Anon goes camping | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 01/23/15(Fri)16:32:57 No.24454243 ► >>24454307 >>24454431 >>24454436 File: 1420731949178.jpg (69 KB, 1241x1200) This happend about 2 years ago, true story >me and my buddy out inawoods >we camping >i took my guns with me because logics >saiga 12 drum (because f--- red neck rapists) > 44 magnum (read above) >.357 S&W > svd scoped. (Dont know the name anymore, it was some russian s--- though, PSO?) >anyway we're chilling/hiking/hunting (small game, svd f--- you rabbits) >eating dat fresh rabbit at a campfire >Now my buddy, Frank, tells me he has never shot before. >wut >mfw I'm inawoods with 4 firearms with a guy that never shot before >I thought this was 'merica >anyway I tell him we'll shoot some after we get some sleep >next day >teach him to shoot my .357 >he handles it pretty wel >see him glancing at my glorious seiga >"u wunt sum Frank?" >explain to him how it works >he holds it >hear rustling behind me >look behind me >F------ black bear >Its just curious, no harm done >slowly whip out my .44 though >Frank hasnt noticed the bear yet >More rustling >Frank looks behind him >He's still holding the Seiga >Frank isnt used to the horrors of the outside >He freaks out >MAG DUMPS into the tree line >Mfw drum >He's screaming fucknfuckfuckfuckfuckfuvk >Empty >Still trying to fire >Grab my precious Saiga out of his hands >"No guns for u" >Grab my svd >Go look if the bear survived >find numerous dead rabbits, Birds, holes in trees >Give Frank the "This was you" look every time we pass something. >take a hour to find the bear >poke it with svd to see if its alive >ded >literaly filled with holes >Frank: "Is it dead?" >mfw Took a while before Frank wanted to go out inawoods again. Needles to say I send him straight to the local range to learn how to not kill half a forest. Anonymous 01/23/15(Fri)16:40:12 No.24454307 ► File: 1298165999646.jpg (92 KB, 300x300) >>24454243 Anonymous 01/23/15(Fri)16:56:58 No.24454431 ► File: 1408404258778.jpg (111 KB, 459x612) >>24454243 "learn how to not kill half the forest" My sides Anonymous 01/23/15(Fri) 16:57:27 No.24454436 ► >>24454514 >>24454243 >"this was you" look every time we pass something oh god how many animals did he shred with the Seiga? Anonymous 01/23/15(Fri)17:09:52 No.24454514 ► >>24454436 I counted about 9, thats including the bear. There could ofcourse be more. 3squirels 2rabbits 3birds 1Bear. He also f------ shrekked some trees and branches. You get the idea. It sucks, I love animals/nature. But well, thats how life is eh?

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon ponders mediation | /r/Greentext

Who was in the wrong here? Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)18:56:21 No.73328071 [Reply]► >>73328287 >>73328548 TDLR, things almost got physical after a coworker harassed me constantly, now I don't know what to do. >Have three main coworkers that I have been working with for over a year. >all three of them f--- with me on a daily basis (or every day that I work anyway) >take their s--- day in and day out, seeing it as a "joke" or doing banter back or telling them to stop never works >no HR so I can't report it >they constantly mess with my food/drinks, call me names, belittle me, even shove me around > Yesterday one of them flips my food over the counter unprovoked >by itself that wouldn't be a big deal but I just had enough and that was the straw that broke the camels back >I suddenly snap and yell at him to stop and never do that again >He puffs his chest up and asks if I am serious, I affirm that I am >He asks again if I am for real, I again affirm >He tells me that I can't talk to him that way and points to the parking lot and says that if I think I can talk that way, we're gona have to "take it outside" (aka he said will fistfight) >I don't want to get physical but then the manager (who also hates me and harasses me all the time) walks in and we stop arguing >5 minutes later I see coworker telling out other employees that he seriously thought we were gonna fight >I become red in the face with rage and realize that if I don't leave soon things will escalate more >I clock out and drive home 2 hours early And now the business owners are contacting me asking what happened. I'm not even sure what to tell them since it is 3 people's word against mine, and even though there is security camera footage that won't help me, because they would rather fire one innocent man than three guilty ones (who they need to run the business, I am expendable by comparison). So what should I do? Maybe just go radio silent and never return? Or should I attempt to prove how badly I was treated?

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Anon leaves | /r/Greentext

188 KB PNG >me (28) and gf (24) >together for a year >just moved in to her apartment cause it's closer to work than mine even though my house is 10x better >have just a bunch of clothes, a laptop and some s--- at her place >last sunday morning >"hey anon are you attracted to other women?" >oh boy here we go with the female jealousy s--- >assure her I have no intention of doing anything with anyone else >"I keep reading about and also my friend Roastie#1 recently opened her relationship and I was thinking that maybe that's something you wanted to try" or something along the lines. very diplomatic >explains how she wonders what it would be like to explore that perspective >I reply "I'll think about it" and then say I need to go cook >she keeps following me visibly worried about what I'm thinking, asking me if I'm ok >kiss her and tell her "yeah I'm just hungry" >she leaves to go hang out with her Roastie#3 >pack my s--- light-speed >go home, block her on every app and block her number too >shows up at my door next evening crying, accompanied by 2 of her roasties >go outside talk to one of the roastes and tell her that my gf is not my gf and that she doesn't have any right to know what I'm thinking, or deserves any explanation >very p----- they bang on door and window >threaten to call police >they leave What do you think?

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Racism in America explained | /r/Greentext

The reason white racism is increasing is because this generation of young white men were raised to be the least racist generation of whites to ever exist in the history of this planet. We grew up being taught that racism was bad, that we were ALL going to move past it and work together towards a better future. Even here in the most traditionally racist part of the country, nearly every young white boy in my generation grew up watching black athletes, black actors, listening to black musicians, etc. It was all normal. We were 95% post-racial. So as we got older, we stuck our hands out in friendship to EVERYONE, like we'd been taught to... and then every nonwhite group on the planet came by and sucker-punched us from behind, called us evil white devils, and told us we deserved to die. We were ready and willing to move on from the past, the rest of you weren't. Instead of shaking our hands and marching off together, you chose revenge against the only white people who've ever let their guard down. So now you won't be our friends, we're reforging the identity we were taught to shed.

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His one regret is that he got oneitis | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)19:28:49 No.73328367 [Reply] >>73328527 >>73328676 i was doing fine but then it dawned me. >i will never feel my highschool oneitis' warm breath making pathways inside my ears >i will never experience her reassuring embrace with her legs wrapped around me >i will never caress her blonde hair and kiss every bit of her slowly during and after sex >i will never spend a second not feeling guilty for treasuring her and doing my best just because she exists >i will never rout my social anxiety to be polite to her parents and get along with her mother >i will never accompany her to the places she's always wished to go, holding her hand and leading the way >she will never come to me to talk about anything that bothers her >she will never open her heart to me to and show me the color of her blood >the barrier between us set in this universe will never break >we do not even speak anymore but i can't look at anyone else. every other girl is a disturbance >i will never find someone better. the next girl can only be number 1.1, but never 1 >she will remain forever my reason for loving to exist despite constant pain >she was the one for me i am happy she's doing well. but my feelings will never reach. not even in dreams. and now it's too late. i'm sorry to have been a paralyzed insect around you. you deserve to be loved. what i meant is: i love you.

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Anon wants to meet women | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 66664567 362.2 kB JPG How do I meet women at 24? >100% male workplace >100% male hobbies 4 hr. ago... >90% male nightclubs and bars >zero women under 30 every time I go outside I am sure women just disappear the moment they leave school and respawn with a child 10 years later.

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Anon asking the important questions | /r/Greentext

File: 653ztm9yjtg31.jpg (15 KB, 559x423) Why are indian street vendors so unnecessarily extra? >dirty as f--- >food's dirty as f--- too >tosses s--- around pretending they're good at what they do >most of the time they just spill s--- everywhere like actual autis >stinky

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Anon is a well-liked member of the gang. | /r/Greentext

>be me >drinking vodka and singing old Irish songs with friends >I end up passing out >wake up to my phone stolen and wallet empty >call friends with home phone >"ya hey man sorry about that we were playing poker and you lost them to john ill give him a call" 27 KB PNG >john calls me >"hey anon do you want your s--- back I know you were drunk and all" >get my money and phone back >mfw im a respected part of my friend group

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Anon never uses toilet paper | /r/Greentext

File: wash your f------ ass.jpg (48 KB, 1280x720) Anonymous Boymoder 05/16/23(Tue)12:13:04 No.73335205 ► I have used toilet paper exactly one time in all my life. When I had to take a s--- at the gas station at the mountains. If you do not wash your ass after every time you go to the toilet - you're disgusting and you've got a dirty ass

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social anxiety and NEETS aren’t a good combo | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 365 KB PNG 05/15/23(Mon)20:47:32 No.73333326 2 Replies >be shut-in NEET >decide to go to the mall with mom >walk past people and just kind of ignore them >pass a cute brunette on my left and decide to look at her >eyes meet >slowly wrench my eyes away >rapid heartbeat >thoughts are like "S---! WHY DID I DO THAT? I AM IN SO MUCH TROUBLE! IT'S ALL OVER! I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!" >keep walking trying to look like nothing happened why does this happen to me? i'm still full of adrenaline. View Thread

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Anon does not know his symbols | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)16:36:01 No.637306043 $70 well spent 5 2023051517335500- CC47F0DEC75C1FD3B1F95FA9F9D57667.jpg 278 KB JPG : Anonymous >>637306043 (OP) # its a symbol of jainism if its aligned like that. put in the effort and rotate it 45 degrees you coward 05/15/23 (Mon)16:37:51 No.637306184 >>637306309 # >>637306404 # >>637308718 # >>637313937 # >>637316543 # >>637316628 # >>637317521 # 05/15/23 (Mon)16:39:22 No.637306309 Anonymous >>637306184 # I thought it was a symbol for buddhism? >>637308214 # >>637308404 # >>637316543 # >>637319050 # >>637319570 # 05/15/23(Mon)16:40:37 No.637306404 Anonymous >>637306184 # the flag of the early 1920s Nazi party had it like that

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anon goes super saiyan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)21:19:55 No.73333033 >be me >reded >p--- addict >try to quit watching but it seems so hard 60 KB JPG >have idea >trick my autistic brain into thinking that if i stop watching it i can turn into a super saiyan >went for weeks not watching any thinking that it was part of my super saiyan training 5 Replies i'm gonna do it bros. i'm gonna fight goku and win View Thread

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Elon enjoys bud light | /r/Greentext

E Anonymous (ID: CJFK1yOk) It's Over: Elon Permabans Twit(...) Elon Musk @elonmusk. 2d As soon as @LindaYacc is ready, we will do a Spaces where you can ask us anything 26.8K 14.3K 111K ₁19.8M TopLobsta @TopLobsta. 2d Replying to @elonmusk and @lindayacc We'd prefer you launch @lindayacc into space. 20 1327 05/15/23(Mon)16:02:05 No.427150222 >>427150222 (OP) # Good. lindayacc.jpg 91 KB JPG Anonymous (ID: B4X/OwFM) + >make joke about Elon's WEF jewess CEO >instantly permab& https://twitter.com/TopLobsta 391 Anonymous (ID: KwO8mzGj ₁16,346 05/15/23(Mon)16:03:07 No.427150316 Anonymous (ID: J5ZLINFa 05/15/23 (Mon)16:03:17 No.427150332 Shut the f--- up democrap, Elon is /ourguy/, he's taking us to Mars while you're eating farts >>427150424 # >>427150436 # >>427150840 # >>427151079 # >>427160655 # >>427163441 # >>427169549 # >>427176367 # >>427177386 # 05/15/23(Mon)16:03:58 No.427150396 >>427150222 (OP) # holy f--- its really, that austitc f--- took it personal and perma banned. What a f----- Elon is turning out to be having that WEF bitch on board >>427150701 # >>427152680 # >>427153107 # >>427167586 # >>427171507 # >>427174070 # >>427175354 # >>427175646 #

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