Is life a simulation? | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

128,0 kB PNG >playing a single player shooter game >spend the entire playthrough hoarding all the primo ammo types and never using them >only use the s-------- weapons and ammo because "I might need the good stuff later" >complete the final mission >suddenly realize I got through the whole game without ever having fun with the coolest weapons in it >realize I'm doing the same thing with my actual life

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon's autism kicks in | /r/Greentext

>go to work >see back door is pried open >see safe is broken open and the money's gone >get scared and don't know what to do 64 KB JPG >manager finally comes into work >OH MY GOD ANON WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL THE COPS >say I was scared and didn't know if it was worth bothering them about >AAAAAAAAA WE HAVE TO CALL THE COPS >cops come and they talk with the manager >for some reason they want to talk to me >they want me to give them my address for some reason >get scared that they think I might be a suspect >give them a fake address >they ask me more questions about my work >get scared and blurt out I DIDN'T DO IT >he writes something into his notepad and says he'll talk to me later >manager mad at me for some reason and wants me to go home >tfw realize I'm now a suspect >tfw might go to jail and get r---- for something I didn't do Should I just commit suicide to avoid the trouble?

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Anon does not like boring YouTubers | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG 05/20/22(Fri)23:48:11 No.68714289 >hey guys it's critical >today we are taking yet another clip from my live stream of me watching a youtube video that somebody else made and getting a million views for what little I add in words with my boring dry tired voice >also, for comedic effect, I will stretch the image on the youtube thumbnail for the billionth time >please laugh

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Not all heroes wear capes | /r/Greentext

Megalon3.png 85 KB PNG >go to a club in vrchat >a huge t---- dragon girl and a cat girl are groping each other and kissing >a f------ dude runs over as this guy >screams 'I AM MEGALON' >crashes the map

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Anon is going to a bar | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 19 KB PNG 09/28/22(Wed)09:59:59 No.70383293 >26 got new jobby job 2 months ago after 10 years neet >8pm >need to get up at 6 tomorrow for college >there's a female there who i havent interacted with before because she work in a remote office >she's 20 and hubba hubba >havent talked to a female in literally over a decade, mom dead sister ghosted me >havent been to a bar so i dont know what beer to ask for f--- i hate life 3 Replies >have to go to bar with collyigues in 3 hours View Thread

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anon goes biking | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 82 KB JPG 09/28/22(Wed)13:25:05 No.70383536 >be me yesterday >riding bike in the dark >almost hit a guy taking out his trash "Turn your flashlight on!" "I don't have one!" "Get one!" >yea sure, tf am I gonna need a flashligh for anyway? >crash into pole a few minutes later >mfw 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Green Text and Ham | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/03/21 (Sun)20:40:20 No.5177032 >>5177059 >>5177421 >>5177648 >>5178167 >You WILL eat them in a box >You WILL eat them with a fox >You WILL eat them in a house >You WILL eat them with a mouse >You WILL eat them here or there >YOU WILL EAT THEM EVERYWHERE

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Anon's pussy doesn't like pussy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 16 KB JPG 09/21/22(Wed)11:23:16 No.7029802 >A female cat had to stay with me for a few hours today >My cat was visibly stressed out >He retreated into a corner and hissed at her until she left him alone He is literally me

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Anon is from the Land of Freedom (and cars) | /r/Greentext

Average Day in the Life of an (...) C 127 KB JPG 08/21/22(Sun)11:19:56 No.391967036 >Wake up in termite infested apartment >Pray to American flag for good fortune >Text from my boss says I have to come in for unpaid overtime because he's understaffed >Can't have breakfast because my landlord drank the last of the milk >Leaving the apartment I see a notice from the Hoa saying I will be fined if I don't put up my Official Coca-Cola™ Frosty the Snowman™ Light- Up Inflatable Christmas Decoration TM >Love that community spitit >Can't take my car to work because it got repossessed after I missed the 300th monthly installment of $499.99 >Cant walk to work because it's illegal >Have to take my wife's boyfriend's bicycle instead >On the way I see a woman shovelling dead children out of the local school >"Again?" I ask >She shrugs and says "Shall not be infringed." >As I'm turning onto 6379.53rd Street, I get driven off the road by a five (imperial) ton pickup truck billowing black smoke >A man wearing a camouflage shirt, camouflage cargo pants, camouflage boots, camouflage gloves and a camouflage cap with a camouflage American flag on it leans out of the window >"THE ROAD IS FOR CARS, F-----!" >Thank him for his service >An old woman finds me lying in a pool of my own blood >I beg her not to call an ambulance, but she doesn't seek English >Half way to the hospital they realise I don't have insurance and they kick me out on the freeway >Tip them with the $300 I keep on my person at all times >Crawl the rest of the way to the hospital >Don't have any money left to tip the doctors, so they spit in my IV >Get a text from my boss saying I'm fired because I missed the morning cheer >Nurse hands me a bill for $3,000,000 and a month's free trial of Opiodol™ >Salute the American flag on the way out >Get shot by the police for moving my hand too quickly >Thank Jesus that I was born in the only free country in the world

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Anon will never cook for bitches again | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/19/22 (Mon)08:47:45 No.18372420 >>18369691 # Not cooking for bitches ever again, they all talk how they like cooking then bitch when I have them peel potatoes for dinner. >OHH lets just order pizza and f--- till it come teheheh F---. OFF.

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Annon is a ladies man | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 38 KB JPG 09/28/22(Wed)12:08:17 No.68476143 >be me >In class >qt nearby >She jokingly takes a fighting stance (invisible lat syndrome" and says "I'll be at you up" >Reply "haha I'll kill you" >She never speaks to me again

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Anon is parented by 4chan | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 23 KB JPG 09/28/22(Wed)06:27:10 No.886402330 >be me >neet who stays up late watching movies and browsing 4chan >go outside at 2 am to get some fresh air >see a girl -- around 20 years old walking on my street alone >remember a post I saw on 4chan saying to chase girls at night >idea.jpg >start walking the same direction as her on the other side of the street >cross over to her side >she keeps looking over her shoulder at me >I speed up >she speeds up >I start to jog >she starts to sprint >she trips and takes a pretty nasty fall >she starts to cry >I run back to my house >my heart is racing for the next two hours >felt good >will do it again if the opportunity presents itself 21 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon gets touched by a female | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 66 KB PNG 09/28/22(Wed)19:15:02 No.70381626 >don't shower for a week >balls and d--- start to smell horrid >rub money on my balls and d--- >go to mall where I know the cashiers are female >pay >female touched my balls and d--- What's something DEVILISH that you do, Anon? 18 Replies / 7 Images View Thread

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