 2.3 >my mom quit her job and is doing OnlyFans full time now, making double what she was as an office assistant What can I do to convince my teacher to delete the photos?

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Anon opens up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous hey mom you were right I'm not based I'm mentally ill 133 KB JPG 06/13/23(Tue)12:41:56 No.73662305 >Be quiet and keep to myself >People want me to speak, they make jokes about me being quiet >Speak, tell jokes, share my opinion >People dislike or straight up start hating me I can't say I'm doing good or that life's fine or that I'm good at something or people get jealous. I can't talk about things I like because no one else likes them. My opinions make people angry, but instead of people confronting or debating me they start talking s--- behind my back. I don't think I wanna be friends with these people anymore.

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anon, in a bout of unparalleled genius, mocks and belittles the acts of a foolish Minecraft youtuber | /r/Greentext

File: Screen Shot_2022_10_03_at(...).jpg (156 KB, 1400x1400) Le M6910 dream Anonymous (ID: (Sw3zrxS1) 06/13/23(Tue)08:50:38 No.17842853 ► >be an extremely popular minecraft youtube guy >want to do a face reveal to boost views >Your fanbase of 13-year-old girls has drawn a lot of p--- of you looking gay with fluffy hair so you have to go for that >spend over 2 years losing weight and getting lean (props ig) >make face reveal looking like a regular white guy >internet acts exactly as you f------ expected >do a f------ FACE UNREVEAL trying to delete every photo with his face in it cause he got insecure after a while what the f--- did dream expect? absolute dumbass

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Anon goes for a ride | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 58 KB PNG 05/16/23(Tue)17:00:56 No.73338848 >having a bad day >go for a ride in the evening >random stranger makes fun of me as I'm passing him >"that's weird, oh well" >happens again with another stranger >and again >don't go outside anymore I'm tired of living. This is not worth it at all, I can't do anything, it's just perpetual misery or disappointment and I know the first response to this will be some kind of mockery or negative in some way. That's if it gets any responses at all. I'm so sick of living. Nothing ever works out or even brings me joy anymore. I'm tired. Just wanted to write it down.

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Anon is completely retarded | /r/Greentext

FISH ELMER'S Whable, No Ran School Glue - Pencils are yummy >be me, kindergarten >playing with little buddy >buddy tells me about his cousin who ate green pencil tips and started pooping green >my tard pre schooler brain thinks thats cool for some reason >ideabulb.jpg >decide to start eating regular pencil tips, to see if my poop becomes grey >unaware that graphite contains traces of lead >poop doesnt become grey >disappointed >be me, 18 now >repeated 3rd grade, horrendous grades, basically no social life, no ideas for my future, khv 7m (6/13 16:29) 73661205 1 Reply And my life's only just started, its only downhill from here. >>73661092 (OP) >pooping green His buddy had parasites Imao. Also shouldn't you see a doctor for lead poisoning?

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Anon likes chess | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Chess 25 KB PNG 06/13/23(Tue)17:19:27 No.900868359 >be me >started to play chess due to boredom and a desire to acquire new habits, plus league of legends and hearthstone made me very angry no matter winning or losing >ff 8 months >started to play more seriously, studying openings and such >enter the biggest losing streak of my life, dumping my elo nearly 200 points >started to get angry and throwing racial slurs to my oponents Why am I like this anons

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