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Dating Transgendered people

Last posted May 10, 2015 at 09:19PM EDT. Added May 09, 2015 at 07:23PM EDT
13 posts from 12 users

ANOTHER TRANS THREAD! REALLY!?

But for real, what is your opinion on it. Do you think not wanting to date a transgendered person is transphobic.

No i think not wanting to date a transgender is not "trans-phobic", it's like a straight man saying "i only date women", it's not because he is a "homophobe", it's because he is straight.

And can we have a TRANS general thread. like the Feminism thread.

If you're not comfortable in dating someone who is trans, then don't date someone is transgender. You shouldn't force yourself into dating someone you're not into, and if the transgender side of someone makes you feel uncomfortable, you can politely decline, or date someone who isn't transgender.

Last edited May 09, 2015 at 07:29PM EDT

Mr.Stalker wrote:

No i think not wanting to date a transgender is not "trans-phobic", it's like a straight man saying "i only date women", it's not because he is a "homophobe", it's because he is straight.

And can we have a TRANS general thread. like the Feminism thread.

We did but it auto locked cause people stopped posting in it.

I don't think not wanting to date a trans person is transphobic, if someone is completely heterosexual then they probably wouldn't be attracted to someone with a body of their own sex. That being said some people might not care if they love the person for who they are and don't care about appearances (like some kind of weirdo). I kind of fall on that side, to an extent. I wouldn't have a problem with dating a trans girl (even if she still had her boy-parts) as long as the rest of her looked female I wouldn't mind it. But I would have a problem with dating her if she had a beard and manly figure, because that would be totally gay.

Last edited May 09, 2015 at 07:40PM EDT

Honestly.. I am not sure, I am still forming my opinion on transgenders. My "meh" part of me really don't give a sh!t if some one is homosexual or transexual as long as they don't hit on me while my….. more judgemental side thinks transexuals should be burned with holy fire. For better or for worse, seeing Sam here is making me lean toward the "meh" side.

Honestly.. I am not sure, I am still forming my opinion on transgenders. My "meh" part of me really don't give a sh!t if some one is homosexual or transexual as long as they don't hit on me while my….. more judgemental side thinks transexuals should be burned with holy fire. For better or for worse, seeing Sam here is making me lean toward the "meh" side.That being said, I wouldn't date a transexual at this point of my life

Last edited May 09, 2015 at 08:38PM EDT

The way I see it, it's the equivalent of eating a tasty chocolate snack and loving it but then fighring out it's chocolate covered roaches and being nauseated. You actually like the thing it's just that you're kind of conditioned or inclined to not like it because of the concept of what it is.

However, is not wanting to date someone because they're trans transphobic? No of course not you could not want to and be perfectly accepting. Now, is it rational? As I said above it kind of depends. If someone is post-op and they pass flawlessly and you thouht they were hot as fuck before isn't it kind of silly to say no after they reveal they did not always look that way? Again it's a half and half answer. You could probably recondition yourself mentally to like passable transgender people if you force it enough. However, I don't think you should really force it if you don't want to. If you donmt want to, whatever don't force it you have no obligation to. Another factor is how much you value personality over looks as well. Like Starscream for example is someone who sees personality and faces as high importance so he'd be fine with dating a transsexual. Pansexual people for example are attracted to personality for the most part so they are interested in trans people. If you see looks and personality as equals though or see looks as better then you're less likely to be into them.

TL;DR It doesn't make you a bigot and if you don't want to force it don't. Pretty simple.

Mr.Stalker wrote:

No i think not wanting to date a transgender is not "trans-phobic", it's like a straight man saying "i only date women", it's not because he is a "homophobe", it's because he is straight.

And can we have a TRANS general thread. like the Feminism thread.

As was said, the "Trans general" thread didn't really take off the first time and got autolocked. Right now there are only two active threads about trans people, both with very different discussions happening, so I don't find it necessary to make a general thread. If the subject becomes more popular and/or has multiple threads going on about it at once then I would deem it worthy of a general thread, but for now we'll just leave it.

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No.
Literally any for of standards for who you date isn't prejudice.
Refusing to date anyone who is black doesn't make you racist
Refusing to date anyone who is german doesn't make you xenophobic.

The reason you won't date someone could be prejudice though.

2 things on the topic though that i have seen people say before.

1.Dating a transsexual person is not the same as dating a non-trans person, unless you have literally no plans on going any further than kissing.
2.Please, please, tell people you are trans if you are. If you are male, but want to be female, so you tell people you are female, you are lieing to them. People who lie about their sex and expect no one to care is amazing. Its no different than lieing about your age or if you have children or not and etc.

If they're physically/mentally different to what you're attracted to then I'd say it's not transphobic. If they're functionally identical (i.e. they'd totally be someone you'd date if that bit of their medical history happened to be different) then I think it is probably transphobic.

That said, I don't think being transphobic necessarily makes you a bad person; our society in general is transphobic so not being so takes a fair degree of effort, understanding and concious thought.

Skeletor-sm

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