Anon's happy AF | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

65 KB JPG knife >be me few years ago >on double date with best friend and his gf >my gf is 8/10 religious girl >everything is going great >we are paying the bill when best friend mentions something about a butterfly >brainblast.jpeg >"yeah, you butterfly deez nuts in your face" >best friend dies laughing >best friend gf is giggling >my gf is just staring at me >"anon, I think we should see other people" >laugh harder thinking she was joking >she walks out of the restaurant and into best friend gf's car (I drove her there) >everyone is super quiet >"idk what she's on about anon, it was pretty funny" >fast forward to yesterday >talking with best friend >he mentions the double date >laugh my ass off because I'm over it >look her up on Facebook >200 pounds fatter with 2 kids and no husband >kek F--- you Ashley rot in hell.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is an incel | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 7 KB JPEG 6/12/2023, 4:14:07 PM No.98873753 > Be me > 28 y/o virgin incel > never had the balls to talk to female gender, become mysogynist > Go to twitch > see cute girl streaming, not your usual hottub slut > Go to her stream > my username literally comes out of her mouth and she welcomes me to the stream > donate her a buck > she thanks me > Most affection I have ever recieved from a female > I misunderstood females until now > Feelsgoodman.jpeg

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Anon hates modern society | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 6.0 252 KB JPG 06/12/23 (Mon)10:03:44 No.73646717 >be modern man >dont question authority >dont question democracy >dont question the media >worship the rich >be ashamed of being working class >hate on fellow working class people >listen to celebrity advice like they the Buddha >ignore poverty >ignore inequality >ignore the rise of depression >ignore the rise of lonely men >ignore that you get no p---- >ignore that you get zero affection of the opposite gender >no thoughts just consoom >support party A or party B like it makes a difference >think everything is okay and we live in the best time ever >worry about race and gender while the rich stay exploiting the planet >still expected to participate in society F--- this I hate this world, my life and the society I live in

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Ginger ginger | /r/Greentext

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Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies | /r/Greentext

4h (5/9 6:05) 184446463 39 Re . 5 Img JPG · 53KB · (543 × 417) · 1457912457817.jpg 17 Replies >Just got out of a generation defining global pandemic >Russia invades Ukraine, China definitely invading Taiwan any year now >Progress in Al is exploding, unemployment is about to go through the roof >Full on ecological collapse as more and more climate change tipping points are reached Is this the best season of Human Civilization?

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Anon has a dream | /r/Greentext

>be me >it's 1AM >have to pee >like, really bad >get out of bed and waddle to bathroom, half-asleep >start peeing, still half-asleep 155 KB JPG >God it feels so good >look down >completely missed the toilet bowl, p----- all over the floor >ohshit.png >mom saw everything cause i left the door open >OHSHIT.png >wake up >itwasalladream.exe >wait, bed feels weird >mfw i p----- and s--- myself

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Anon gets free starbucks | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/12/23(Mon )06:21:06 No.73645098 21 KB JPG >be me >go to park >sit on bench for hours because I don't have anyone to talk to >notice two beautiful women come up to me >they give me a starbucks drink because they saw me sitting alone for hours >they leave and I never see them again What did they mean this?

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Anon has a unexpected turn | /r/Greentext

28 KB JPG >be me, 14 >sister is 16 >be at home one night, dad is out >sister is wearing bra and panties >boner.jpg >sitting on the couch watching tv >she says she's going to bed, goes to her room >dad gets home >dad and I f--- 2 Replies View Thread

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Anon loses his best fren | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 46 KB JPG >get injured a few times but the vet fixes him up and he recovers >cat now 19yrs old >old injuries are catching up to him >hasn't been able to move very well these past couple of months 06/11/23(Sun)18:52:59 No.73642361 >starts losing balance a week ago, instead of his usual bed he now rests in the hallway near his food. When you pet him it feels like skin and bones. Drinks a lot more now : Anonymous >have cat >a real warrior, fought off hawks and caught rabbits >yesterday is unable to stand on his own, gives me that look with dilated pupils that he is tired and in terrible pain >today unable to lift his head, make him drink water and hand feed him the biggest steak he's ever seen >vet says at his age and state the best they could do would be to make him a bit more comfortable for a month at best >putting down my best buddy tomorrow 我告诉自己不许哭 I told myself don't cry 123 KB JPG 06/11/23(Sun)18:56:57 No.73642402 This broke my heart op. Stay strong

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Anon has a fever dream | /r/Greentext

54 KB JPG >Be me, 13 at the time >Sitting in English class >Ms Davis bends over and I see a tiddy >Pop a huge boner >Didn't realize it at the time but having a 7 incher is unusual for my age >Literally impossible to hide with my athletic shorts >All of the girls swarm my desk >One of them is running her hand up my thigh >Another is taking a selfie with it super close to her face >Suddenly the most popular, hottest girl in class walks over >She pulls my shorts down >Pants still at my ankles, I run out the class in tears >I waddle to principal's office as fast as I can >Explain everything that happened >I forget that my penis is out >He starts sucking my d--- >I s--- >He gets mad, calls my parents, explains that I s--- while he was sucking me off >My parents spank me

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anon discovers biology class. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/06/2023, 16:17:37 No.28307796 83 KB JPEG > be me > obsessed with biology > rat dissection next week > super excited! > disection time!1!!! > see rats face, realise it was a living animal with friends and a family > still need to see the insides > stomach bursts on my clothes > vomit and cry and leave the room > now all the food i smell and eat reminds me of the rat and i refuse to eat it > dangerously underweight > goes to doctor > mfw a rat gives me an eating disorder

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Anon wonders what people will be doing during the Reddit Blackout Protest. | /r/Greentext

File: 61ebjoEXdQL._AC_UF1000.10(...).jpg (62 KB, 920x1000) Reddit Blackout Protest. Anonymous 06/11/23(Sun)17:40:02 No.73641582 ► >So guys, as you probably know, there is a blackout protest going on on Reddit starting soon on June 12th because of the upcoming API changes on Reddit. >Several subreddits that are participating will be private for 48 hours. >Some are threatening to remain privated unless the API changes don't happen. >So I want to ask everyone here who uses Reddit, what are you going to do during the Reddit Blackout Protest?Personally I am gonna go dark and stop using Reddit for 48 hours, maybe longer depending on what is going on, but I would like to hear what you would be doing.

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Anon realizes the REAL problem | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 75 KB JPG 06/11/23(Sun)18:18:44 No.73641996 >be me >autist + khv + neet combo breaker >spend most (all) of my time on /pol/ and /r9k/ >every other thread is about how n------ are destroying society, chads and chad privilege, interracial dating statistics, sexual market value, etc >go to a bar irl and just sit and people watch >early 20s kids on first dates >guys after work grabbing drinks >people watching sports and just getting along >nobody is discussing blackpill, or lookism >nobody gives a s--- about prey eyes or canthal tilt or jaw recession >nobody cares about hypergamy or female monopoly of sex >everyone is literally just having pleasant conversations and enjoying themselves is... is this place the problem? f------ normie. gtfo : Anonymous bet there were no interracial first dates tho, huh? 06/11/23(Sun)18:20:39 No.73642010

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