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Anonymous 9 minutes ago 788931223 >be me >at work >work next to a place with a lot of mexicans, most don't speak English >have to fart >qt 3.14 latina chick walking by >think "she doesn't speak English so she won't understand my fart" >fart VERY LOUD >she looks at me in disgust >mfw I realize how f------ autistic I am

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Anonymous DIS-Avowed 11/27/24(Wed)05:30:27 No.695700 VIDEO GAMES 'Avowed' Art Director Matt Hansen Admits To Wanting To Make Elon Musk "Mad" And Hint Game Is Ultra Woke JOHN F. TRENT NOV 26, 2024 - PAID 3 D1 ~ OBSIDIAN MATT_HANSEN ART DIRECTOR OBSIDIAN ENTERTAINMENT OBSIDIAN Matt Hansen the art director for Xbox and Obsidian Entertainment's upcoming fi person fantasy RPG admitted that he wanted to make Elon Musk "mad" with the game. 75486787548769.png 294 KB PNG >"I will make it political just to make chuds mad" >"And i achieved it! i made people mad" >"F--- chuds!" >"Win!" >"W-wait... what's that? my game flopped?!" >"Wait... there are layoffs in my studio? how-" >"P-people didn't like me trying to make them mad!" >"t-they are bigots!" >"F--- gamers! it's rough times for game developers man, this society is failing in so many levels it's unbelievable!" >"Y-you are laughing!, there are families involved and you are laughing!"

File: Screenshot 20241127-155712.png (228 KB, 742x721) Something Happened Anonymous (ID: HG6Lars) 11/27/24(Wed)17:35:15 No.489774321 ► >Polls all indicate a Harris victory, though close >Ann Selzer poll, known as a canary in a coal mine, indicated Harris winning lowa >Trump campaign suspiciously quiet nearing the end of the campaign >Harris campaign had significant energy >North Carolina predicted to be close >Virginia unusually red >The four countries willing and able to f--- with US democracy (Iran, China, Russia, NK) stand to benefit from a Trump win (cause it's destabilizing) >Billionaires cozy up to Trump despite a Harris victory being predicted >TRUMP WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 20 YEARS A REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >WITH AN APPROVAL RATING EQUIVALENT TO CANCER Bros, I'm telling you, something funky happened

☐ Anonymous 11/25/24(Mon) 10:39:13 No. 17295889 >>17295909 >>17295925 >>17295935 >>17295976 >win independence >DON'T devolve into military dictatorship or absolute monarchy >start off with fresh land and an unusually high literacy rate >neighbors are retarded savages who live at the mercy of nature >large ocean between them and European chimpouts >shitgoesdown.jpg >"here tovarish buy my land I need to fund a chimpout" >ok > "here America buy my land, I need to fund my own le chimpout" >ok >"hey America there was a chimpout in Texas we'll join you (and won't secede later) if you help" >ok >*doubles land in two years* It's amazing how well they took advantage of what they had. Many nations have completely fumbled the bag during their development. What went so right?

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Anon walks his dog | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/29/18(Tue)07:17:29 No.2702217 >Take dog for walk at night >College campus, come to a secluded little 51 KB PNG trail/garden area >Dog starts eating a patch of grass >Get onto all fours and start eating the grass alongside him to see if it tastes good >Doesn't >Get up >There was a couple sitting on a bench about 10 feet away that I somehow hadn't seen >Leave immediately without saying a word >>2703584 # >>2704534 #

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Anon is loved | /r/Greentext

06/09/21 (Wed)15:53:56 No.148386 >16 >last night >little sister comes in >she is 6 >tells me she is scared 118 KB JPG because of the storm outside >tuck her in >tell her a fairy tale >tells me l'm the best big brother and she loves me >tfw a girl said she loves me see ya later virgins

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Anon meets a black guy dressed like Peter Pan | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 6 hours ago 434656828 >1 in the morning >GF at the time wanted to get food and rent a movie to fool around to before bed >Stop by a redbox at a walgreens near her place >Black guy dressed like f------ Peter Pan or something pulls up to us in his car by the redbox >Figure, "oh s--- here we go, going to have to fight some nog" >"Nah y'all don't need to be paying for that now, f--- a redbox my dude" >Hands us a Wal-Mart bag filled with about 40 burnt disks with recent movie titles on them >Backseat is full of these bags >Go to shake his hand and say "Jesus man, thanks. What's your name?" >"Who me? Y'all can just call me... N---- ROBIN HOOD!" >Dude peels out of the parking lot and speeds off into the night >GF and I confused as f--- >Go home, put in the disks >About half of the movies are HD rips of what the disks says they are, other half are actually just filled to the brim with new brazzers scenes Unironically the most based dude I've ever met 6 REPLIES

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a short story by anon | /r/Greentext

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Anon has only one shot | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/09/21(Wed)21:49:15 No.64077770 >one shot at life >born an ugly female НАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАН ITS GREAT KNOWING NO MAN WILL EVER BE ATTRACTED TO YOU OR LOVE YOU 32 KB JPG 57 Replies / 11 Images View Thread

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Anon realizes a depressing thought | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/21/20(Sat)14:32:58 No.61025172 >sleep for 12+ hours >wake up at noon >refresh the same few websites over and over again >do absolutely f------ nothing >start and try to play video game 360 KB PNG >quit after a few minutes because i cant even force myself to have fun with it anymore >continue refreshing 4chan and youtube for hours again occasionally watching a few youtube videos that look interesting and that i havent seen yet >go to sleep feeling like a tired corpse even though i havent done anything is this even a life anymore?

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Anon has been browsing too many loli threads | /r/Greentext

File: trump.jpg (7 KB, 183x275) U Anonymous 06/09/21(Wed)20:32:45 No.856475362 ► >be me "be you?" >yes >be me "why?" >been browsing tons of loli threads on /b/ "b?" >yes, /b/ >and these threads...they're full of drawings of naked children... >these drawings are sick...disgusting...and yet...they are necessary... "sir, are you feeling all right?" >p--------- is not a sexuality...it is a sickness..but if these drawings can keep these sick, sick people from acting out their perverted fantasies on innocent children, we need to encourage these drawings...we have to spread the word about this... "sir, do you know where you are?" >i'm on /b/ "no, sir. you're in washington d.c. do you know who i am?" >yeah >probably some f------ normie redditfag "sir, my name is andres obrador. i am the president of mexico." >kamala finally speaks up "joe, for the last time, president obrador has come to the oval office to discuss our border policy. and you keep rambling about naked kid drawings. but whatever, f--- it, you're still better than pic related"

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Anon has an eventful time at the cinema | /r/Greentext

272d3f1985fbb13fd8701390f.) jpg (38 KB, 640x628) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 11/19/17(Sun)10:13:51 No.90452095 - >>90452267 >>90452385 >>90452451 >>90453024 >at cinema with dad >character says the word n----- >dad laughs out loud Anyone want to trade? B Anonymous EO Anonymous 11/19/17(Sun)10:15:34 No.90452144 v >>90452161 >>90452257 >>90452264 >>90452285 >>90452322 >>90452350 >>90452384 >>90452385 >>90452394 >>90452402 >>90452452 >>90452798 >>90452835 >>90452871 >>90453027 >>90453047 >>90453055 >>90453080 >>90453104 >at cinema with n----- >character says the word dad >n----- looks around in confusion

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Anon Has Aspergers | /r/Greentext

File: D202AMHWKAABF81.jpg (14 KB, 251x242) O Anonymous 06/09/21(Wed)23:23:19 No.856488781 >have aspergers heh >ass burgers

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Anon spills some milk | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/16(Tue)14:37:15 No.669211631 >>669207142 (OP) # >Be like a billion years ago >Every day get milk for lunch >F------ hate milk >End of lunchI would go to band instrument storage room and stash milk carton in cieling >Did this for about 6 months >One day in band class >F----- kid showing off to girls >Thinks hes athletic >"Bet you I can reach the cieling" >F----- smacks one of the cieling tiles and spills 6 month old chunky lemon milk everywhere >lt gets all over him and the girls >Just watching in amazement >Then the smell hits >Oh god the smell, I can still smell it to this day >I throw up from the smell >Another girl in back throws up, can see the spaghetti she ate only an hour ago >Band instructor clears out room, class canceled becausxe of smell, go play unreal tournament in library for an hour >f----- kid gets suspended for a few days >School has to replace entire cieling keked softly for a while >>669212133 #

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Anon wants a normie family. | /r/Greentext

O PLEASE HELP 06/09/21(Wed)19:59:12 No.24348162 >be me >depressed neet >somehow have a qt 3.14 girlfriend >one day find positive pregnancy test in the bathroom trash >confront girlfriend about it >she says not to worry she's getting an abortion >drive her to the abortion clinic the following week >sit with her in the waiting room >girl comes out in a wheelchair sweaty and crying >realize I don't want to put my girlfriend through that >tell girlfriend i want to have a normie family >she agrees >get my life together >start going to the gym >become a wagecuck >buy a small cozy house >buy a ring to propose >girlfriend has the baby few months later >baby is black >mfw Got my life together for a cheating w----. Never fall in love anons

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Anon tells another Anon's war story | /r/Greentext

05/23/21(Sun)18:16:32 No.49410797 A poster here told this one in a thread like this a few years back, I'll try to detail it as closely to his story as possible. >Be deployed to Iraq circa 2008 >Commander is a hard ass for ROE's, so much so it makes it impossible to carry out missions at times >Go out on patrol, stop in villages to give out Tootsie rolls and coloring books, hearts and minds s--- >Stop in a village, kids all gather around for their gibs >One little f-----, about 9 years old, manages to get ahold of a box of hand grenades somehow >He starts lobbing them and raising hell >Request permission to ice the little ackbar >denied.gif >Commander states anyone who engages the kid will be immediately court martialed upon return to the states >Tactical retreat >Return to the same village later on to give out more books and candy >Kid starts chunking grenades again, we leave without giving any of the coloring books or candy >One 6 year old is p----- he didn't get his Tootsie rolls, finds an AKM bayonet and stabs the grenade lobbing kid in the gut >Next time we're back we give the bayonet kid extra candy and books >Commander gets relieved of command when we get back to the states for his incompetence

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Greentext Stories - Anon works near the border | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 9 minutes ago 788931223 >be me >at work >work next to a place with a lot of mexicans, most don't speak English >have to fart >qt 3.14 latina chick walking by >think "she doesn't speak English so she won't understand my fart" >fart VERY LOUD >she looks at me in disgust >mfw I realize how f------ autistic I am

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