Anon becomes Muslim | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 01/13/19(Sun)10:04:10 No.7512136 120 KB JPG >be me >on airplane >3 muslims are sitting in the back >two of them get up and start walking to the front >as one passes me, he says "soon we will all see allah." >he gets to the front of the plane and starts reciting the koran >he ended up converting 12 people to islam thank you allah

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon's dog gets attacked | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 89 KB JPG 01/25/23(Wed)09:25:06 No.893230789 So when did you realize you were racist I'll start >be me a few days ago >let my dog outside to s--- and do dog stuff >n----- neighbors dog gets under my fence >attacks my dog and takes its ear off >proceed to yell at her and threaten to shoot dog >calls me a cracker and blames me personally for slavery >says she will let her n----- dog eat my wife and toddler >call cops and animal control tell me they can't do s--- unless I sue >this n----- bitch proceeds to continue to threaten me and has her groid boyfriend threaten me >apparently their dog has a history of attacking other dogs >currently waiting on my lawyer to get back to me with how to proceed with legal action >might just inject a hotdog with antifreeze and rat poison and throw it over the fence >have learned to hate n------ Was not racist until this happened f--- her and f--- the n------ so tell me when did you realize that n------ don't deserve life

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Anon’s gains almost killed her | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/08/18(Thu)17:49:44 No.45069329 >>45069376 >>45069386 >>45069483 >>45069557 File: sucidal.jpg (88 KB, 900x877) I am British, since I started getting /fit/ I got a f------ qt Saudi girl at University beaten half to death by her family because I posted pictures through her letterbox of myself posing, rubbing protein powder on the Saudi flag with a note tht said 'even sharia wouldn't forbid these gains'. they were f------ furious and almost honour killed her worst part is that she didn't even know me, I was just stalking her.feels bad.

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Anon is very wholesome | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 22 KB JPG 05/23/19(Thu)10:56:29 No.800433348 >Talking to the girl I love about her boyfriend >She's so happy around him >She gets excited just talking about him I'm glad she's happy. It makes me happy.

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anon takes a big fat L | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12 KB PNG 01/25/23(Wed)05:24:20 No.893219022 >be me 26m >talking to 2 different girls at the same time >lets call them girl A an girl B >girl A 8/10 doesn't want to date but always dtf >girl B 4/10 overweight slightly unkept but wants a relationship >girl A is leaving state soon >hatch plan >tell girl B I want to take things slow >have as much as wild sex with girl A as I can before she leaves >then go into a relationship with girl B >everything is going well >that is until girl Bs mom steps in >"Anon it's been months why won't you date my daughter" >tell her the same thing I tell her daughter >fw to new years day >girl B texts me >tells me that her mom fixed her up with one of her friends >girl Bs mom f------ sabotaged me >mfw I realize Im gonna be alone when girl A leaves >mfw I realize I could of had my cake an ate it too if I just cheated I should of just f------ cheated Anons

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Anon’s hygiene are questionable | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (SAD PEPE HOURS) 132 KB JPG 11/30/22(Wed)14:32:09 No.889972328 >go through sad breakup >get tinder to cope by finding a hookup >finally find a chick that'll let me shag her >red flags but I'm sad and lonely so do her >two days later there are pimples on my d--- >s--- s--- s--- s--- did I get STDs >be extremely retarded so try to pop the pimples with beedles in hopes of getting rid of whatever I have >next day there are more so go to doctor >"anon w-- were you doing. You can't treat std like that anyway. And that's not even std. Apply this anti bacterial cream and keep good hygiene for a week, you'll be fine." I'm all clear but have permanent scars all over my d---

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Educated Conversation From /lit/ | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/18(Thu)02:51:32 No.11025519 >>11025299 (OP) # >a pizza elicits a more intense emotional and sensual response in girls than I ever have or will and to think there are people who will be shocked by my suicide >>11025561 #

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Anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 7 KB JPG 01/24/23(Tue)20:49:28 No.71951526 >catfish some guy for half a year on discord >get bored of it and just block him >before i do so i tell him i have weird feelings about him >its been almost 3 years now and he keeps making at least 2 accounts every month to readd me >never accept >he still has the chat open and pins messages from time to time, wishing me happy birthday and telling me he misses me 3. f------. years. at least 100 accounts to readd me. What do you think is worse? Letting him keep doing it or telling him I was a guy the whole time. Idk if he still browses r9k, he used to lol

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Anon needs his eyes checked | /r/Greentext

>finished heavy set of decline press >sit up >see guy with the biggest pecs ive ever seen >h-------- >they seriously stick out like half a foot >wonder what he did to get them like that >so big >so round 48 KB PNG >thats a woman >its a girl with b-------

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anon laughs at cryptobros | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Uv1NOMOU) MALE 05/12/22(Thu)21:06:32 No.48714526 W-Would you like fries with that, sir? maxresdefault.jpg 159 KB JPG C C >I-I used to be a millionaire you know! >It w-was in t-this thing called crypto currency! It was the future! Yeah that's great, can you hurry up with my order? I have places I need to be.

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Anon dumps some hard to swallow IQ pills. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: (Goemegr) 06/26/21(Sat)22:31:26 No.327667712327667818>>327668086 2327685429 >>327665089 (OP) Not that anon but I have the IQpills from that thread in text, will dump. >I did IQ research as a grad student, and it involved a lot of this stuff. Did you know that most people (95% +) with less than 90 IQ can't understand conditional hypotheticals? >For example: >How would you have felt yesterday evening if you hadn't eaten breakfast or lunch? >What do you mean? I did eat breakfast and lunch. >Yes, but if you had not, how would you have felt? >Why are you saying that I didn't eat breakfast? I just told you that I did. >Imagine that you hadn't eaten it, though. How would you have felt? >I don't understand the question. >It's really fascinating. We did research on convicts in San Quentin. They're absolute f------ retards, at least 50% illiterate. Anonymous (ID: (Goomegr) 06/26/21(Sat)22:32:20 No.327667818>>327667906 >>327668933 >>327669227 >>327669920 >>327685429 >>327688917 >>327667712 >Other interesting phenomenon around IQ involves recursion. >For example: >Write a story with two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue. >Most literate people can manage this, especially once you give them an example. >Write a story with two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue. >In this story, one of the characters must be describing a story with at least two named characters, each of whom have at least one line of dialogue. >If you have less than 90 IQ, this second exercise is basically completely impossible. >Add a third level (frame') to the story, and even IQ 100's start to get mixed up with the names and who's talking. >Turns out Scheherazade was an IQ test! Anonymous (ID: (Goomegr) 06/26/21(Sat)22:33:08 No.327667906>>327667980 >>327684917 >>327685429 >>327686122 >>327667818 >Time is practically impossible to understand for sub 80's. They exist only in the present, can barely reflect on the past and can't plan for the future at all. >Sub 90's struggle with anachronism too. For example, I remember the 80-85's stumbling on logic problems that involved common sense anachronism stuff. >For instance: >Why do you think that military strategists in WWII didn't use laptop computers to help develop their strategies? >I guess they didn't want to get hacked by Nazis? >Admittedly you could argue that this is a history knowledge question, not quite a logic sequencing question, but you get the idea. >Sequencing is super hard for them to track, but most 100+ have no problem with it, although I imagine that a movie like Memento strains them a little. >Recursion was definitely the killer, thought >Recursive thinking and recursive knowledge seems genuinely hard for people of even average intelligence (although at San Quentin there weren't too many of those!) Anonymous (ID: Goemegr) 06/26/21(Sat)22:33:49 No.327667980327668199 >>327685031 >>327685429 >>327667906 >It's the main reason why so many people with sub-90 IQ are sociopathic or psychopathic. They don't have the mental computing power to model other people's thoughts and feelings. I've seen it over and over with convicts. >How do you think that man felt when you beat him? >Dunno. >How do you think that boy's mother felt when she heard that her son was dead? >Dunno. >It comes across as psychopathic, but these people literally don't have the brainpower to build even a crude model of someone else's mind, let alone populate it with events that are in the past. Anonymous (ID: (Goemegr) 06/26/21(Sat)22:35:47 No.327668199>>327673995 >>327679808>>327685429>>327685570 >>327685800327687876 327687892 >>327667980 >I forgot to mention another important part of abstract reasoning, which is 'mapping'. Basically, expressing one thing in terms of another. >For example: >Imagine a picture of an arrow, colored in a gradient from yellow to green, following the direction of the arrow. >Imagine a one-way residential street, with ascending house numbers, with the lowest number being at the entrance of the street and the highest number being at the exit. >If you mapped the arrow onto the street, what color would house number 1 be? >This question really isn't tricky for most 100+s. It has some minor ambiguities, but anyone of normal intelligence can do the 'mapping': that is, the expression of one thing in terms of another. >However, for sub-90's, this stuff is REALLY difficult. They struggle terribly with it. Sub 80's just can't do it at all. >Anything under 90 will routinely make errors with even commonplace mapping (like subway maps, time schedules, etc.) Sub 85s start to get into the territory where they can't learn to read, as symbolic mapping of phonemes (or even morphemes) even with constant drilling, is just too tricky. >Math is another area I could get into, but the long and the short of it is that it's heavily decided by IQ. That's a bit tautological, since it's a principal IQ measurement, but you know what I mean. >As for the criminal narcissists etc: I honestly don't know. However, sufficiently high IQ autists can emulate theory of mind, and do. If you're smart enough, you can build a little simulator in your brain. You also need to be smart enough to appreciate the utility of it. >I suspect that any autist or narcissist over 120 can do this stuff regularly without getting tired, but it's like playing a strenuous game of chess for them. They really don't have the 'hardware' for empathy. That's it. >reeeee formatting f--- you I already reformatted it for normie consumption and have been disseminating it, not retranslating to autist

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Anon relates to Mayans | /r/Greentext

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Anon loves his papa | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 26 minutes ago 09CFC8C4-39FE-4270-9838-FA5F57F4F14E.jpg (33.4 KB, 500x282) 71949323 it gets better > be me > 18 year old wageslave > wageslave every day working whenever i can > have good dad > never makes me pay for much, tried his best to make me happy and make up for bad childhood > always love him > fast forward a bit, he goes through surgery, cant work, has to stay home and rot until better > unable to pay rent > dad freaks out in silence > he shyly asks if i can help with rent, asks for $400, says he's disappointed with having to ask me > no problem pops.jpeg > go out with friends that night, hit up ATM before going home > go home eventually > dad is outside taking dog out, something is obviously on his mind > walk up to him with $400 and a little extra > he stares at me, takes it slowly > we stand there for a second, he just hugs me > "love you son, thank you so much" > "uhhh, no problem dad, love you" > go inside home > dad is proud of me > happy we're all gonna make it somehow, someway

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