anon pitches a rule63 script | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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no shit anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: R05iEaAu 50 KB PNG 07/25/22 (Mon)17:27:36 No.15803819 Maybe oversharing my deranged thoughts with strangers on the internet all day isn't the best use of my time. 5 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon gives you a legitimate reason to go to the Gym | /r/Greentext

5462464262.jpg 24 KB JPG THERE IS A MAN IN A CAVE THAT IS TRAINING FOR THE DAY THAT HE HAS TO FIGHT YOU. HE HAS NO RUNNING WATER NO MEDICINE NO GYM AND NO GF. SOMEDAY YOU WILL FACE HIM IN THE FIELD OF BATTLE AND IF YOU DO NOT TRAIN FOR THAT DAY HE WILL DEFEAT YOU. WHILE YOU SHITPOST ON THE INTERNET AND MASTURBATE TO CHINESE CARTOONS AND CONSUME THRICE YOUR DAILY CALORIC REQUIREMENT, THE MAN IN THE CAVE CONTINUES TO PREPARE FOR THE INEVITABLE DAY OF BATTLE.

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Anon 'un-pronouns' a girl | /r/Greentext

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An apple a day | /r/Greentext

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Anon encounters a future man. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 149 KB PNG 07/28/22(Thu)18:17:13 No.882843590 >be me, years ago >2017 >in mall shopping for candles >hear a guy humming, sometimes singing a song that sounds catchy >searching everywhere for the song >pretty clearly heard some of the lyrics he was muttering to himself, still wasn't enough to find it >eventually forget about it and move on >2020 >hear that exact song while browsing the internet >"Blinding Lights" by The Weeknd >vividly remember, it was this exact song the man was singing >feelsgoodman >check release date >2019 Did I encounter a time traveler?

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anon reads the harry potter books | /r/Greentext

No.132072243 rereading the Harry Potter books made me realize Harry was pretty dumb tbf >there is a troll on the loose in the castle and Anonymous 07/28/22(Thu)09:54:18 Hermione is in the bathroom? better go there instead of telling McGonagall or Dumbledore or any teacher or prefect >takes part in the triwizard tournament because muh goblet's magical license agreement or some s--- despite him not putting his name in it so he could've said "nah Im not doing this s---. you wanna force me? will that goblet magically make my head explode if I dont participate?" >misses pajeeta p---- because he has a crush on a girl he talked to twice last year and because Ron is a jealous sperg >doesnt ask out the cute autistic outcast girl despite being an outcast in most of his life while growing up with the Dursleys, probably could've gotten along best with Luna out of all (2) of his girlfriends >dates his best friend's sister which is a major NO because if they break up with heat it endangers his friendship with Ron >does all the s--- in sixth year Dumbledore asks and never tells him "listen here old man, what's the actual deal?" >Slughorn is the only person who knows how many horcruxes Voldemort made - doesnt suggest Dumbledore they should put veritaserum in Slughorn's ginger ale and ask him what's the secret number is >grew up among muggles but never suggests they should take out Voldemort with a Dragunov sniper rifle

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Anon likes critikal | /r/Greentext

File: wojakcritikal.png (177 KB, 340x468) Wait, you guys hate moistcritikal? Anonymous 07/28/22(Thu) >why do you guys hate charlie?

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Four Eyed Freak | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Sport 07/27/22 (Wed)23:37:29 No.69585104 >broke NEET McGRE AUG 2>Wear goofy glasses >Get job 433 KB PNG >Save up enough money to get contacts >Wear contacts to work >Qt assistant manager goes out of her way to be around me >Wind up getting her number >Go to the liquor store after work >Qt at the register says it was hard to tell I had nice eyes with my glasses Bros get rid of your glasses and get contacts

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Anon was a clueless 9 year old | /r/Greentext

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Anon is reduced to dust | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ITT times your gainz have been(...) Do I even lift? 12/07/17(Thu)10:08:39 No.43865956 >be me >been hitting the gym really hard past few weeks and feelin beefy >go to get a physical/flu shot from dr >he tells me to take my shirt off >"guess its pretty clear you aren't afraid of needles huh!" 18 KB JPG >oh haha i get comments like that alot but I'm actually natural and just have a strict lifting regime >blankstare.jpg >"I was talking about your tattoo, it's very obvious you aren't on steroids" So who crushed your self-esteem this week? 12 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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anon can't contain himself | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 129 KB JPG 07/26/22(Tue)18:45:27 No.69566652 >guys how do I stop giggling when I hear people fart >I'm 28

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Anon writes 9 paragraph long argument on reddit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/28/22(Thu)09:02:13 No.69583568 48 KB JPG > be me > pretty much a normal guy > friend tells me to install reddit and create an account > dont usually use social media > whatever, install that s--- and enter in a political discussion > write a f------ 9 paragraphs long well written text full of arguments politely answering some gentleman question > gets downvoted to oblivion > random f----- replies "the holocaust is real tf u on about" > 900 updoots and 3 awards why there is so many retards on that s-------?

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