anon faces big al | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 02/23/22(Wed)17:05:04 No.873252423 > be me > go on vacation to florida for 5 weeks > come back to my apartment to a terrible rat infestation > hear them scurrying the floors every night > able to get a few of them with mouse traps > hear one walking all big and slow > it's the last one of the rest > leave out a mouse trap > hear it walking during the night and then hear the clank of the mouse trap > wait a minute and go out of my room and take a look > see the cheese GONE and the metal snap of the trap bent > actually start laughing my ass off thinking i've gone crazy > leave another trap out > in the morning the second one is bent even more > what the f--- > leave out a camera because i'm actually dumbfounded by this > see this big f------ rat > he's literally a huge monster > if he was a human he'd be like 400 pounds > promptly name him "big al" > see on camera the trap snap on big al, big al eats the cheese, then just simply pushes it off and walks away like nothing happened > get idea > leave out a piece of cheese laced with rat poison > on the video see big al eat the cheese and walk away > sorry big al, it had to be this way > next night i hear heavy scurrying > check my camera > BIG AL IS STILL F------ ALIVE > get a huge piece of cheese, put bleach in it, rat poison, and lighter fluid (the lighter fluid is important) > big al eats it and walks off > BIG AL WONT. F------. DIE. > 5 minutes after i stop watching the camera i hear a pop then this weird like squealing noise > open my bedroom door and see big al on fire jumping around my living room > freak out and throw my chair at big al > he's flat on the ground while on fire > put him out > think i've finally killed big al >i see him slowly start standing up > smash big al with a frying pan about 9 times > throw him out of my window > i'm sorry big al, may you rest easy convinced he was a bio weapon made to kill

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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