15 minutes of heaven | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous Please be patient I have autism 80 KB JPG 10/13/24(Sun)03:54:58 No.79105558 >Went on a date today >Met this cute girl on a dating app >Coffee.exe >Pretty excited for it, this is my first date ever >She asks what my hobbies are >I say anime and I'm currently playing baldurs gate 3 >Her demeanor instantly changes >Goes from talkative to one word responses and texting. on her phone >Says she has to leave about 15 mins of one word respondes Why did I say this? Can I not be happy, I'd change my hobbies instantly for this girl? This is the only thing that I said that could have caused her to do this I hate myself anons

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Anonymous 03/16/23(Thu)14:34:40 No.92128194 File: Alpha and his watch.png (1.59 MB, 1102x1190) >>92118515 (OP) >be me >buy casio f91w watch >only $10, such a steal >wear it everywhere >people ask "is that a rolex?" >nah bro, it's a casio f91w >they look disappointed > little do they know, it's the real flex >accidentally drop it, still works >try to scratch the screen, impossible >it's like a little tank on my wrist >even have a stopwatch, so fancy >forget to take it off in the shower, no problem >water-resistant af >never taking this bad boy off >Casio F91W gang for life

File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

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File: and-i-thought-my-jokes-we(...).jpg (31 KB, 600x322) Anonymous 10/11/24(Fri)16:08:06 No.204388084 >>204388116 >>204388137 >>204388688 >>204388235 >>204388782 >>204390324 >and I thought my r--- jokes were bad Anonymous 10/11/24(Fri)16:10:44 No.204388137 >>204388084 (OP) >It's simple, we... uh... r--- the Joker. Anonymous 10/11/24(Fri)16:39:07 No.204388782 ► File: 99aeb5ed95933b32b846f29b7(...).jpg (7 KB, 170x246) >>204388084 (OP) lets not blow my anus out of proportion Anonymous 10/11/24(Fri)17:56:20 No.204390324 ► >>204388084 (OP) >What doesn't kill you simply... gapes you... wider.

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Scouting Party | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 2 5M 216 KB JPG 06/15/24(Sat) 12:29:34 No.2673886 >go to europe *M >be american ### >know the stereotype of my people >try to use indoor voice, don't bring up politics, don't reference ww2, don't talk about immigration, try to be normal >right after learning I am american UK >Everyone and their mother wants to talk to me about trumps trial and what I think of it. They also know how to run our country better than us France >women want to tell me how things should be more open and how I am racist even though I don't vote(?) and how not voting got trump into the white house and how biden is actually good ... also capitalism sucks but has an iphone Germany >ask me "is it legal to .." in the USA like I am some kind of walking encyclopedia of laws. is shocked when told "f--- the police" is protected speech in the US Belgium >no one but eastern europeans want to talk to me about how to get a visa and how to find good cheap work Netherlands >get asked about immigration laws 24/7 and why isn't USA doing more to help Norway >cannot comprehend the size of the USA, like they don't get their country is the size of california and that's just 1 state. Proceed to go "but why in our country we just ..." forgetting they have infinite oil cash Denmark >it's like their entire scope of what the US is revolves around s----- cop dramas they watch on TV I thought it was a meme that foreigners are the ones to bring up politics. I just got back and holy f---, do asians do this? I am going to Japan for my first time in winter I can not f------ stand to go through constant obession of the USA.

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In which Anon learned to never leave his cave again. | /r/Greentext

Well that was an experience Anonymous 10/13/24(Sun)03:14:33 No.925866596 >Be me >Decide to put myself out there like my friends tell me to do. >Go to a speed dating event >Actually get cleaned up, dress nicely. >Meet the various women >Talk about normie s--- so I don't freak them out with my niche hobby of 1700s warships. >Think it all went well >End of event, the women that didn't leave are hanging around the guy who made his own travel app. >I try to get a word in edgewise but get talked over by the guy. >Decide it ain't worth my time >Go home, wanting to just curl up and vibrate myself out of the timeline. Yeah, that's an experience I ain't doing again, put myself out there my ass...

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Interrogation Gone Wrong | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/06/24(Sun)20:39:20 No.204230912 2737720.jpg 35 KB JPG YOU HAVE NOTHING TO THREATEN ME WITH NOTHING TO D- W-why are you taking your pants off?

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Anon is worried about the One Piece ending | /r/Greentext

Anonymous One Piece E 68 KB JPG 10/12/24(Sat) 01:50:12 No.271998558 It's funny and disappointing to see how mainstream mangas always end bad or mediocre, and then after finishing it people say that it was always bad and stuff (e.g JJK, MHA, Naruto, etc.) I fear that OP might end the same, but a difference between those mangas and this one is that Oda really knows what to connect throughout the story and know its strong and weak points (if I had to name another mangaka on the same level I'd put Togashi with HxH). What are your expectations for One Piece ending? Anonymous >>271998558 (OP) # 10/12/24(Sat) 02:07:21 No.271998998 >what are your expectations for One Piece ending? I'm expecting some bad joke that Oda thinks it's funny, regardless if it's funny or not. It doesn't matter though, I promise you many have already decided it's the best ending of all time and many others already decided it's the worst one. After the ending drops these people will be s------- the threads and any real opinions will be drowned in said s---.

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Maybe we can dance together again | /r/Greentext

: schizo dykebot rumination feels 45 KB JPG 10/12/24(Sat) 14:41:02 No.79099209 >incredibly long and vivid dream about getting back together with ex >wake up >stare at the ceiling for hours while contemplating suicide i can't keep doing this

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Under the weight of the sinking sun | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 62 KB JPG 10/12/24(Sat) 16:39:11 No.79099892 >5 mins ago >just chilling >lost in thoughts >try to think about memories i had other than high school >all i remember is being on pc >i unironically CANT remember anything worthy >life after 2020 is fully blank >i wasted my youth

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Anon isn't familiar with company policy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Embracer Group EVERY STUDIO EMBRACER GROUP 203 KB JPG OWNS 10/10/24(Thu)11:32:47 No.925718581 >be Embracer Group >have infinite money glitch for some reason >start buying a s--- ton of game studios >suddenly realize they don't have infinite helicopter money >start to sell/close those studios What was their envisioned endgame, /b/ros?

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Hailey "Silver tongue" Welch | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/05/24(Sat) 17:38:16 No.204185841 "HAWK TUAH!" maxresdefault.jpg 120 KB JPG >HAWK TUAH >*makes a million dollars* TALK TUAH

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It's a constant process Anon, be patient | /r/Greentext

⠀ Anonymous 245 KB JPG 10/12/24(Sat) 09:52:01 No.79095977 >Listened to advice on the internet and cleaned my room >Don't feel any better >Listen to advice on the internet and exercise >Just feel tired and no better 5 Replies View Thread

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Anon is thick | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Thick of it 61 KB JPG 10/12/24(Sat) 13:34:52 No.925816669 >No drama. >No negativity. >Makes fun video's to watch while eating. >Posting videos since more than a decade but still looks the same. >Always thanks his fan's for the things he achieved. Is fazerug the ultimate gigachad of og youtuber's how does he do it??

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Anon is a confederate | /r/Greentext

Civil war subreddits Anonymous 10/11/24(Fri)22:34:14 No.17164423 >>17164436 >>17164442 >>17164453 >>17164480 >Visit reddit looking for sources about the US civil war >Stumble upon communities that discuss the war in lax environments >Visit a neutral subreddit >Nothing but pictures of old battlefields and people discussing military tactics >Visit a pro-Confederate subreddit >Southern redditors calmly and peacefully sharing stories about what happened in their local town during and after the war >General sentiment is of pride in user's respective home states and reverence for their own ancestors >Nobody is spiteful or disrespectful to Union dead >Visit a pro-Union subreddit >Front page is all the same unfunny memes with pictures of Sherman with glowing eyes >See countless posts praising atrocities committed by Union troops and lionizing state terrorism against southern civilians >Comments are full of users lamenting that more innocent southerners were not killed or made homeless for no other reason than spite (all while professing to love America) How are they still this butthurt at men who've been dead for 160 years? The men who fought the war didn't even feel as strongly about it as they do. What causes them to be like this?

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