Anon has a sister | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

01/18/23(Wed)19:58:13 No.71872320 >looked through my 15 year old sisters stuff while she was away because it's f------ hilarious >found a diary >jackpot 55 KB PNG >its all dated and organized, and written with maximum precision which is very odd because everything she owns is filthy and her handwriting has always been a : Anonymous mess >lots of cringey stuff for the most part until about 3 months ago >she's extremely infatuated with this boy >the text about him get more and more unhinged the deeper I read >from simple "I hope he notices me today" to paragraphs about how she followed him home and stole his jacket while his family was away >Huh. So that's where that unfamiliar oversized jacket came from. >paragraphs and detailed images of what it'd be like to dissect him (she's an excellent artist which made it 1000x more creepy) >paragraph after paragraph about all the freaky sex she'd have with him, most of it ending in death I'm honestly f------ scared.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon goes to work | /r/Greentext

First day at work Anonymous 01/19/23(Thu)12:47:50 No.624834336 >My first day at work >Happy >Accidentaly starts a resonance cascade, destroying the entire facility >F------ kills an entire military unit >Get attention of the most powerful empire in the multiverse, causing the doom of my planet >Gets kidnapped by a palid f-- Can you guys help me with this?

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Anon is japanese | /r/Greentext

Anonymous ASTH WO WARS 11 KB PNG 12/11/18(Tue)20:44:40 No.787152545 >be me >japanese >living with a white family in the US >pretty sweet gig honestly >one day their bitchy white daughter kicks down my bedroom door >call her a baka and tell her to get out >"FOR THE LAST TIME ANON YOU'RE NOT JAPANESE YOU'RE JUST A F------ WEEB" >mfw

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Anon spots a subliminal message | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Jack in the box 94 KB JPG 01/19/23(Thu)08:50:45 No.892904480 >jacking euphemism for masterbating >box euphemism for vagina >jack in the box clear innuendo for masterbating a vagina, even has tacos on the menu despite being american food Which one of you degenerates came up with the name for this company? Nicely done.

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Anon explains music | /r/Greentext

Country music: >"I saw bigfoot by the river, yee- haw m-----------, imma f--- my sister" Metal: 135 KB JPG >"my ex dumped me cause I spent all my money on Monster and I cried like a bitch" *guitar solo kicks in* *screaming intensifies* Rock: >"I f----- more bitches and did more coke then Hugh Hefner and Charlie Sheen" *stage diving intensifies* Modern pop music: >"eat ass and believe in yourself. get creampied by 60 guys in one hour, but remember- you can do anything you want to, girl. The sky is the limit" Mumble rap: >"yo bitch on the block (yuhh) >"she gon suck my c--- (Gucci) >"I roll up with the glock (brrrt) >"in my new Bugatti (esketit) Drake: >"I just want my mommy (mommy)" >"Got cummies in my tummy (tummy) >"she text me say she horny (horny)" >"I'm too shy to touch her p---- (p----)

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I wish we could experience the memes of year 3000 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 70 KB JPG what about 10? 277 Replies / 40 Images Anonymous 06/04/15(Thu)23:33:51 No.619872483 Our earth is only 4 billion years old in a universe that is 14 billion years old. What could a species learn, create, and do that has a 2 or 3 billion year head start on us? 59 KB JPG Hide View Thread 06/05/15(Fri)02:18:53 No.619893946 they probably have better memes.

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Industrial revolution and it's coping wageslaves | /r/Greentext

Anonymous YOU SHOULD How do wageslaves cope?? HAVE LISTENED 110.5 kB JPG 53338353 >Millions of years of evolution >Thousands of years of civilization >Hundreds of years of global wars, revolutions and human right movement >You have endure 16 stressful years of school >After all this, congrats!!! You gotta wake up early, commute to work, waste 5 days of the week doing the s--- you hate 6 REPLIES 0 IMAGES >With the money you make you cannot even buy a s----- apartment in the city you live in I am THIS close to being a violent antifa/ anti-capitalism/anti-establishment/anti-work militant. How do you cope? I wanna punch random people on the streets and bang my head to the walls until I kill myself. Anonymous n9yc5WD1 | 53338371 >>53338353 (OP) idk man get some hobbies Kek Clean it up wagie Anonymous >>53338353 (OP) Move to the forest, get some fresh air. 2 hr ago ... 53338386 Anonymous 63ul1KKj | 53338414 >>53338353 (OP) REPLY 2 hr ago Anonymous j7nnpmCh| 53338400 >>53338353 (OP) You start to self-sustain since it's not worth it to wageslave You can move to somewhere were shoplifting is legal too and hobomaxx 2 hr ago 2 hr ago 2 hr ago ●●● ●●● ●●●

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Anon's coworker. | /r/Greentext

File: pepe confused.jpg (75 KB, 1000x1000) Otf is wrong with women? Anonymous 01/18/23(Wed)22:34:36 No.71881317 [Reply] >>71881966 >be me >working wagie job >me and this coworker had some chemistry >then later figure out she was leading me on >because she told me at work and all the others that she hooked up with a guy >any flirts, touches, etc stop from her. I'm glad I've dodged a bullet but... >Be me, again. >still same job, new girl coworker comes after a few months >we start building chemistry >the other coworker that i used to like notices >hovering/orbiting around me >says "ive missed you" while i talk to this coworker >keeps jumping into our conversations >mentions the times we hanged out a while ago >basically, it strangely felt like she was marking her territory. Why are women like this? You literally could've taken me but instead decided to hook up with a random guy that you don't even know if you like. We still "act" like best friends cause I work there, but after she hooked up I've turned sour and can't even find myself in a romantic relationship with a woman like that. If the obvious answer is jealousy, then this doesn't feel bad at all.

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Cant post other than this format | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: k3eazSnQ) 70 KB JPG U good bro? 09/26/20(Sat)20:43:43 No.279414971 > Browsing r/greentext >No u/Cala-best-girl >account suspended, commies got m

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Anon embraces the Spirit of '76 | /r/Greentext

File: well you can tell.jpg (35 KB, 492x475) Anonymous 02/02/22(Wed)20:46:39 No.871936248 >be me >sperg who still uses old-ass ipod nano >prolific user of youtube-to-mp3 sites >listen to Disco Inferno for the first time >hey this is pretty catchy >put it through the yt>mp3 site >put it on itunes >put it on ipod >start listening to it >damn that was fun >listen to it again >put it on repeat >listen to it while doing homework >find old boot-cut jeans >find shiny black loafers >wear those together with slicked-back hair >2 days later (10 minutes ago) >notice that I had played the song 107 times >song is 3 minutes, 34 secs >214 seconds * 107 plays = 22898 >22898 seconds / 3600 seconds (per hour) I have spent six of the last 48 hours slowly becoming an autistic extra from Saturday Night Fever.

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Anon trolls on Grindr | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous trolling on grindr is pretty hilarious >go on grindr >find some f----- who is desperate to meet up >make sure we meet up in the dead of night at a park >blow him and let him nut in my mouth >mfw this f----- didnt know he got pleasured by a STRAIGHT guy f------ queers >>63341602 # 04/23/21(Fri)04:15:08 No.63341349

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Good job Anon. Proud of you. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 128 KB JPG 03/25/21(Thu)16:38:11 No.60558695 >be 400 pound fat f--- >decide to lose weight because friends are genuinely concerned >now only 200 pounds >old guy who occasionally walks my same route notices >congratulates me >Feels pretty good >like a week later see a different old fellow on the path >"You're the fella who lost all that weight ain'tcha?" >Genuinely makes my day Why the f--- didn't I do this years ago?

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life is simple for anon. | /r/Greentext

File: 1660693917050.jpg (155 KB, 850x850) people exaggerate how hard life is Anonymous 01/18/23(Wed)17:04:45 No.71877993 [Reply] >>71882282 >graduate high school >get a fulltime labor job >learn skills on the way >live with parents for few more years >move out with savings >cook for yourself and dont spend your money carelessly Where's the hard part? +47 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view.

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