Bedshit Infamies | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼Settings Mobile Home 11/02/24(Sat)14:12:20 No.79328438 330 KB PNG >Be me >Last night >I'm making out with big dicked chad >He proceeds to f--- me in the ass >FeelsGoodMan.jpeg >Wake up to my alarm before he c--- in me >Realise I was having a gay wet dream >Realise I shat all over my bed At least I didn't fail no nut November yet. 83

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Anonymous 03/16/23(Thu)14:34:40 No.92128194 File: Alpha and his watch.png (1.59 MB, 1102x1190) >>92118515 (OP) >be me >buy casio f91w watch >only $10, such a steal >wear it everywhere >people ask "is that a rolex?" >nah bro, it's a casio f91w >they look disappointed > little do they know, it's the real flex >accidentally drop it, still works >try to scratch the screen, impossible >it's like a little tank on my wrist >even have a stopwatch, so fancy >forget to take it off in the shower, no problem >water-resistant af >never taking this bad boy off >Casio F91W gang for life

File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

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The Irish connection | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: m31c1n8p 10/20/24(Sun)22:00:20 No.485416659 11° 10° 9° 8° 7° 6° 55° Letterkenny DONEGAL Lifford Donegal ATLANTIC OCEAN Ballyshannon Carndonagh Buncrana Londonderry NORTHERN IRELAND (U.K.) Belfast SCOTLAND (U.K.) Ballycastle Sligo Dromahair Monaghan Belmullet 8 SLIGO Ballina LEITRIM MONAGHAN 54° Carrick-on Dundalk Cavan MAYO Boyle Shannon Castlebar CAVAN LOUTH IRISH SEA Westport ROSCOMMON LONGFORD Claremorris Drogheda Baltinglass Longford MEATH Skerries Roscommon WESTMEATH Trim 2 Clifden Tuam Mullingar Athlone Swords GALWAY Athenry Maynooth Dublin Ballinasloe Edenderry Galway Ballyvaghan Tullamore Naas 3 Bray OFFALY Loughrea KILDARE Birr .Gort 53° IRELAND LAOIGHIS Portlaoighise WICKLOW Wicklow Ennistimon' Nenagh Ennis Carlow Arklow CLARE TIPPERARY NORTH RIDING CARLOW Kilkee Shannon Kilkenny Limerick KILKENNY LIMERICK TIPPERARY Listowel SOUTH RIDING Newcastle Clonmel Tralee Charleville Enniscorthy WEXFORD New Wexford Ross Rosslare Kanturk Dingle 52° Mallow Waterford WATERFORD KERRY Killarney CORK Dungarvan Cahersiveen Blarney Cork Kenmare Youghal Cobh Bandon, Kinsale Key to numbered Counties 1 DUBLIN COUNTY BOROUGH 2 DUBLIN-FINGAL 3 SOUTH DUBLIN 4 DUN LAOGHAIRE-RATHDOWN Castletownbere Bantry Clonakilty Skibbereen CELTIC SEA 0 20 30 40 mi 60 km 2007 Encyclopædia Britannica, Inc. Ireland.gif 589 KB GIF >Hundreds of years of history >Only contributions to society are alcoholism, violence, and a global plague of ginger people What is wrong with this island?

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Anon thinks he’s Big Boss | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 111 KB JPG 11/02/24(Sat) 14:17:00 No.79325937 >be me >light up a c-------- >as the smoke rises, get that rush - think I'm Snake >gravelly inner monologue kicks in, voice drops an octave >"Kept you waiting, huh?" whisper to no one in particular >scan the room like I'm on a covert mission, everyone's a potential target >take a long drag, eyes narrowed, feel the adrenaline >start moving like I'm sneaking around, hiding behind corners in plain sight >some dude gives me a weird look >"civilian. doesn't know I'm on a mission," mutter under my breath >finish the c--------, feel the Snake fading >walk away, mission complete Next time, I'll be ready

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"It's not about money. It's about sending a message." | /r/Greentext

File: joker 2.jpg (62 KB, 1080x918) Joker: You have nothing, nothing to threaten me with Batman: **unzips** Joker: MULTIVERSE SHITPOSTING Oh. ☐ Anonymous 10/27/24(Sun)22:47:35 No.204891364 >>204891393 >>204891442 >The film was a critical and commercial failure, having grossed $193 million on a $190-200 million budget. Was it worth it? ☐ Anonymous 10/27/24(Sun)22:49:55 No.204891393 >>204891364 (OP) You seriously think they wrre trying to make money with Joker 2? ☐ Anonymous 10/27/24(Sun)22:54:17 No.204891442 >>204891364 (OP). >capeshit humiliation ritual i'm glad they made it, people won't look at capeshit the same way for a very long time

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Oh he really did made one | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 34 KB JPG 11/02/24(Sat)11:46:32 No.79324892 >NOOOO YOU CANT USE AI TO CREATE DEGENERATE SLOP THAT U CAN J------- TOOOO!! >U HAVE TO PAY ME TO MAKE DEGENERATE SLOP THAT TAKES DAYS TO MAKE AN IS THE SAME QUALITY AS A!!!!! ITS WITEWAWWY UNETHICAL!!! Why are artists like this? Is it because they're seething about not being able to make hundreds of dollars off of gooners anymore? : Anonymous >>79324892 (OP) # 11/02/24(Sat)11:48:25 No.79324899 did you really make a thread for a rhetorical question

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Anon tells /v/ how it is | /r/Greentext

☐ Anonymous 11/02/24(Sat)00:28:08 No.693533513 >>693533662 >>693533798 >>693533852 >>693534062 >>693534262 File: GZ9GJVqXMAA4vwk.png (250 KB, 586x586) >>693533565 >>693533590 >>693533601 >/v/ claims to be anti censorship. >Constantly complains about the presence of women/black people/ gays in games and try to harass devs on Twitter into not having them. >/v/ claims to be anti cancel culture. >Constantly complains about the previously mentioned games, and even go as far as to buy games just to refund them in order to financially hurt the devs. >/v/complains about games being too "pander-y" when they feature women & minorities. >But constantly whine whenever the protagonist of a game isn't some muscled white dude and gets mad when characters don't look like them, i.e. you want to be pandered to. >/v/complains when black people want more black characters in vidya and tells them to go make their own games. >Gets mad when they actually do make their own games with their own characters i.e. Dustborn & Tales of Kenzera: Zau. >/v/complains whenever a female character isn't designed to look like a supermodel. >Gets mad and cry "HYPERGAMY!" when women apply the same beauty standards in return. >/v/ whines about the vidya industry being stale and never evolving. >Only ever buy AAA games that all look alike or whatever some greasy eceleb shill tells them to buy. Thank god I never had my head poisoned with this stupid s---. I realized whining about "Anti-woke" stuff was f------ stupid a decade ago with the goobergate nonsense, and I was only 17 at the time. I can't imagine being a grown ass man and acting like you guys do.

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Anon and the modern industrial society | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I just realized women are now (...) 2.96 MB JPG 10/29/24(Tue)21:31:22 No.79289650 >Go out with chick I'm f------ >Go get drinks at a bar >It's a cool bar. A mix of glass art exhibit, hotel, bar and restaurant. >On her phone taking pics of the drink and food. >Have to nudge her to look at the f------ art >Leave the bar and wander around. >I take pics of cool artwork. >We stop at an Irish pub to end the night >Live Celtic music on a stage >She is on her phone >She turns on Always sunny in Philadelphia "Umm why are you watching a tv show right now? Did you wanna go?" >"No I am having a blast, just we're in an Irish pub and it made me think of the pub in always sunny..." "Could you wait till after we leave maybe?" >Turns off always sunny >Updates status on social media >I figure the night was ruined but I got some cool pics >Am told later that she had an amazing time despite beimg on her phone mist of the night. V .. have become the terminally online gender that never gets off the internet and cries over mean words through a screen

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Anon is still salty about his School crush | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 119 KB JPG >start scrolling 11/01/24(Fri)19:16:15 No.79319733 >be me >have bad day >mad about the fact that I am 24 years old and still a virgin, never went to college, have no driving license and am stuck in a dead end job in my hometown >log into Facebook just for fun >see that the girl who rejected me back in school died >she had a car accident with her son and daughter >all three of them are dead >suddenly start smiling >day is not so bad anymore HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Rest In Piss Roastie

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Trans anon receives a gun | /r/Greentext

Anonymous DONT TREAD ON ME 112 KB PNG 11/01/24(Fri)11:08:50 No.926805712 >24 mtf trans >match with a guy on grindr >51m, has an honest to god mansion >I show up and we f--- >he lights a c-------- afterward and goes on this out of pocket rant about the government and the NAP and the election season >ends it with "and so retards are gonna come after trannies like you" >asks if I have a gun, I say no >he tells me to put my clothes on >leads me deeper into his mansion >into a beautiful gun room >5 separate racks clearly sorted by a sperg's touch >hands me a revolver, showing me what each part does >end up firing guns in this guy's backyard for the rest of the day >he tells me to keep the pistol, says I'll need it Libertarians are the biggest wildcards, man. Guy gave me a $1400 Smith and Wesson and all I had to do was f--- him once ⠀ Anonymous >>926805712 (OP) # 11/01/24(Fri)11:10:32 No.926805777 I'm the guy. I gave the t----- the gun because i know the statistics. >>926805829 # >>926805858 #

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Anon thought he could impress his crush | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 458 KB JPG 11/01/24(Fri)18:35:43 No. 11850025 >be me >see Gucci shoes online >decide to buy them, gonna impress my crush at work >walk in feeling like a king >**{Reaction Speed}**: Yup, they're all looking at me. She's definitely noticing me. >crush walks by, doesn't even look >someone says "Nice fake, bro." >everyone laughs >**{Shivers}**: What the f---? >turns out they think the shoes are fake >crush still doesn't care, keeps walking >**{Inland Empire}**: You thought you could just buy respect? You really thought this would work?

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Calm Before The Storm | /r/Greentext

Anonymous How the f--- do i stop feeling(...) 07/19/24(Fri)07:00:13 No.31644145 1b77fed7950104d5069848cbf8f9e5c4.jpg 37 KB JPG > bmi 27 due to s----- medication weight gain > restrict to 1000 calories each day > get to bmi 23 > stop losing weight out of nowhere > feel way more fatter than i did when i was fat as f---, can't do anything without feeling massive

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Light just take the L. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/31/24(Thu)13:39:30 No.272669895 DEATH NOTE dn.jpg 201 KB JPG >could just kill people in absolute anonymity while sitting at home eating potato chips all day >somehow still gets caught Is he retarded?

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Anon gets BTFO’d | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Why are people so mean online? 509 KB PNG 10/31/24(Thu)21:36:10 No.693429748 >playing deadlock >I die and teammate gets mad and says "I bet you also suck in real life too. >I bet you work minimum wage with no girlfriend. >I respond and tell him that I bet he never touched a woman >he says that he's touching one right now >brings her on the mic and she calls me an incel >she starts giggling and moaning on the mic as he touches her >mfw I actually AM an incel. >lose motivation to keep playing >she says on the mic "are you crying right now? THIS LITTLE BITCH IS CRYING LOL" Why are some of you guys so mean to other people in games.

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