Anonymous Be serious /b/ am I a f----- 75 KB JPG 04/18/23(Tue)09:45:14 No.897795736 >be me >college-aged male >f------ manlet >5 foot 4 >feminine fat distribution (thick ass and thighs) >get hit on by str8 dudes whenever I go out >I don't even recognize myself as a man anymore >j------- alone in my room to the thought of being a girl so I could date >go to lgbt support group mainly just to complain to f------ about how the gigachad they're chasing all want to date me >see trad-looking lesbian >churchgoer, modest, virgin >genius idea >introduce self as trans woman looking to date other women >ask her out >she believes I am a woman and I am dating her >have sex >nut inside >she's not on birth control >she misses her period "It's probably just stress" >getting nervous >buy a pregnancy test >kinda sad it's negative but life goes on and we really can't afford a child >continue living happy domestic life having unprotected sex "Man it's crazy how she hasn't got pregnant yet" >need extra cash >donate to sperm bank >f------ infertile >makes no sense >go to doctor >f------ intersex got my p---- stitched at birth >I'm actually a girl dating another girl

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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File: Screenshot 20241127-155712.png (228 KB, 742x721) Something Happened Anonymous (ID: HG6Lars) 11/27/24(Wed)17:35:15 No.489774321 ► >Polls all indicate a Harris victory, though close >Ann Selzer poll, known as a canary in a coal mine, indicated Harris winning lowa >Trump campaign suspiciously quiet nearing the end of the campaign >Harris campaign had significant energy >North Carolina predicted to be close >Virginia unusually red >The four countries willing and able to f--- with US democracy (Iran, China, Russia, NK) stand to benefit from a Trump win (cause it's destabilizing) >Billionaires cozy up to Trump despite a Harris victory being predicted >TRUMP WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 20 YEARS A REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >WITH AN APPROVAL RATING EQUIVALENT TO CANCER Bros, I'm telling you, something funky happened

☐ Anonymous 11/25/24(Mon) 10:39:13 No. 17295889 >>17295909 >>17295925 >>17295935 >>17295976 >win independence >DON'T devolve into military dictatorship or absolute monarchy >start off with fresh land and an unusually high literacy rate >neighbors are retarded savages who live at the mercy of nature >large ocean between them and European chimpouts >shitgoesdown.jpg >"here tovarish buy my land I need to fund a chimpout" >ok > "here America buy my land, I need to fund my own le chimpout" >ok >"hey America there was a chimpout in Texas we'll join you (and won't secede later) if you help" >ok >*doubles land in two years* It's amazing how well they took advantage of what they had. Many nations have completely fumbled the bag during their development. What went so right?

Anonymous (ID: Lvuvmf4p 11/21/24(Thu)03:45:24 No.489109549 16 KB JPG >4chan known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >X known as a right-wing Nazi haven >allows all types of opinions and rhetoric >reddit known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center >bluesky quickly becoming known as a left-wing haven >bans anyone posting anything even slightly right of center Really makes you think.

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It’s over for anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Bowsette song has sent me into(...) And she won't even care for you I fear 247 KB JPG 04/16/23(Sun)00:53:37 No.72972496 Its over >be me >listen to Bowsette song >remember time I ignored a girl who was very clearly into me to chase a hotter girl >hotter girl turns out to be a lesbian >other girl switches schools and I never see her again >no girl has shown interest in me since >regret

Steep prices | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/18/23(Sat) 19:00:54 No.19064954 1679176125410638 (1).gif 3.12 MB GIF >tea comes in big and medium sizes >Big tea is more expensive than medium tea >Order medium tea >Get a glass of hot water and one tea unit package >Order big tea >Get a glass with a couple more ounces of hot water and the same size of tea unit package They are charging me more for extra hot water I can order a medium tea and ask for free water : Anonymous >>19064954 (OP) # shut the f--- up 03/18/23(Sat) 19:07:38 No.19064980

admin meets a sigma male | /r/Greentext

Story from today >Go to use restroom downloadfile.jpg 27 KB JPG >Pick the urinal on the far left as it's the closest (there are 3 for context) >Soon after another guy comes, takes the far right urinal >Randomly a third guy comes in and exclaims "Ayooo, it's peepee time" >He approaches middle stall and says "mind if I squeeeeze in here?" Before doing so regardless >"How are we doing today, fellas?" >Start to awkwardly laugh, finish pissing and and got to wash my hands >He follows me, watches me wash my hands, then proceeds to not wash his and leave Did I meet a sigma male?

Anon loses attraction. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Me: Mom, Dad, I have a girlfriend Parents: Oh thank god we thought you were gay me: I am 04/18/23(Tue) 15:54:46 No.72998191 >get trans gf >nice relationship >everything going well >she has a cute voice really high and girly >one day playing a game together 128 KB JPG >she loses to me >says "f---" in a really manly voice >shocked >instantly lose all attraction >what should I do bros?

Anon kills a real skinwalker and saves the day | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >be me, 22 >camping innawoods with two friends >sitting around campfire, me and friend 1 are smoking cigarettes >friend 2 goes to take a s--- and grab firewood, comes back after a few minutes 07/15/21(Thu)08:56:43 No.29228061 >chain smoking, like 4 hours go by and one of us has a c-------- in our mouth or hand at all times >friend 2 is getting increasingly bothered by smoke, asks if we can stop >wut.jpg >remember reading somewhere that Natives say skinwalkers don't like tobacco smoke >realize friend 2 smells like s---, too >friend 1 and I come to the conclusion friend 2 is a skinwalker >I hack friend 2 to pieces with the hatchet we brought as friend 1 holds him down >makes f----- up noises while axing him, definitely a skinwalker >we smell a weird coppery smell, definitely a skinwalker >friend 1 and I throw the bloody chunks into the fire >crisis averted And that's how my friend and I killed a skinwalker Saul, if you see this, put me in the video >>29230722 #

Anon decides someone else's fate | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Steve.jpg 91 KB JPG 86 decides what happens to steve the cat let him out 04/18/23(Tue)08:35:01 No.897784302 : Anonymous 04/18/23(Tue)08:37:27 No.897784397 HEY /6/ : Anonymous 04/18/23(Tue)08:37:53 No.897784409 lack some timestamp here >>897784495 # >>897784635 # bread cat : Anonymous 04/18/23(Tue)08:38:09 No.897784422 : Anonymous cat goes free : Anonymous 04/18/23(Tue)08:38:50 No.897784450 Release immediately or I will have u tracked down 04/18/23(Tue)08:39:01 No.897784453

Anon doesn’t like a particular comic artist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous ignore the sexist trolls so they go away that one lady with the cringy comics 04/17/23 (Mon)16:14:55 No.897766808 make several comics about them, giving them the attention they want @lequirkycumic patreon.com/whothefuckgivesmoneytothischick le quirky cat This woman is too goddamn easy to mock lequirkycumic.com 3966916B-AE47-4E12-A915-CBBACA99EE26.jpg 332 KB JPG

Femanon is redpilled | /r/Greentext

07/21/21 (Wed)12:42:03 No.64657226 >have a crush on a handsome successful chad >use incel advice to make myself attractive (dont swear or drink, dont wear too much makeup, act cute and pure, be trad and modest, make my hobbies baking and knitting and s--- like that, make it known im a virgin to him, stay at home and want to be a wife and mommy) : Anonymous 9 KB JPG >he ends up choosing a slutty, binge drinking, bimbo cakeface girl who runs her own business and is extremely unfeminine and loud and hates kids Stupid s----- incel advice only works for attracting betas.

Anon is livin’ Las Vegas | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: CfNHW8YS ) 06/24/14(Tue)00:32:23 No.552734235 >rent a convertible sports car and a parachute >get your favorite handgun and shoot it in the air around a police station >high speed chase ensues >lead the police into the desert and wait for media choppers >itstime.jpg >tie parachute cord around your neck and throw a brick on the gas >deploy parachute, snapping your neck and simultaniously dragging your lifeless body into the air behind the car >parasail across the desert until your car dies Bonus points if the parachute says Ron Paul 2008 Bonus points if wearing assless fursuit

Anon gives it a shot | /r/Greentext

$Bell : Anonymous 42 KB JPG 6:28 PM boards.4chan.org 02/02/19(Sat) 18:22:36 No.791644591 >approach her on stairs going up to biology class > I say hi and then immediately fall walking up the stairs and hit my face square on one of the steps and my phone gets flinged over the railing >look up and she's laughing >ask if I'm okay I say yes and then I do it >"would you wanna hangout sometime?" >she says she has a boyfriend and walks off >I hear her laughing through the door >mfw when I fractured my jaw broke my phone and got rejected at the same time >>791644800 # >be me >beta pretty good looking >have had crush on qt 3.14 for years and finally get the courage to ask her out. Anonymous >>791644591 (OP) # It's all right, OP, 4chan won't laugh at you. 02/02/19(Sat)18:24:40 No.791644728 02/02/19(Sat)18:25:50 No.791644800 Anonymous >>791644591 (OP) # >>791644728 # HAHAHAHA f------ retard$

Anon doesn't have supportive parents | /r/Greentext

ANT RX P Th Ho GND /b/ 2h (4/17 14:20) 897758169 19 Re . 7 Img JPG 74KB (964 × 876) mini_whip.jpg >be me >11 yrs old >in electronics camp >first radio camp >guys show us antennas and radios >interested.wmv >one guy notices me >"hey anon wanna talk on the radio?" >HOLYFUCKINGSHIT.mp3 >"yes sir" >he fires up a radio station >hear static >he tells me what to say >i say it >someone on the other side says hello >i ask where they are >f------ singapore >mindblown.jpg >i start to like it very much >ffw a decade >21 now >got a shortwave reciever >and a homemade antenna >mom and dad hate it >they sit me down and call me autistic >mfw my hobby makes me autistic >mfw my hobby is "illegal" >mfw

admin talks to a rock | /r/Greentext

1C696DEB-2A1B-4275-8260-886BCD4B1BD1.jpg 89 KB JPG >Be me, a rock >Glacier broke me off of my mother rock and deposited me inside a hill >FFW a couple of billion years, some guys dig me up. Sit me on top of the hill. Nice view >They tell me I'm a glacier erratic and one of the biggest they've ever found >They name me after this guy Chamberlin who studied glacier geology. He was all about my family and me. >Feels good man >A newspaper called my another name one time >These people called social justice warriors are upset about that name they called me that one time >They say I make them feel sad >Men with a big truck pick me up and move me somewhere else. >I miss my hill >I'm just a rock guys. I'm not racist.

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