Anon realizes that depression is cringe | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)20:52:32 No.853820308 >be me >have deppression >go to hospital for suicidal thoughts >got meds that never worked 9 KB JPG >realize deppression is cringe >litteraly just decide to not have it anymore >mfw it f------ worked 1 Reply View Thread

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Board /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Anonymous (ID: DGIRKsep) F--- Cyclists ▼Settings Mobile Home 11/10/24(Sun)15:42:18 No.487999666 MET 508 KB PNG >"No, I will not get out of your way and ride on the pavement, that's against the highway code" >"You must stay behind my slow ass and if you dare pass me without giving me at least 1000 feet of space, I will capture you on my GoPro and report you to the authorities!" Proceeds to: >Ignore red lights >Ignore give way lines >Ignore stop signs >Check phone >Swerve everywhere like a drunk >Ignore busses pulling out (Rule 223) >Still rides on the pavement when its convenient They're like the little bureaucrats of the road.

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

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Anon makes a friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)18:10:52 No.63548834 >went to my local playground today to play and mingle >befriend a 6 yr old named Will >pretty chill kid >we talk about life and our hobbies >f------ roastie bitch calls the cops on me for being "creepy" 181 KB JPG >mfw I was just shooting the s--- with Will Why do roasties always spoil the fun? 1 Reply View Thread

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Anon realizes | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous (ID: CYaRgWDp 07/28/17(Fri)08:3 >>135275894 >>135276090 >>135276165 >>135277069 >>135278 >>135286564 >>135286951 >>135289136 >>135289396 >>135290 >Brother is a history teacher for kids in 5th grade >Told me he brought up 9/11 to his class >Said kids went instantly insane >They didn't know it was real >One kid said he thought it was just a meme

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Anon is a 65 year old man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/12/19(Tue)20:41:52 No.792468115 > be me, 65yo > be on the bus > bored as f--- > listening to music > favourite song comes on > fuckyeah.png > snap along to the beat > mfw half the people on the bus disappear 49 KB JPG

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Idk if it has been posted but this one made laugh hard | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 770101768 17 min, ago .. Green text story >Go to bar >Modern Jukebox in corner »Start to browse »See Africa by Toto >Put in 500$ >50 cents per song >Select Africa 1000 times 71 KA PNG >Takes a minute »People start to stare >Leave bar PAfrica is 4 minutes 30 seconds >100 plays = 75 hours >Return a couple days later- at hour 48 >Africa is still playing >l set down and order a drink >Partons look miserable >Bar staff is imitable >An haur goes by >Finally the bar owner emerges from the back furious >Starts trying to unplug machine >Can't- too heavy and its plugged in via extension chard behind the wall Patrons try to help >All the patrons except me >l say "it's a good song" and immediately some black dude screams "shut the f--- up" >Still cannot unplug >You could say "it's something 100 men could never do >Patrons and owner are furious still and getting more angry >Owner picks up chair and starts to beat machine »Machine starts piaying "rains in Africa" on repeat >Everyone is now loosing their s--- >They continue to attack Jukebox for 45 minutes >Someone gets a shovel from god knows where >Machine is finally broken >Everyone cheers >Bar is dead quiet now PLeave >Come back a manth later (yesterday) >New Jukebox >This time I double down Select "Never gonna give you up" 1000 times >Leave >l shall return in 2 days O REPLIES 1 IMAGE REPLY

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Femanon haven't taken the meds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/04/21(Tue)18:27:06 No.63515680 >be you >think women have it easier bcuz more dating options Okay fair >be you >have barren yard, a couple weeds here and there 61 KB JPG >stacys yard also has weeds. >plenty of them >weeds are f------ s--- Having a lot of options doesnt mean theyre good or that youre in a good situation. Men are all s---. Men are terrible people. : Anonymous 05/04/21(Tue)18:58:10 No.63515922 >>63515680 (OP) # >l have weeds in my garden >Men a all terrible Not sure if I follow your line of thinking there. Have you taken your meds today?

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Literally every conversation about Antinous Pius ever. | /r/Greentext

26m (5/6 13:13) · 11058542 3 Re · 0 Img · JPG · 2MB · (2300 × 3066) 2 Replies >become most powerful man on earth >do absolutely nothing Denaranon · 9m (5/6 13:31) · 11058630 >>11058542 (OP) >Become the most powerful man on earth >See that the country is prospering >See that your in an era of peace >Don't spend money on military motions that are unneeded >Spend money for welfare, including starting a orphanage for girls >Devote time to raising children ment to be the best possible heirs >1800 years later >F----- 4channers are mad that you didn't do dumb s---. ...

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Anon gotem | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: kPkSv/99) 07/07/12(Sat)13:00:06M >be 14 year old boy >chat with girl of my age >tells me she's into older guys >pretend I'm 19 >sext with her >arrange meeting >go to her house >it's chris hanson >crew goes to jail for sexting with me

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Anon is a comedic prodigy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)21:31:19 No.63548708 >fail to make a joke >20 minute mental breakdown >refuse to speak to the person for 2 weeks out of embarassment 269 KB PNG : Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)21:45:36 No.63548877 >>63548708 (OP) # >people with autism actually come here and its not just a meme holy kek

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Anon is an imposter | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/31/21(Wed)08:05:52 No.62991407 >boss calls me into office >"hey anon we noticed you've been cold and unwelcoming to your new coworkers unless you fix that you're unfortunately done here" >"sorry im autistic" "OH... OH MY GOD... okay... i'm so 31 KB PNG sorry anon... get back to work and there's no issue here" wow im not even autistic but that was easy

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Anon is Old | /r/Greentext

File: Old f---.jpg (11 KB, 226x223) Anonymous 03/11/18(Sun)19:09:27 No.43783117 [Reply] >Be me >1935 >Losing house >Captain goes down with his ship.avi >Hang self >Be stuck in mortal plane >Bound to property F--- >Be today >ghost fapping to milf and chad boyfriend >30 year old son runs in >Oh no.jpg >"Mommy my tummy tum empty, make me tendies" >Fat ass throws a bottle full of piss at her >Mother begins to cry Is this own personal hell?

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Anon should go to therapy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/27/21(Sat)08:33:52 No.62935258 >when you and another person start insulting each other in a thread back and forth and you start imagining them as a woman and getting married to them and having a family with them 28 KB PNG

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Anon played a get out of jail free nuke | /r/Greentext

>Be me, Japan >Enslave women to become sex slaves >Massacre 14m innocent POWS >Attack Pearl Harbor despite US being neutral >Commit many more war crimes >Get nuked >Everyone forgets about my war crimes >Don't get punished >Sympathy from everyone

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