Anon has female friend | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

3h (4/13 8:15) ·63191200 7 Re · 0 Img JPG 76KB · (881 × 960) >long time female friend asks me if I'm seeing someone and if that's the reason l've been distant lately >realize what she's asking >lie and tell her I'm talking to someone but it's nothing serious yet >her voice cracks >can tell she wants to cry НАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАН АНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНА HAHAHAHAHA I remember 2 years ago when one of my friends mentioned about us dating this w---- said >"No sorry I'm seeing someone" HAHAHAHAHAHA F--- THAT STUPID W---- T HOPE SHE KILLS HERSELF

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Some things you never forget | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/14/21(Wed)16:33:41 No.63215015 >coomed in the bathroom at the holocaust museum 8 KB JPG

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Anon works the night shift | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/22/18(Wed)18:37:12 No.777909733 Be me >Working night shift >local hood grocery store >Customer tells me someone smoking in ladys room >Go in too see 25 KB JPG >300 Ib butt naked black lady scurrys into stall >40 mins before i punch out >dont get paid enough to fully care >Call closing manager >tell him there is a beast of a lady naked in the stall >Hangs up on me >Call back to tell him im not kidding >Mfw this is not the worst thing to happen at my job Also green text thread

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Anon got his revenge on neighbor | /r/Greentext

File: 1568373644855.gif (358 KB, 500x357) Anonymous 09/14/19(Sat)15:58:03 No.54403284 ► >>54403371 >>54403385 >>54403424 > Live with mom for a year. > She lives in a trashy neighborhood where every single house has a dog that is left outside both day and night. > Every single dog on every house barks at me when I pass by jogging in the afternoons. >I complain to a neighbor about it, he says that if I don't like it then I should start running somewhere else. > idea-dot-jpg > Shift my morning routine to 5 in the morning. > Choose a long route that covers as many houses with dogs as possible. > Run through the neighborhood with every single dog barking fiercely at me at 5 in the morning. > By the time I get home at 05:55 I can stil hear every dog in the neighborhood barking and howling at eachother. > Same neighbor complains about it. > I tell him "If you don't like it, you should start waking up at 5 in the morning". > Do this every day. Get f-----, you negligent normies.

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Anon experiences nostalgia | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/15/21(Thu)00:34:24 No.63222122 >>63220698 (OP) # >6 >just started using a pc >played first vidya ever with my dad (first harry potter) >excited about going to school next year 1.12 MB JPG >running around all summer >reading comics and books whenever l'm not outside >want to be a secret agent or an archeologist >know nothing about the world I wouldn't say I miss these days, but I sure was miles happier then

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Anon is not human | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/26/18(Sun)11:26:07 No.778248228 f-----.jpg 327 KB JPG >Go out of map bounds >High level enemy spawns that kills you almost immediately : Anonymous 08/26/18(Sun)11:27:34 No.778248229 >>778248228 (OP) # F--- off. There has never been a documented orca attack on a human in the wild. Orca's don't view humans as food nor as a threat. They mostly just ignore any humans in the water that we see. >>778248231 # >>778248232 # >>778248234 # >>778248235 # >>778248236 # >>778248237 # >>778248244 # >>778248245 # >>778248246 # >>778248248 # Anonymous 08/26/18(Sun)11:40:22 No.778248244 >>778248253 # >>778248254 # >>778248263 # >>778248264 # >>778248229 # >>778248272 # >>778248282 # >>778248292 # >>778248297 # >we >>778248301 # >>778248302 # >>778248310 # >>778248314 # 207 KB PNG >>778248321 # >>778248351 # >>778248397 # >>778248611 # >>778248815 # >>778248875 # >>778249065 # >>778250198 # >>778250913 # >>778251090 #

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Anon got an idea | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/15/21(Thu)00:22:32 No.852097447 >be me, 16 atm >wanna piss so i go to the toilet >got an idea while I'm peeing >p----- all over the toilet 242 KB JPG and on the floor >had to clean everything worth it

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Anon loses his virginity. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/14/21(Wed)14:39:48 No.63213550 >30 years old and a virgin >fell for the get TOPPED meme >met up with a guy in his forties last night >cleaned my ass before going over >awkward conversation and have a 29 KB PNG beer >go into bedroom >he hands me his dead wife's clothes >put them on and sit on his lap >he slips down my panties and starts f------ me as I sit on him >worst pain of me life >go through with until he c--- in me >he kisses me and I c-- immediately Am I the gay?

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Anon gets raped | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/14/21(Wed)13:47:03 No.852053870 >be me >be in college >girl comes over >6/10 would not bang >express this to her >multiple times >still down to smooch tho 1.09 MB JPG >we smoochin >no clothes >she says "I wanna put u inside" >l say nah >she puts me inside /b/ did I lose my virginity via r---?

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Anon asks the hot girl for her writing instrument. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous06/07/17(Wed)22:27:04 No.37570730 >really hot girl in class >decide to work up the courage to speak to her >"H-hey.. c-can I borrow your pen for a second?" >she hands me her pen >realize I dont even have 24 KB JPG paper to write on >shes staring at me >My mind is racing what to do >Draw a penis on my hand >give her back her pen and walk away imgflip.com

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Anon just don't have what it takes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/12/21(Mon)04:52:24 No.15928024 >one chance at life >allergic to nuts 3 KB PNG : Anonymous 04/12/21(Mon)04:54:48 No.15928035 >one chance at life >lactose intolerant :(

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Anon has won.... but at what cost. | /r/Greentext

> Bought a new PS4 > Last ones fan was super loud > New super small slim one > Zero noise > mfw I can hear my parents fight now

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Anon tries learning Korean, gives up after seeing the might of the ARMY. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/06/18(Sat)22:11:49 No.48545174 >be me >want to learn korean >google how to read korean >click on a video explaining hangul >finish video, learned how to read >feelsgood.mov 30 KB JPG >scroll down to comment section to see if theres any useful information >ohno.jpg >every comment is "WHO ELSE IS HERE FOR BTS" or "ANY ARMIES??" suddenly, i dont want to learn korean anymore

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