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Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination
Uploaded by CEOofSmashedandSlammed Aug 31, 2020 at 01:12AM EDT
pepe pepe the frog wojak good boy points chicken tenders chicken tendies tendies stories
Origin Entry: Tendies Stories
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![O File: 1445215288691.jpg (55 KB, 438x438) Anonymous 1/06/21(Tue)06:52:13 No.827969426 [Reply] D >Bitch mummy get running >Bring me f------ tendies! >I'm hungry for adventure >So you had better not delay >Dumb bitch >Better make it happen >Stack'em high on my dinner plate >Dippy bowl of that hunny mussy >Then I'm stuffing my face >I like Mountain Dew Lightning >Butt rumbly braps of thunder >The tendies better get here >Or you'll get a mudslide from down under >Bitch Mummy >Better make it happen >Stack'em high on my dinner plate >Dippy bowl of that hunny mussy >Then I'm stuffing my face >l'm a grown healthy child >I like tendies >Spicey or mild >Stack my tendies high >Double breaded, deep fried >Tendies deep fried >Tendies deep fried >Bitch mummy get running >Bring me f------ tendies! >Hungry for adventure >So you had better not delay >Bitch mummy >Better make it happen >Stack'em high on my dinner plate >Dippy bowl of that hunny mussy >Then I'm stuffing my face >I'm a grown, healthy child >I like tendies, >spicy or mild >Double breaded, deep fried >Tendies deep fried >Tendies deep fried](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/list/001/983/882/566.png "Born To Be Wild")
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![File (106 KB, 487x487) Anonymous 02/11/17(Sat)15:53:06 No.34798985 >be me >mommy's big 5501lb boy sleeping soundly in my crib next to my tipsy toy with the hole in her poopoo maker dreaming of tendie land where ronald and wendy feed me tendies atop mount tendie where i rule as king tendie my slumber is interrupted by my sister stacy she barges in with a can of deodorant and a peg on her nose "Wake the f--- up, Anon we're going on vacation!" let out a post sleep poopoo directly into my dora onesie "YOU WOKE THE BABY FROM HSI SLUMBER, NOW KING TENDIE HAS YOUR NUMBER!" "Anon, we don't have time for this s---. We have to be at the Airport in an hour. Mom is losing her s---! "TRAVLLING TODAY ARE WE TO TENDIE LAND JUST US THREE!?" snort Sure Anon, we're going to f------ "Tendie Land" Now get your retarded ass up we have to be in the car in 10 minutes! And for f---- sake get a f------ shower! "TRAVEL TO TENDIE LAND SHALL I AND REIGN AS KING UNTIL I DIE!" we drive to the airport with the windows rolled down >other cars on the freeway swerve to avoid my stench we arrive at the airport and get on the plane get a whole section to myself as no-one will sit with me demand that the stewardess put bear in the big blue house on the inflight tv dumb normie bitch doesn't even know what it is have to jerk my mighty 2 incher to shrek instead "Ew, gross. Mom, Anon is jerking of in public again!" "Anon we've talked about this, now put that thing away the meal has arrived!" oh well, at least the tend king shall receive his tendies "Here you are sir, a delicious Shepherds Pie." wut "Just eat it Anon, Jesus..." "KIND TENDIE DOES NOT WITH TO TRY THIS PALTRY DISH OF SHEPHERDS PIE! FETCH ME TENDIES RIGHT AWAY OR I SHALL HAVE YOU KILLED, OKAY?!" she runs away sobbing that bitch mommy knows just what to do she grabs my chubby thumb and sticks it in my mouth i drift off into a soothing slumber I dream of tendie land once again, but soon i shall experience the real thing i awake just as we land Anonymous 02/11/17(Sat)15:54:43 No.34799011 File: 147574545646.png (10 KB, 240x200) con the pilot informs us that we have landed at london gatwick hmm that doesn't sound like tendie land >perhaps we have to carpodl as we leave the airport it becomes apparent that something is very wrong >where is honey mustard valley? choccy milkshake falls? mount tendie? "Hurry the f--- up, Anon, we're going to visit Buckingham Palace!" a palace! that sounds more like the place for king tendie! we arrive >it's just some dumb grey building with a bunch of marge simpson look a likes mincing outside the walls aren't made of breadcrumbs, the doors aren't guarded by grimace "THE PLACE IS NOT FIT FOR THE KING OF CLUCKS, SO I SHALL DETHRONE THESE IMPOSTER F----!" "Stop yelling, Anon, Jesus you're so embarrassing!" using all of my hard strength a pull the gates from their hinges and make my way to the entrance armed guards attempt to tackle me but are incapacitated by my stench i barge in and see the queen on her throne teleport behind her, unsheathe my katana and actually i didn't do that but it would've been wicked cool "What is one doing in one's home?" I AM THE KING OF CHICK-FIL-A! AND I'M TAKING OVER YOUR PALACE TODAY!" reach down deep into my onesie, pull out a large dollop of tendie slime and launch it at her face t hits her square between the eyes and she drops dead instantly i sit upon my throne, reach into my onesie, pull out a burger king crown and place it on my head a guard walks in he bows to me "All hail, King Tendie. Your Mother and Sister are here your Highness what shall I do" Execute them." "As you wish." I can hear their screams "NO! OH GOD NO! SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING!" their agonizing screaming jolts me awake i'm still on the plane the screaming is real i look down at my teletubbies digital watch >the screen reads 9:02 am 9/11/01 Return] [Catalogl [Top] [Update] [ Auto Post a Reply] Delete PostFile Only] Delete Style: Yotsuba](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/222/061/48c.png "King Tendie goes to England")
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Tendies Stories - Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination
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![[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [ Auto] 13 File: checkthesetendies.png (899 KB, 688x663) ■ Chicken Tendies General-/ctg/ Anonymous 01/26/15(Mon)16:48:24 No.61 79128 >261791 33961791 39 226179157 >-6179169 Post your tendies, talk about your favorite sides, sauces, eto These are the tendies I had for lunch /ck/, anyone else eat some tendies today? Post 'em >> Anonymous 01/26/15(Mon)16:51:57 No.6179133 P> >ketchup with tendies >> Anonymous 01/26/15(Mon)16:52:08 No.6179134▶>>61791 402261 79154-6180495>>618050426182607 The next m------------ that says "tendies" on /ck/ is going to be s------- out my chef croc's for a week. >3 Anonymous 01/26/15(Mon)23:54:06 No.6180495 File: HeyFarva.png (594 KB, 759x455) 6160500 226180609 P> Hey Farva, what do you call those deep-fried strips of chicken? You know, the ones made of white meat and served with honey mustard and s---? >> 11 Anonymous 01/26/15(Mon)23:55:14 No.61 80500 File: HeyFarva2 png (212 KB, 311x449) 226180504 226180609 6180495 you mean Chicken Tendies? P> ■ Anonymous 01/26/15(Mon)23:56:33 No.61 80504 File: HeyFarva3.png (352 KB, 753x451) >26180609226182064 P> 6180500](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/list/000/905/195/5de.jpg "5de.jpg")
![File: what (100 KB, 436x490) Anonymous 01/30/16(Sat)22:37:32 No.666263601 [Reply] 666264259 32666264611 32666266246 32666267036 22666267102 -666268444 32666269049 >wake up at noon >had accident in sleep which I rolled around in >grab c---towel off nightstand and do my best wipe mess from my folds of fat >tummy gurgles loudly, so hungry >plop out of bed, navigate through s--- jugs and piss bottles in my room >waddle downstairs to check GBP board >just enough Good Boy Points for some tendies and sauce >legs buckle under own weight sroll myself into the living room where mummy is watching her favorite soap opera > "mummy mummy I have enough Good Boy Points for some tendies!" >she turns to me with the most disgusting look on her face while I lay flat on the ground stuggling to get up >"s-sure honey, le-let me just get some tendies for you" >she struggles to go to the kitchen without vomitting from the smell and sight of my putrid, feces and semen covered body >she pulls the tendies out of the freezer after letting the oven heat up as she begins to cry into the sink >I roll over and pull myself up to my high chair that starts to creak as sit down >the tendies are done and she puts them on my plate >she can't hold back the vomit as l open my mouth to eat some tendies and vomits all over my plate >l can't let these tendies go to waste, so l eat them along with the vomit >"yummy wummy tendies in my tummy, thanks mummy" >high-chair finally breaks from my heft >mum runs away to her room, sobbing uncontrollably, ashamed of her baby boy >mfw し Anonymous 01/30/16(Sat)22:51:24 No.666265711 File: comfyneet.gif (143 KB, 300x420) 26662670 62-666268255 22666268444 >wake-up at 2PM >Subconsciously s--- in my MLP jammies while sleeping >scream at the top of my lungs "MUUUUUUUUUUMMMYYYYYYYYYY >mummy silently lurks into the doorway to my room s"y-y-yes, dear? >scream "GIVE ME CHANGIES AND FETCH ME CHICKEN TENDIES >mummy silent weeps to herself and walks over to my adult-sized crib with a fresh new pair of magic school-bus jammies >start kicking and flailing my arms and legs because my tummy rumbles for tendies >start to screech while mummy tries her best to not have another mental breakdown session >start chanting "CHICKEN TENDIES YUMMY YUMMY FOR MY TUMMY" > "Anon d-dear, youve already used all of the 20 piece bag from last night in one dinner, 1...I.have to go get m- ushes me out >start beating on the pantry while screa >Mummy is weeping loudl >cry even louder and accidentally s--- new jammies suse up all of the engine I had for the day crying >crawl over to my and crying "WHY DONT YO OVE YOUR GOOD LITTLE BOY" h for the hbors to hear 66626685 Autismo.png (24 KB >Wa cry out defiantly >Tears start to well in he >"Wait...Ok >Pull down >The smell of day old chunks of partially digested tendy s--- and cheese diarrhea wafts to her nos rown r everywher n knife l Teft O >She's bleeding and covered in vomit and poo while screa g how I'm a bad boy uickly put on my shoes and stuff my pockets wit rmi ownstairs to find mummy for my wakey-wakey tendies and bakey lights off, nobody there sthere is a note on the refrigerator "Pumpkin, Dytravius and I have gone to the movies for the afternoon I made some of your favorite chicky tendies just heat them up in the microwave if you get hungy for num- nums. Love you, Mom" f------ c--- has let my tendies get cold and mushy sand she expects me to heat them up myself like a slave >she will f------ learn today schange out of my cloth diaper into a disposable and hit the road spend the entire walk to the cinema filling my diapey with poo p00 sarrive at the theater parki elf in a thi TEN HAVE WASTE, NOW MY SHALL TASTE" en r away ddy say "ayo wut t my lowC say very slowly And any of my oy p](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/list/001/083/463/eda.png "Extended tendies greentext")
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Uploaded Aug 31, 2020 at 01:12AM EDT
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