Anon is a well-liked member of the gang. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

>be me >drinking vodka and singing old Irish songs with friends >I end up passing out >wake up to my phone stolen and wallet empty >call friends with home phone >"ya hey man sorry about that we were playing poker and you lost them to john ill give him a call" 27 KB PNG >john calls me >"hey anon do you want your s--- back I know you were drunk and all" >get my money and phone back >mfw im a respected part of my friend group

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon never uses toilet paper | /r/Greentext

File: wash your f------ ass.jpg (48 KB, 1280x720) Anonymous Boymoder 05/16/23(Tue)12:13:04 No.73335205 ► I have used toilet paper exactly one time in all my life. When I had to take a s--- at the gas station at the mountains. If you do not wash your ass after every time you go to the toilet - you're disgusting and you've got a dirty ass

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social anxiety and NEETS aren’t a good combo | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 365 KB PNG 05/15/23(Mon)20:47:32 No.73333326 2 Replies >be shut-in NEET >decide to go to the mall with mom >walk past people and just kind of ignore them >pass a cute brunette on my left and decide to look at her >eyes meet >slowly wrench my eyes away >rapid heartbeat >thoughts are like "S---! WHY DID I DO THAT? I AM IN SO MUCH TROUBLE! IT'S ALL OVER! I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE!" >keep walking trying to look like nothing happened why does this happen to me? i'm still full of adrenaline. View Thread

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Anon does not know his symbols | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)16:36:01 No.637306043 $70 well spent 5 2023051517335500- CC47F0DEC75C1FD3B1F95FA9F9D57667.jpg 278 KB JPG : Anonymous >>637306043 (OP) # its a symbol of jainism if its aligned like that. put in the effort and rotate it 45 degrees you coward 05/15/23 (Mon)16:37:51 No.637306184 >>637306309 # >>637306404 # >>637308718 # >>637313937 # >>637316543 # >>637316628 # >>637317521 # 05/15/23 (Mon)16:39:22 No.637306309 Anonymous >>637306184 # I thought it was a symbol for buddhism? >>637308214 # >>637308404 # >>637316543 # >>637319050 # >>637319570 # 05/15/23(Mon)16:40:37 No.637306404 Anonymous >>637306184 # the flag of the early 1920s Nazi party had it like that

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anon goes super saiyan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)21:19:55 No.73333033 >be me >reded >p--- addict >try to quit watching but it seems so hard 60 KB JPG >have idea >trick my autistic brain into thinking that if i stop watching it i can turn into a super saiyan >went for weeks not watching any thinking that it was part of my super saiyan training 5 Replies i'm gonna do it bros. i'm gonna fight goku and win View Thread

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Elon enjoys bud light | /r/Greentext

E Anonymous (ID: CJFK1yOk) It's Over: Elon Permabans Twit(...) Elon Musk @elonmusk. 2d As soon as @LindaYacc is ready, we will do a Spaces where you can ask us anything 26.8K 14.3K 111K ₁19.8M TopLobsta @TopLobsta. 2d Replying to @elonmusk and @lindayacc We'd prefer you launch @lindayacc into space. 20 1327 05/15/23(Mon)16:02:05 No.427150222 >>427150222 (OP) # Good. lindayacc.jpg 91 KB JPG Anonymous (ID: B4X/OwFM) + >make joke about Elon's WEF jewess CEO >instantly permab& https://twitter.com/TopLobsta 391 Anonymous (ID: KwO8mzGj ₁16,346 05/15/23(Mon)16:03:07 No.427150316 Anonymous (ID: J5ZLINFa 05/15/23 (Mon)16:03:17 No.427150332 Shut the f--- up democrap, Elon is /ourguy/, he's taking us to Mars while you're eating farts >>427150424 # >>427150436 # >>427150840 # >>427151079 # >>427160655 # >>427163441 # >>427169549 # >>427176367 # >>427177386 # 05/15/23(Mon)16:03:58 No.427150396 >>427150222 (OP) # holy f--- its really, that austitc f--- took it personal and perma banned. What a f----- Elon is turning out to be having that WEF bitch on board >>427150701 # >>427152680 # >>427153107 # >>427167586 # >>427171507 # >>427174070 # >>427175354 # >>427175646 #

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Anon opens up | /r/Greentext

File: images (5).jpg (39 KB, 480x360) concionam Anonymous 05/14/23(Sun)13:45:01 No.28947024 >>28947057 >>28947522 >>28947523 >>28947672 >>28948928 >>28948942 >>28949642 >>28949654 >>28949682 >>28949840 >>28949859 >>28950258 >>28951208 >>28951374 >2 weeks ago >"opening up with my girlfriend" >confess that i was bullied in highschool >she confess she was abused in a party after passing out and that's how she lost her virginity >she acts very supportive on the matter >a week ago >found out thanks to my sister (that is friend with the best friend of my girlfriend) that she said she was "losing attraction" after finding out i was bullied >2 days ago >tell my sister that it's alright, but the fact that she (gf) was r---- also makes me lose attraction, I think of her as dirty and broken after finding out so we are even >yesterday >sister go and snitch and tell my girlfriend's best friend what i said >girlfriend's best friend tells my girlfriend >today's morning she come first hour to my apartment covered in tears and anger asking if that's the reason why I haven't touched her in 2 entire weeks. If I think she is gross. (She have a lot of self image issues, she is thin but somehow she thinks she's fat and ugly) i simply told her that if she is losing attraction she should simply say it to my face. >she slaps me and freak out asking and screaming over 5 times in succession "DO YOU THINK IM DIRTY?!" >I also scream; DO YOU THINK IM LESS OF A MAN BECAUSE I WAS BULLIED WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER? >She walks out and turn off her phone >TFW I suppose it's part my fault too. I mishandled the situation. I acted like a scorned woman, what can i say it hurt me to know she was looking down on me. But what it hurts the most is that the fact she lost her virginity while drunk and doesn't even remember the name of the guy also disgust me. So i can't truly judge her, if anything it makes me feel guilty. We have been together over 2 years. I hope this is not over. Let me give you an advice, never "open up" to your partner. It only complicate things.

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Anon shares his research about something | /r/Greentext

Honestly, ignorance is a bliss. I was happier without knowing any of this. So I've been searching info about female sexuality and their opinions about the male body. I'm shocked to learn just how many of them consider male bodies to be unappealing, how seeing a naked dude is not arousing at all, and how women are prettier to look at. To summarize (even "straight" women are saying this) >they find the vast majority of men unattractive >think women are sexier and prettier to look at >only or mostly consumes lesbian p--- (yes, straight women) because apparently straight p--- focuses on the dude's pleasure or some bs excuse, and they draw pleasure from seeing the woman being pleased (why wouldn't they consume p--- with straight couples tailored at women, then?). On the flip side, apparently many lesbians watch gay p--- (???) which again really shows how much of an incoherent mess female sexuality is >many of them find penises repulsive >way more women are bisexual compared to men Men sexuality and attraction is so simple and logical in comparison. Just imagine if dudes said that male bodies are more appealing, found most women unattractive and exclusively masturbated to gay p---, lol. Tb.h I feel rejected on a fundamental level. Like, as an individual dude I'm already automatically discarded because I'm unattractive (fair enough, it's something I had already accepted), but being seen as unappealing from the get go, is kinda hurtful. On top of that, even if you somehow ignore all of this, men are much more interested in women that vice versa, women they initiate most break ups and divorces etc, which makes the whole attraction unrequited. I guess I need to get a grip, but learning this shocked me so much...

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Anon the unfortunate | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 18 KB JPG 05/15/23(Mon)08:07:11 No.89979678 >be me entering my mid-late 20s >At the age now where my testosterone levels and libido start to naturally decline >Can't even get fully hard anymore due to years of deathgrip >mfw both my sex drive and d--- broke before I even got to experience having sex

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Anon has vivid daydreams | /r/Greentext

1640215545806.jpg (135 KB, 1080x969) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)12:52:54 No.73328041 ✓ >Whenever I hear a woman talking, I instantly start imagining myself punching her in the face >Have long, vivid daydreams of fighting woman, even women who are nice to me >Will literally feel my a heady bloodlust come over me when a female cashier asks me what I want to order >Sometimes I can feel my hands cramping from the clenching I do when I imagine crushing a random lady's windpipe between my fingers >Will literally have the voice in my head screaming "HIT HER! HIT HER! HIT HER!" the entire time I'm talking to a stranger if they're a woman

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Anon has a sister | /r/Greentext

The game is rigged from the start Anonymous 05/15/23 (Mon)16:09:30 No.73326609 [ >be me, 11 >Have 9 year old sister >We're friends and hang around all day >She stops hanging out with me and hangs with her friends >Ok, that's to be expected, but I don't have any friends >She turns from sweet to being mean to me about it >2 years more pass by, I'm 15, she's 13 >I'm just starting to grow up. >Let her but her own clothes >Let her drink alcohol in small quantities >How is that fair? >2 years later >At 13 I still look like a kid, meanwhile she's already as tall as me and starts to have a figure >Mom comforts me with the usual "girls grow earlier than boys" >I could understand that with girls my age, but not younger >Besides her face, she already looks like an adult >Family treats her more like an adult >"Well, she's just more... adult" >How? >"People will judge you on your appearance and she gives more of an adult appearance" >She starts to hang around boys my age, but they look good because they're equally grown >I'm despised by girls my age because I look like a twig >I can't grow muscle despite doing exercise >We've both had good grades but mine begin to drop >That makes my parents despise me more >Barely pass my last year in HS and been a neet for 2 years >Meanwhile she's going to college Man, why do girls even grow earlier than boys. That's b-------.

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Women won't date a guy who lives with his mom, but will date a guy who lives with his wife | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous d 05/15/23(Mon)12:31:34 No.28951766 Remember what they took from you. 528.jpg 189 KB JPG >Ask girl out >She rejects me because i live with my mom (1 have a career and can perfectly rent something, but my mom is old and I want to be close to her in case that she needs me) >Discover the girl that rejected me is no dating a married man Interesting isn't it? Women won't date a guy who lives with his mom, but will date a guy who lives with his wife and children.

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Anon hit the love jackpot | /r/Greentext

images (1) (23).jpg 34 KB JPG A chick in my Uni asked me out. She's a solid bad bitch, has massive tiddies, is politically incorrect, has dark af humor, a muscle mommy, a massive gambling addict, a crypto millionaire, an amazing cook and she gets my memes A match made in heaven, life couldn't get any better

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