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>assigned to do a project with a co- worker >whenever we do some progress or get past a roadblock say the word "stupendous" >do it for a couple weeks >co-worker eventually starts picking it up 451 KB PNG >pavlov.png >co-worker starts saying stupendous as well in the same situations >stop saying it >ffw 1 month, project pretty much done >just cleared the last bug, co-worker says stupendous >allacordingtoplan.wav >"huh? that's an unusual expression" >"what do you mean, anon? I heard it from you" >"i never used that word in my life" see you soon on the board, fellow schizo

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Anonymous DIS-Avowed 11/27/24(Wed)05:30:27 No.695700 VIDEO GAMES 'Avowed' Art Director Matt Hansen Admits To Wanting To Make Elon Musk "Mad" And Hint Game Is Ultra Woke JOHN F. TRENT NOV 26, 2024 - PAID 3 D1 ~ OBSIDIAN MATT_HANSEN ART DIRECTOR OBSIDIAN ENTERTAINMENT OBSIDIAN Matt Hansen the art director for Xbox and Obsidian Entertainment's upcoming fi person fantasy RPG admitted that he wanted to make Elon Musk "mad" with the game. 75486787548769.png 294 KB PNG >"I will make it political just to make chuds mad" >"And i achieved it! i made people mad" >"F--- chuds!" >"Win!" >"W-wait... what's that? my game flopped?!" >"Wait... there are layoffs in my studio? how-" >"P-people didn't like me trying to make them mad!" >"t-they are bigots!" >"F--- gamers! it's rough times for game developers man, this society is failing in so many levels it's unbelievable!" >"Y-you are laughing!, there are families involved and you are laughing!"

File: Screenshot 20241127-155712.png (228 KB, 742x721) Something Happened Anonymous (ID: HG6Lars) 11/27/24(Wed)17:35:15 No.489774321 ► >Polls all indicate a Harris victory, though close >Ann Selzer poll, known as a canary in a coal mine, indicated Harris winning lowa >Trump campaign suspiciously quiet nearing the end of the campaign >Harris campaign had significant energy >North Carolina predicted to be close >Virginia unusually red >The four countries willing and able to f--- with US democracy (Iran, China, Russia, NK) stand to benefit from a Trump win (cause it's destabilizing) >Billionaires cozy up to Trump despite a Harris victory being predicted >TRUMP WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 20 YEARS A REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE WINS THE POPULAR VOTE >WITH AN APPROVAL RATING EQUIVALENT TO CANCER Bros, I'm telling you, something funky happened

☐ Anonymous 11/25/24(Mon) 10:39:13 No. 17295889 >>17295909 >>17295925 >>17295935 >>17295976 >win independence >DON'T devolve into military dictatorship or absolute monarchy >start off with fresh land and an unusually high literacy rate >neighbors are retarded savages who live at the mercy of nature >large ocean between them and European chimpouts >shitgoesdown.jpg >"here tovarish buy my land I need to fund a chimpout" >ok > "here America buy my land, I need to fund my own le chimpout" >ok >"hey America there was a chimpout in Texas we'll join you (and won't secede later) if you help" >ok >*doubles land in two years* It's amazing how well they took advantage of what they had. Many nations have completely fumbled the bag during their development. What went so right?

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Anon dodges homework by hacking the school | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)14:36:23 No.81740304 >be in 7th grade >group PP presentations due unironically on tech topics >powerpoints were to be saved in the class network drive >be lazy and do nothing in meme class with friend >first day of presentations 250 KB PNG >panic.html >recall network drive not having any rules >ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DELETE >yes >first group of girls go up, digging through the network drive to no avail >confusion for 20 minutes >uncontrollable giggle everytime i make eye contact with friend >teacher realizes everyones projects are gone and not backed up >ff to being pulled outside of the classroom with fellow retard >DONT LIE TO ME ANONS. DID EITHER OF YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS >literally puncturing tongue with teeth trying not to laugh >"No" >never even slightly worried about getting caught >continued to rename teacher folders throughout the year to obscene names and delete ones we didn't like >mfw

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Anon complains about mom stuff | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)17:27:58 No.63802231 >age 16 >fall asleep on the couch in an awkward position >mom takes a f------ picture of it >when I wake up she shows me >urge her to delete it >she promises she'll delete it 39 KB JPG >4 years later >sister makes a stupid collage of family photos >there is only one image of me and it's me sleeping >not only did she not delete it but she sent it to other people

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Anon lives in Brazil | /r/Greentext

File: artworks-000206371365-8mf(.).jpg (41 KB, 500x500) O Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)17:42:00 No.855094960 [Reply] >>855095549 >>855096901 be me > lives in brazil > have a happy life with your family > pandemic and quarantine started > wife don't gives a s--- to quarantine > wife and son dies from corona > spend christmas alone > get fired from your job > ž months rent late guys i don't know what i do now this is not a joke but a cry for help Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)17:45:51 No.855095170 >lives in brazil you didn't need to write the rest buddy

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anon is messaging evey single OF hoe | /r/Greentext

How do we solve the onlyfans problem? How do we solve the onlyfans p...) 05/20/21(Thu)22:06:20 No.63758950 Personally I'm messaging every single OF w---- that appears on my timeline and asking them if their parents know about it. If they don't then I stalk on their page a little bit and find their parents account on facebook, then shoot them a message explaining how their daughter is a common w----. So far l've done this 3 times. 39 KB PNG : Anonymous 05/20/21(Thu)22:16:50 No.63759092 >>63758950 (OP) # Absolutely 100% based. Don't forget to shoot the IRS some info too; online p---------- and/or prostitution must still be taxed and it usually isn't. Also, if these is a patreon, ko-fi or paypal donation/commissions link on their page, contact the site. Paypal (as well as patreon, ko-fi and the rest) is 100% against soliciting money for p---------- and prostitution. They take that VERY seriously, especially paypal. If you inform them that a client is taking money for nudes and stuff, they will quickly shut down their account AND freeze their assets. You can basically easily take away their w----- money, and it's not even illegal for you to do it - paypal is very serious about this. Don't warn or scare the w---- before you report them, because they might transfer their money before you get a chance to inform paypal. Godspeed brother. >>63759127 # >>63759789 # >>63760655 # >>63760720 # >>63761203 # >>63761631 # >>63762235 # >>63762905 # >>63765288 #

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Anon messes up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/04/17(Mon)23:06:31 No.744254245 > be me > 18yo > first b------- > feelsamazing > c--- buckets in her mouth > she swallows > your c-- tastes really bad anon 43 KB JPG > haha I know What have I done

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Anons based dad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)01:27:12 No.855085790 Can we get a based dad thread going on? >be me >4 years old >dad takes me to mcdonalds for chicken 20 KB JPG nuggies and fwench fwies >spot a group of fat women sitting in the corner of the lobby as we're waiting in line. >point and scream at the top of my lungs "LOOK DAD!! FAT PEOPLE!!" in an attempt to make my dad laugh. >dad let's out the absolute loudest cackle >all three women stare at us in shock >"shhhhhh anonnnn pshhddd you can't say that fffpphhh" with the biggest s--- eating grin on his face >one of the women starts crying, while the other two just sat there staring angrily at us >dad and I leave immediately >don't speak a word about it in the car, but the s--- eating grin is still very much present >go to Burger King drive thru instead One of my fondest memories of him tbh

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Anon invites a friend over | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: BbxYdjwH ) -E 05/19/21(Wed)04:48:12 No.12774839 >friend broke up >he asks if he can come to sleep in my place so he wouldnt be alone >i invite him over >without realising i dont have a 152 KB JPG spare mattress Pic related. Its me sleeping on my floor. Any tips on how to make it more comfortable? 14 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon needs to control his temper | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)06:30:36 No.63796085 >got fired from my last job for calling my boss a lazy p------------ >new job >have come extremely close to saying something similar to my new boss DVE 166 KB JPG How do I get in line and just accept my place as a wageslave? I cant keep losing jobs because of my tendency to speak my mind.

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Anon witnesses a rape dwarf/ravioli man crossover | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/22/21(Sat)22:34:03 No.855076140 >be me >jacking off alone >hear knock on door notagain.jpeg "COME IN" >hear door unlock 33 KB PNG >giggles THUMP THUMP THUMP >his c--- drags on the last step >he opens my door "Anon... I'm not here to r--- you, take some raviolis" >thanks r--- dwarf "Jk Imao" >bonk >knocked out >wake up with dwarf c-- in my ass

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Anon has the highground | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/23/21(Sun)17:51:42 No.855112209 > Working at IT department in bank > Company currently joined the woke-train and now we get all kinds of workshops on why straight white men are the devil > Roll eyes - none of the 1.48 MB GIF Directors/VPs are of color... > People start to insert moronic 'she/her' and 'his/him' to their signatures > Getting so annoyed by this, I insert 'they/them' in my signature > One of my colleagues (and one of the drivers behind this whole moronification of signatures) asks me about my signature > I reply "I don't think it's appropriate to talk about these things at work - please just respects my pronouns" > This person goes mad, accusing me of mocking the pronouns > I think "F--- it. No way for her to prove it", and step to HR to complain > Colleague is being asked to stop her questioning (and gets her first official warning), but still brings it up two more times > I go to HR again, she gets her second official warning > I'm enjoying that this moronic s--- is now biting the proponents in their ass > Again, she's alluding to my pronouns not being genuine during a meeting >I make a big scene of it (lulz), and HR gets involved again > Last Friday was her last day. So what have YOU been doing to make this world a better place?

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Everyone liked that. | /r/Greentext

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Anon introduces himself to his new girlfriend's mom. | /r/Greentext

>Be shy 17 year old >Meet girl at a party >She is pretty >Always wants to touch, sit on lap etc. >Party ends >She proposes to go on a walk 87 KB PNG >Agree, have small nice talk outside >She then asks me to come to her house >Yes23.jpg >Grsbs my hand, practically tows me to her house >Go in, have sex >Sweaty, go to her kitchen to grab drink >Her mom is there >Im naked >brain_shudown.gif >Grab her hand and say "Hello, my name is Anon" I will never forget

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Greentext Stories - anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

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>assigned to do a project with a co- worker >whenever we do some progress or get past a roadblock say the word "stupendous" >do it for a couple weeks >co-worker eventually starts picking it up 451 KB PNG >pavlov.png >co-worker starts saying stupendous as well in the same situations >stop saying it >ffw 1 month, project pretty much done >just cleared the last bug, co-worker says stupendous >allacordingtoplan.wav >"huh? that's an unusual expression" >"what do you mean, anon? I heard it from you" >"i never used that word in my life" see you soon on the board, fellow schizo

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