anon believes in microtransaction | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

File: soyjack.png (15 KB, 644x800) O Anonymous 02/23/21(Tue)00:15:19 No.545486151 [Reply] >be me >playing csgo >trading items and what not >make a buy order for an AK Aquamarine Revenge for $105 >check to see if I bought one today >l did >It came with a bunch of stickers on it >look up value of stickers >THE VALUE OF THE STICKERS IS OVER $450 >mfw Someone took a fat L today.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon decides to do some dumb shit on the last day of school | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)15:55:59 No.848014947 >>848010596 (OP)_# >be me >last day at school >decide to do some dumb s--- >class and teachers stand outside for a group picture >l am in the classroom directly above them >idea.jpg >fill up trashcan with water >dump all of it out the windows onto the teachers >The force of the water takes the top and the skirt of one of the female teachers down >mfw I f------ stripped a teacher naked and everyone saw it, she basically only had her panties left on >Adrenaline rush I f------ bail >They wouldnt catch me if some of the f------ snitches girls who saw me didnt say anything >becoming a legend in the eyes of the boys, get in trouble with everyone else >Thankfully I already had my graduation papers >Cringe every time I remember that s---

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Anon is becoming an adult | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/01/20(Sat)21:02:27 No.56535266 >talking to my dad about my depression >explaining passive suicidality >"while I'm not going to actively try to kill myself, if a truck was coming straight at me I probably wouldn't get out of the way" >his reply 93 KB JPG >his f------ reply >"oh that's how I've felt my whole life" >mfw

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Anon The Dog Person | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 790197942 49 min. ago •.. >at a party >sitting alone and petting dog because aspergers.jpg >cute 6/10 with nice tight bod comes up to me > "hehe are you more of a dog person than a cat person anon" Autism kicks in 178.3 kB JPG > "hehe a holes a hole to me"

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anon rakes in the points | /r/Greentext

>go to whataburger this morning with mummy for my daily tendies- brekky >everything's going as usual >there's a new employee at the drive-through window >he says the tendies are being 37 KB PNG cooked and that i'll have to wait a few minutes >mummy offers 5 Good Boy Points if i just let it slide >accept her offer; should have played hardball in retrospect >the person hands the tendies to mummy after SEVEN minutes >says "sorry about the wait, here's your chicken strips" >strips >REEEEEEEEEEEEE >scream "THEY'RE CALLED TENDIES YOU NORMALSCUM WAGESLAVE" >mummy apologizes and explains my condition to the man >he's visibly restraining himself from laughing >cry to mummy about why life is unfair and blame her for giving me s----- genes >she breaks down crying and gives me 10 bonus GBP >better than usual tendies-brekky, couldn't have planned it better she's still crying in the next room. think i can milk her for more points?

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anon dislikes china | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/29/20(Sun)14:50:38 No.841197436 >On twitter >I tell a commie I don't trust the Chinese government >"Explain yourself, capitalist pig" >carefully lay out a long list of human rights violations and lies by the CCP 52 KB JPG >"The CCP has denied all the of those claims, you're just xenophobic" I don't even know anymore man

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Anon works at chick fil a | /r/Greentext

D Anon is an arsonist Anonymous 19/04/02(Tue)21:46 No. 3421 [Reply] File 155423436523.jpg - (144.36KB , 1000x847, VZGYWFO.jpg) >be me >working at chick-fil-a >doing a promo where you get a free entree or a meal for looking like a cow (costume-meal, tshirt=Dentree) >been super busy >tired as f--- >finaly it cools down a bit >landwhale and her daughter come up, they order 2 #1meals and diet(offcourse) cocke >give it to them for free >confusion.mp4 >say we "are doing a promo" and point to the sign >they walk away hàppy, oblivious to the fourth degree burn that just went down >mfw

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Anon hates fat people | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)22:22:33 No.62367736 >Getting increasingly angry at my fat sister for being fat. >Resent having to sit next to her at things like theaters. >Was subtle for years but now 9 KB JPG telling her she needs to improve her ability to bend down to get things so she can stop crying at me to do it every day or telling her she needs to make sure she can fit in a plane seat when we go on family trips. >Repulsed by her three chins, can't remember the last time I hugged her outside of a funeral. >Hate the fat slur in her voice and her breathing struggles while watching Tv. I should feel like a a------ but I don't.

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Not a greentext, but still a story. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/19/16(Sat)20:57:24 No.712259330 Walking home today some f----- bumped into me and instantly started talking s--- about aluminum being the best metal. I tried to remain calm and explain to him that iron was actually the best metal, but he wouldn't take a hint. He started throwing around words like "rust" and I lost it. Punched him right in his aluminum- 11 KB JPG loving f--- face. I hate aluminum so goddamn much.

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anon is not so different | /r/Greentext

>in my room >dad yelling at me because abusive >calls me a retard >autism kicks in >"takes one to know one" 143 KB PNG he's throwing bottles at me now what do i do

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OP doesn't like cooking | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)15:29:20 No.15636937 >the fish you're about to cook picks its head up from the counter, says your name, and begs not to be cooked 44 KB PNG

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Anon is a redditor | /r/Greentext

File: pgYSqgC. jpg (29 KB, 557x317) O Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)11:50:26 No.848006549 [Reply] >>848006596 i haven't had sex in nearly a year Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)11:51:27 No.848006596 >>848006549 (OP) i haven't had sex

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Anons physics teacher is an old drunk | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)23:49:40 No.848046219 > high school > physics teacher is an old drunk. He looked like redneck Robert De Niro on crack > during class, my friend says that je does not want to have kids. > I dont remember why he said it, but he was reacting to something, that the teacher have said > teacher gets up > slowly walkes to my friend > he took out of his pocket opening knife > puts it in front of the friend > "cut your balls off" > "wha-what?" (friend was around 15) > "you don't want kids, you don't need balls" > "I'm waiting" > he stood there for about three minutes. Then took the knife, wallked back and continued with the lesson He drunk himself to death year later

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