: Anonymous 82 KB JPG 08/16/22(Tue)08:02:53 No.69832339 >play tf2 all day >decide to go to bed >lying in bed, hear faint voice >'that right there wasn't gettin any lighter' >w--.jpg >must have been the wind >"MEEEDDDDICC" "DOC CMON MAN" "3..2..1.. START FIGHTING!" >terrified >get up from bed >launch tf2

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is a doctor | /r/Greentext

Anonymous I'm ready to do surgery 757 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)18:47:17 No.884001453 >be me, 24m, high school dropout >jobless, living with parents >walking home from grocery store and see an old woman fallen over, blood everywhere >hide behind a wall until somebody else sorts the situation out >people come and bandage her up and call her an ambulance >when clearly the situation has been handled and an audience, has gathered, I run over >"I'm a doctor, what seems to be the problem" >audience members gasp with delight >"thank god you're here" >act like I know my s--- until the ambulance arrives >help carry woman into ambulance and then say goodbye and wish her luck >go home >mfw the next day i'm on the front cover of the local newspaper >"Hero doctor saves injured elderly woman" I could actually be a doctor with no training the only things you have to do are say you're a doctor and prescribe people whatever tf they want

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Friendly Fire | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous RE SA SHOOT ME $12 15 KB JPG 08/16/22(Tue)09:24:45 No.69832483 >go to store >there's a screen hooked to a security camera >some dude is on a screen >"awfully brave of this guy to walk outside with that hairline and a posture like that" >wait a minute >it's me So yeah, I'm killing myself today View Thread

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anon gets the 4th wall ending | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 543509053 102,8 kB JPG 9 REPLIES 2 sa. önce >agree with the antagonist >die to him intentionally >uninstall game and tell everyone you finished it 6 İMAGES REPLY

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Anon tells the story of Aphrodite Kallipygos, the goddess with a beautiful butt

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anon tries to be nice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Dinosaurs 1.01 MB JPG 08/05/22(Fri)15:48:02 No.883319932 Happened earlier today >Be Me >Watching p--- >Get bored and decide to watch cam girls instead. >Have an account already with tokens and s---. >Click on hot girl with big t------ >After watching for a while I get an idea. >type in chat: "What's your favorite Dinosaur?" >Message pops up on her stream, and she thinks about it. >try's describing a stegosaurus before remembering what it's called. >she starts happily talking about how she used to go to the park with her dad as a kid, and pretend to search for dinosaur bones in the sand. >She looks sad after she finish the story. >She seems deep in thought. >She gets up and ends the stream. My autism wanted to know what dinosaurs online strippers liked, and instead I sent a cam-girl into depression over her poor current relationship with her father. 6 Replies / 4 Images View Thread

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Anon meets someone at the gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous * 290 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)19:10:32 No.67991793 >be me >somewhat shy >walking to the squat rack >from the corner of my eye, see the most beautiful man I've ever seen walking in the same direction >can literally see his 10-pack through his shirt >actcool.gif >keep on walking >so does he >reach squat rack >he's looking right at me >somehow, my shyness just disappears and some primal instinct kicks in, so I make eye contact and keep looking into the darkest, soul-melting eyes I've ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on >adrenaline kicks in, and without thinking, I move closer to him >he moves closer as well >in the heat of the moment, without even saying anything, I slowly go in for a kiss >my heart skips as many beats as humanly possible as I realise he does the same >suddenly, *bump* >mfw my head almost shattered the mirror trying to kiss my reflection Appreciate yourself anons. You're already beautiful exactly the way you are.

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Anon makes a deal with the demons | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/14/17(Fri)15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood 19 KB JPG >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?

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Anon doesn't like Ben | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous NOBODY CAME FOR ME 215 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)08:24:46 No.69829904 >came home late and drunk yesterday >walk past parents room >hear moaning >drunk af so I decide to listen very quick >hear dad role playing as the oldest son of our neighbors : Anonymous >mom keeps saying "f--- me Ben" obviously imagining my dad is him >go to my room >havent slept since and feel like doing pic related 08/16/22(Tue)10:11:33 No.69830568 Your parents are unironically bad people for having this sort of kink and especially indulging it.

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first comment best comment | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous V 61 KB JPG : Anonymous 14 KB JPG 08/15/22(Mon)15:07:11 No.67981881 >"Hey mind if I get a quick spot?" >"Uhh I don't think I can spot that much weight" H-have I made it? 08/15/22(Mon)15:08:34 No.67981901 >>67981881 (OP) # >OP doing bodyweight squats >>67982029 # >>67982042 # >>67982043 # >>67982047 # >>67982224 # >>67984006 # >>67984024 # >>67984151 # >>67984208 # >>67984453 # >>67984932 # >>67986199 # >>67986261 # >>67986444 # >>67987263 # >>67987861 # >>67987895 # >>67987969 # >>67988214 # >>67988223 # >>67988258 # >>67988519 # >>67988538 # >>67988573 #

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bigot bros rise up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 17hUHZIB >>391310714 # 08/16/22(Tue)06:52:06 No.391312913 >Whites: I don't care if you're gay, i just don't want the wine stuff being shoved down my childrens throats, that's all! >Leftist: RACIST BIGOT!! >Muslim: If you are gay, you deserve to be castrated and burned alive >Leftist: Diversity is our strength!!

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Anon gets topped | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 404 KB JPG 03/11/22(Fri) 10:17:58 No.24812242 grindr >Got extremely sick a few weeks later >HIV test just came back HIV positive I should kill myself huh? : Anonymous >MtF >Wanted to try the BBC meme so hooked up with some guy on 03/11/22 (Fri)10:18:24 No.24812251 03/11/22 (Fri)10:18:49 No.24812256 Anonymous Component Results HIV Ag/Ab combo Your Value Reactive Standard Range Non Reactive HIV-1 p24 Ag detected. By Chemiluminescent Microparticle Immunoassay General Information Ordered by MD Collected on 03/09/2022 2:53 PM (Blood) Resulted on 03/09/2022 8:24 PM Result Status: Final result 1625726061870.png 99 KB PNG >>24812242 (OP) # And I already know people will say I'm LARPing if I don't post the results, so here. Go ahead and laugh

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anon wants a brother or 2 | /r/Greentext

Ben NL brother i want to be in a brotherhood BR see fren 13:31 08/16/22(Tue)13:30:16 No.69831736 does anyone here also wish to be in a brotherhood. i have one brother that i really love but he moved out so i see him very rarely and i really want the feeling of having brothers you can trust and are a priority to you. i fantasize sometimes about being adopted by someone and telling me that he adopted 5 other people to form a brotherhood and then having 5-8 brothers that care about me. anyone else have this fantasy hug fren 7 KB JPG 14% View Thread

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