anon is about to commit a crime | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 22 40 KB JPG go insane 06/24/22 (Fri)18:29:47 No.880757323 >take a s--- >wipe until the paper comes clean >later on >feel an itch in the ass >go to bathroom to wipe >there is s--- on the paper it's the little things that make you

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon loves thy neighbor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 71 KB PNG 06/24/22(Fri)21:59:51 No.880773026 >be me >actual f-- >live in not so well off area >have "blood gang" neighbors >they always sit outside and talk about the hood, crimes, weed, prison >I download grinder one horny night and get a DM >its the neighbor >600ft away >scared to not respond >he asks me to give him head >tell him im a masc top >he wants to j------- together >tell him im into more feminine men, sissys, trans etc >he stops DMing >hear my bell ring and knock on door >heart stops for a sec >look out peephole >its the neighbor >tells me "come on" hes horny >i tell him im not comfortable with the situation >threatens to kill me if i tell anyone he came over >fast forward to the day i move out >see neighbor out with "blood" friends >roll down my window and tell him ill miss eating his chocolatey ass and cuddles >hear his friend go "yooo B what the f--- is going ooon" >they all start laughing >he is p----- as f--- >drive into sunset >happy ending

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Anon Suspect The Wrong Person | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous why are you S------- on myplate? How do you Inte Ship 24 06/25/22(Sat)09:45:20 No.880766772 >be me >neighbor's dog keeps s------- in my grass >keep having to pick up it's s--- >neighbor keeps denying and lying about it 78 KB JPG >set up security camera >going to bring the evidence to the police >4am >motion detected >check camera >80 year old man who lives across the street >pulls down pants >mfw >apologize to neighbor

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Anon Likes Star Wars | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)11:08:54 No.581852657 >specifically designed to kill Jedi 97 KB JPG : Anonymous >not even one Jedi was killed by it 12/17/21(Fri)11:10:32 No.581852794 your penis was designed to reproduce yet not even one girl has been f----- by it >>581852882 # >>581852907 # >>581853461 # >>581853567 # >>581853720 # >>581853840 # >>581854234 #

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Anon isn't too happy about his friend's gf | /r/Greentext

index.jpg.png 900 KB PNG >that one friend who got a gf and now tries to integrate her into your gaming group >keeps saying we don't talk to her enough

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Anon Likes Poetry | /r/Greentext

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Making a good impression 101 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 48 KB JPG 06/25/22(Sat)02:29:00 No.69170114 >be me >at work >casual day >hear that we got a new colleague >she's a 9/10 shortstack >Im literally bricked up >time to exchange names >she arrives at my desk and starts to introduce herself >says her name is "Candice" >after hearing it, my mind goes in a fight or flight scenario >imagining the worst: she saying "candice these nuts fit in your mouth" >with lightning fast reflexes I don't let her finish and counter-attack >my name is Phil... THIS D--- IN YER MOUTH >she looks at me in disgust and leaves >she's currently in the boss' office Am I gonna get demoted?

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Anon has been tricked and backstabbed. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/27/21 (Mon)06:09:24 No.572380692 1612225502635.jpg 16 KB JPG >>572362878 # >f--- coworker >suddenly half the building knows I have a 4 inch penis and i'm a big f------ joke to everyone why the f--- did i do that >>572387069 # >>572394372 #

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Anon isn't taken seriously | /r/Greentext

02/05/22(Sat)10:38:44 No.872089694 I met a drunk girl at the bar and I went back to her apartment. She was on top and I told her to get off because I was going to c-- and she said "it's fine just do it, c-- inside me" I told her no and to get off but she just rode harder and kept saying "c-- for me" over and over. I tried to get her off me but I couldn't. What do I do now? Was I r----? : Anonymous 48 KB JPG : Anonymous >>872089694 (OP) # No 02/05/22(Sat)10:41:18 No.872089772 : Anonymous 02/05/22(Sat)10:42:28 No.872089809 You're gonna be r---- by Family Court if she pops out a little you.

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Anon commits a crime for a cause | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/24/22(Fri)15:41:14 No.880745570 >be me >absolutely abhor pedophiles >see a free spot on the darkweb market place >think real long and hard >grab jars >grab bleach, water, and food colouring >mix it all together 28 KB JPG >pour it into jars >market them as, "Real Loli Bath Water" >sell it for like 250$ a pop >advertise piss filled ones for about 450$ >kek im getting paid to poison pedophiles >f--- you pedophiles, go burn in hell from drinking my poison you stupid bastards wanted to post cause i really f------ hate pedophiles and they all should die

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Clashing narratives | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Benadryl ALLERGY Diphenhydramine HCI 25mg | Antihistamine Runny Nose Throat Seeing Oy ULTRATARS wat 24 TABLETS 98 KB JPG 11/05/21(Fri) 18:56:46 No.66040279 Anyone here ever abused allergy medicine? >700 mg benadryl >pick up phone to play clash of clans >spend 30 minutes on my village >phone vanishes >phone was upstairs the whole time >feel like utter shet for a week afterwards

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Anon Finds the Worst Place on the Internet | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 35 KB JPG 03/11/21(Thu)09:09:02 No.849327632 >get in argument with friend about worst places on the internet >I say this bored >he links me this https://www.reddit.com/r/FemaleDati ngStrategy/ and i thought you f------ where spiteful 23 Replies View Thread

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 85 KB JPG 08/12/19(Mon)23:13:42 No.53881727 >finally got my first boyfriend >ready to dust off the old hole and open up for business for the first time ever >he won't do it >am I ugly? >am I nasty? >what's wrong? >he's busy unpacking in his new apartment >decide to surprise him with lunch >sneak in, luckily the door was unlocked >hear groaning >hm >take a peek into his bedroom >he's face first into a pillow while a MASSIVE black guy is f------ the s--- out of him Brb, killing myself

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