Anon goes to military summer camp | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous Gi 10 KB JPG 01/30/21(Sat)02:14:16 No.62089777 >Be me >Live in the original tortilla land >Go to military summer camp a few years ago >Going really nice, like it >One day a tard gets assigned to our company >We now have to carry this dead weight with us Ffw a few days >Go visit a nearby military base >Walk 3 km to the bus stop >Tard asks if he can go to the bathroom > Officer says no >1'5 hours in the bus >Doesn't go to the bus' bathroom for some reason >We get to the base >We form up at the hangar/hall >200 kids and many military personnel >the tard starts pissing himself >everybody looking and laughing, even the soldiers were laughing >the sergeant just looks away with dissapointment >goes back to the base with the same pant >Mfw we were the piss company for the rest of the camp

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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anons in the jail | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2 KB JPG idea.jpeg >i reply "tiddies" 12/01/22(Thu)14:32:20 No.890014164 >be me >25 y/o anon >get arrested for smoking weed because laws are gay >get taken to jail >cop says "anything you say will be held against you in court" >other cop says "f---, this guy's good" >court date arrives >qt3.14 public defender walks in oshit.png 1 Reply >she comes up to me >gets on the floor >everybody walk the dinosaur View Thread

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Anon wants to have pure german children | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 59ZPwuAo My current girlfriend is Asian(...) 12/01/22(Thu)14:56:11 No.406636312 35 KB JPG be me white, tall, muscular, Germanic have had 20-30 girlfriends (stopped counting) my ultimate and my best girlfriend ever is not white > She is tiny and from South-Korea. > She is by far the most faithful girlfriend ever > I would trust her with my life. > She is very smart and funny. > She studied German language and literature at collage > But I need Germanic sons... (She can't deliver) What do, /pol/? This is the best gf I was gonna get, ever. Should I leave her just because of skin color?

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Anon is a president | /r/Greentext

47 KB JPG >be elected President with under 50% of the popular vote >be most unpopular president in American history >have almost no political experience >be called radical, funny-looking buffoonish moron >fail major debates (according to the press) >Democrats threaten secession nationwide >riots kick off in major cities across country >see approval rating fall below 35-40% almost immediately >get called fascist nutjob and tyrant by all the press >watch as nation erupts into frenzied political violence and chaos between fringe factions >be President Abraham Lincoln >pic unrelated

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Anon gets high | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/19/22(Sun)12:50:45 No.69103270 >Buy $200 worth of weed >Take one hit >Get paranoid about going to prison 18 KB JPG >Flush it all down the toilet >Remember it's legal in my state How's your day going, Robots?

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Anon needs to put his thumb in his mouth and blow | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 16 KB JPG 12/17/18(Mon)09:59:00 No.48760867 What exercise to improve on this condition? 5 Replies /1 Image 3 KB JPG View Thread : Anonymous 12/17/18(Mon)10:01:38 No.48760890

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Anon , student of Buddha | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 35 KB JPG avoided 12/01/22(Thu)09:46:04 No.71209593 do you believe buddhas teaching? >women are evil >women are not capable of reaching nirvana or being spiritual >women are part of maya and the material world and should be View Thread

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Anon tries to be a business man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous P--- B PEAK OF APPRO 08/14/18(Tue)18:25:22 No.777182678 51 KB JPG Younger me is f------ up my present life. >college student >Comes home for summer Grip >Cleans old high school room so it doesn't look like s----- highschool room >finds old flash drive from when I was in middle school >Plugs it in >Finds s--- ton of pictures of a little boy naked and posing >W-- >Realizes the kid in pictures are younger me >Finds word document >"Hello anon, glad to see you again. Take these pictures and sell them online to make bank. It's not illegal because it's if you and you are now of conserving age. Please buy Xbox." >Destroy flash drive >Cringe so f------ hard

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Where is Anon’s big titty NEET gf? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1.97 MB WEBM Where is my NEET gf at? 9 Replies / 3 Images 11/30/22(Wed)23:01:20 No.71207552 View Thread : Anonymous >>71207552 (OP) # I meet a neet girl when i was 16 years old (2016), crushed on her so hard. Never talked to her and probably never going to meet her again. Its over. 11/30/22(Wed)23:10:58 No.71207671 Anonymous >>71207552 (OP) # >Where is my NEET gf at? Contemplating suicide Anonymous >>71207582 # >woman >opinion discarded 11/30/22(Wed)23:12:19 No.71207686 Anonymous >>71207552 (OP) # where is my smart girlfriend willing to force me to learn computer science at? 11/30/22(Wed)23:13:26 No.71207701 11/30/22(Wed)23:14:59 No.71207712

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Anon goes to Japan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 361 KB JPG 13 Replies / 5 Images : Anonymous 8 KB JPG 02/17/20(Mon)22:28:33 >"So, what brings you to Japan, anon-san?" >"Another English teacher? *snort*" No.56782521 View Thread 02/17/20(Mon)22:52:47 No.56782938 >>56782521 (OP) # >"no I came to get an autograph from you I'm a big fan and loved your work in 'Schoolgirl A--- Inferno"

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anon goes to the movies | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/17/19(Thu)22:02:50 No.790268566 36 KB JPG >be me at the movies after a pretty s--- day (that dragon ball super broly movie btw) >random guy sits beside me since there's nowhere for his whole family to sit together >he's loaded with snacks >"hey anon do you want some of this popcorn and snacks? i'm not gonna be able to eat all of it" (i take that s--- obviously i'm a fatass) >anytime i ran out of popcorn he always gave me more since he had refills, even when the movie was over he asked if i wanted anymore thanks random movie guy

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anon has a cool hair cut | /r/Greentext

File: 009B27A5-AE71-45BC-8285-C(...).jpg (41 KB, 615x511) Fix L-A, 1, 4, Remples of facial injortes Anonymous 12/01/22(Thu)17:58:03 No.889999919 [Reply] ► >>890000156 Am I ugly? >> Anonymous 12/01/22(Thu)18:00:27 No.890000156 ► >>889999919 (OP) Pretty cool haircut at the back for olden days. It's not all bad.

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Anon is gay for Andrew Tate | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1.23 MB PNG 1 Reply / 1 Image Anonymous 11/30/22(Wed)23:03:48 No.71207588 You are CEO of Yourself, and you are doing a bad job. Watch Andrew Tate motivation videos on YouTube. Arte Chigim Pepe 142 KB PNG View Thread 11/30/22(Wed)23:05:49 No.71207618 >>71207588 (OP) # >Watch Andrew Tate motivation videos on YouTube then you'll be stuck in an endless cycle of consuming content and fantasizing about action as a way to give yourself dopamine hits instead of actually doing anything with your life. its not that hard, make your room, take care of your hygene, go to the gym and have a good diet. pretty simple stuff you don't need andrew tate screaming at your face to do something with your life, and if you do need that you'll never do anything with your life to begin with

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