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Guys, guys! I may have been on the African internets, and I may have been exposed to a shitpost while I was there. I think the person doing the shitposting may have had Ebola. What do? I don't want to die. I'm scared!

Ebola should only spread if you come into contact with the infected shitposter, so as long as you didn't reply, you should be fine.

Deactivate before it spreads.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

meet the president and give him ebola

die!!!!!

The elder gods have blessed you with luck and fortune brother. Fear not, this is not an illness, just a mere step for human evolution. Do not resist the will of the Elder Gods, let the energy flow and become one of us brother..

Become a Ebola Men. We shall achieve our true forms togheter and lead humanity to its next big evolution.

Go on vacation; Get on a crowded plane with lots of people. Close contact with other humans really helps with curing Ebola.

Wao is on his way to fight all ebola.
is life
is love

Thanks for all the advice guys. I'm planning on following all of it. I've got an irc with the president scheduled on Wednesday. wao is scheduled to join us in #ebola and voice his opinion on the issue. After that I'm scheduled to hop on a plane at O'Hare where I'll be headed to rome, paris, then spain. If I'm not cured by then, then I should have a deactivation scheduled for sunday. If that doesn't take care of it, then becoming an hero should do the trick.

That sounds a lot like heresy to me.

You could try praying to God and promising to devote the rest of your life to Jesus. Maybe you'll be spared. Probably not though. In that case, you're pretty much screwed.

You are now growing stronger.

African internets? What are you talking about? Everyone knows that the internet is in America.

Well, you see, I was using facebook/google balloons when the next thing you know, EBOLA!

No worries you just have cancer ;)

There's a ritual you must complete to cleanse yourself of the ebola.

1. Get a live female goat at least 30 lbs or more.
2. Draw a perfect circle of chalk in a room with at least two windows.
3. Place the goat in the circle.
4. Leave the room, close the door behind you.
5. Open the door, get on the floor, everybody do the dinosaur.

You're gonna have to commit sudoku, sorry man.

Kell yoosilf u fookin fegit

Huh. What do you know. OP really is fgt.

kill yourself and reroll a rogue

you gotta find the ebola cells, and take them out. preferrbily with a pair of twezzers

this has been simple science facts for simple people 101

Isolate yourself and incinerate your body. Do it for the children…

Jump off a cliff. It is vital you DO NOT LAND IN A WATER PURIFICATION PLANT.

Lie on your bed and have a slow painful death.

Only way to assure you never come back to mod this place.

BACK ON TOPIC!
Listen carefully.
1. Find a Yveltal
2. Skin it and feed the skin to a Goomba
3. The Goomba will turn into Metal Gear RAY
4. RAY will lead you to the Fountain of Youth
5. Plant NO MORE THAN 50 viruses in your best friend's computer.
6. Diss a weaboo's animes and troll them over the butthurt
7. and the final step to cure yo ebola…
NIGGA SONG!

Trus meh gais it werks it cured me mum

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

Simple, assassinate Obama