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: Anonymous (ID: FUFqqcT1 We overestimated Russia 02/25/22(Fri)20:17:53 No.363392317 russianmilitary.jpg 29 KB JPG I thought they had a decent military? This is so scooby doo s--- here. If this was what my country gave me to assault another country I would straight up desert. in

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: Anonymous 10/26/24(Sat) 10:58:14 No.204864976 maxresdefault (3).jpg 73 KB JPG >you're gaslighting me! >you're love bombing me! >you're stonewalling me! >you're mansplaining to me! realistically, how do you respond to this?

GE Anonymous "I will refund 11/27/24(Wed)23:23:27 No.695792406 Valve Just Put Game Publishers On Notice. 1.1M views 5 days ago Bellular News your game." aa 17:58 IMG_7847.jpg 332 KB JPG >DUDE, IM THE WHOLESOME VIDEO GAME SANTA, WE DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT MONEY LMAO >destroys indie devs by forcing them to accept refunds even though the small game they released was literally under the 2 hour threshold for playing and being able to refund F--- Gabe. He's a scumbag. Anonymous >>695792406 (OP) # 11/27/24(Wed)23:25:51 No.695792505 The customer is ALWAYS right >>695793068 # >>695794602 # >>695795310 # Anonymous >>695792406 (OP) # 11/27/24(Wed)23:26:12 No.695792525 If your game is s----- enough that even people who bought it on steam instead of pirating demands a refund it's your fault Anonymous 11/27/24(Wed)23:26:42 No.695792549 Be thankful for Gabe. The second he dies, a brainless profitbot 9000 takes his place, undoes everything he did, and guts Valve like a fish for private equity wealth.

Anonymous 89KB JPG 01/18/20(Sat) 12:25:09 No.818739837 >be me >been having a s--- week >take long shower >lay on back buck naked on bed and close eyes >try not to cry >feelsbadman.jpg >doggo snoozing on bed suddenly wakes up and stretches >Starts walking over my legs but stops over my genitals >shakes head and violently slaps my d--- and balls multiple times with floppy ears >laugh uncontrollably for 5min straight Instantly feel better. Thanks doggo bro.

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The average 4chan user gets a job | /r/Greentext

Just got a job >20 year old autist >working drive through at mcdonalds >"I'll have 2 chicken sandwiches 1 with no tomato" >"which one do you not want tomato on?" >some brief silence and a muffled sound >"either one, man" >messed up their change tto0

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Anon was outraged | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)18:36:55 No.153753695 1626497257478.jpg 217 KB JPG >wow you're so much bigger than my exes Literally turned 360 degrees and walked right out of the cinema : Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)18:46:21 No.153754047 If you turned 360 degrees you'd still be facing the cinema.

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7000 members and now I'm officially 1 ton | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/15/20(Tue)04:56:18 No.842375793 >get mod on a discord server with over 1000 members >instantly gain 300 pounds >mfw 9 KB JPG

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anon is waiting | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: SYKALAIC ) 02/24/22(Thu)00:12:32 No.362800779 I will sit here and shitpost on the funny politics board until an explosion directly hits my apartment and kills me instantly 33 KB JPG

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Guilty as charged | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:05:46 No.719447132 ITT: Pretend we're reddit 51 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:08:03 No.719447353 >s----- film reference >gay dad joke "'WOW thanks for the gold guys, lets all meet up and have a massive o--- because of how perfect we all are' >>719447581 # >>719447619 # >>719447968 # : Anonymous 01/18/17(Wed)23:10:29 No.719447581 >>719447353 # /thread

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anon's school was worried about his comic strip | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)00:56:04 No.67308084 back in high school they sent me to the school's psychologist because my teacher found my comics notebook and they thought I was going to kill myself or something like that. I still believe those comics were really funny, specially the ping pong chad and the backflip abortion 45 KB JPG ones. I think that day my creativity died because I didn't draw comics since, I felt so judged despite it being created only for comical purposes : Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)00:59:04 No.67308105 >>67308084 (OP) # What kind of comics were they anyway and why your teacher got panicked with them? >>67308283 # : Anonymous 02/06/22(Sun)01:18:05 No.67308283 >>67308105 # I think that the one that worried them was "ping pong chad", it might look long but it isn't, goes like this: 13 KB PNG >ugly manlet approaches stacy and says "umm hey susan, I liked you since elementary school, I wondered if we could maybe go a date this weekend and get to know eachot.." Stacy interrupts him and says "yeah whatever I'm not dating you, bag of dog c--" >superbuffed chad appears on the scene and says "hey bitch want to see how many ping pong balls can I fit in my foreskin?" and stacy replies "OMG Chad yesss!" "ugly manlet gets choleric and grabs a pistol and starts shouting "I'm tired of this, you all always ignore me and treat me like s---, now I will kill myself and you're coming with me, you will know the fear and suffering I feel everyday!" >chad says "not so fast, incel freak!" and expulses a ping pong ball at high speed out of his foreskin, conviniently hitting the guy's belt and thus letting his pants fall, showing that he was wearing women's underwear >everyone starts laughing and the incel ends up having a mental breakdown, saying things like "god no woman will ever love me, I condemned to solitude and pain". He finally blows his head withn a the gun and dies >the final panel shows chad being praised by a multitude saying "yay you saved us chad!" while he keeps doing tricks with his foreskin and the ping pong balls

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Anon figures out life | /r/Greentext

ttom] [Update] [ Auto] jng (18 KB, 389x389) IAnonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.

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Anon meets a woman. | /r/Greentext

>Be me 25 y/o 6ft man >Looking for a house to rent >l dress business casual, looking professional >walk into a house tour >Cute 4.5ft tall asian milf, probably in her mid 40s is showing the place >at first, she looks a little scared and 499 KB JPG shows me everything quickly >Understandable, it's just the both of us there >l walk behind her, she kinda thicc doe > She is barefoot >All Can think of is how good that ass feels and how good her feet smell and taste > hard as f--- >tuck in d--- onto my waist band/belt while she isn't looking >she asks me some questions about me, habits, job, normal house renting stuff >she seems interested in me renting since I got my s--- together >While talking, all I can think in my mind is how easy it would be for me to pin her down on the floor >Rip her clothes off and furiously f--- her, stretching her tiny tight p---- >Perhaps she could read my mind, I felt great sexual tension >she asked me about my gf >I say That Currently I'm dating around, no gf >"oh wow, but you real handsome! Big and strong haha you look like a quarterback " >l giggle and say thank you >her body position and the way she looked at me had me thinking she wanted me to pin her down and f--- her too. >sadly, I had to leave and I gave her my contact info to send me the app >I went to my car, drove to a nearby target parking lot and fapped and bursted c-- into a water bottle >the house got rented the next day Now I have the yellow fever. I need asian p----!

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Anon preaches truth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: xphr6pDr 02/26/22(Sat)00:03:59 No.363276688 How the f--- did we even enter this timeline? 54 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: TdgXv8Ru 02/26/22(Sat)00:04:50 No.363276898 >>363289134 # : Anonymous (ID: BK5MİZAD 02/26/22(Sat)00:08:34 No.363277792 >>363276688(OP) # Harambe >>363277917 # >>363278593 # >>363278703 # >>363279999 >>363289202 #

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Ukraine's True Secret Weapon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: FVTbi9q9 ) 02/25/22(Fri)13:31:28 No.363200924 obraz_2022-02-25_133028.png 45 KB PNG >>363200545 # The real ghost of Kiev

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Anon makes a recovery | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/06/19(Sun)20:52:24 No.789321110 >be me, 23yo, shy c--- >spent three years in a toxic relationship being constantly emotionally abused >ex dumped me for some swaggot couple years back because he was a f------- and got bored of me >apparently ended poorly (who would've thought?) 11 KB JPG >texted me some time back that she missed me and how I always treated her well and pampered her and how she's sorry fuckthatnoise.mp3 >left her on read and moved on, still feeling a bunch of inner turmoil >ran into her at local market today >she came up to me (even though I did my best to avoid her) >tries initiating conversation >something inside me gets ignited >"I'm sorry, do I know you?" >she's confused and goes "are you f------ kidding, it's me, xxxxxx" >"Ooh, s---, I didn't recognize you! THAT'S what you look like now? Talk about dodging a f------ bullet." >l walk off without saying anything else to her >saw her walking out bawling her eyes out >I feel closure and empowerment, anons >I think I'm ready for the dating scene again

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Anon is a historian. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 6lrNIHp6 ) EE 02/25/22(Fri)13:25:57 No.363210781 >be russia >claim to re-establish soviet union >claim to have a super power army >invade the crippled neighbour next door >??? 537 KB PNG >abt 2000 losses in two days and failing almost all of their objectives Jesus f--- how can Russia and vatniks f--- up so bad? I mean Putin most cope right now and he even wants to start peace talk in Minsk.

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Greentext Stories - Anon on the Russian mystery machine. | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous (ID: FUFqqcT1 We overestimated Russia 02/25/22(Fri)20:17:53 No.363392317 russianmilitary.jpg 29 KB JPG I thought they had a decent military? This is so scooby doo s--- here. If this was what my country gave me to assault another country I would straight up desert. in

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