Anon meets a sandman | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 247 KB JPG make it 08/03/24(Sat)09:57:03 No.78378471 >be me >sales guy for major corporation >go to saudi arabia on a business trip >either the food or the water didn't agree with me >get the mad s---- >close to the hotel, but no way I'll >rush into the nearest bathroom >public, but any port in a storm >in there for hours >sounds like the trenches of verdun down there >eventually hear a knock at the stall door >"we will never meet, but I believe in you brother" in a thick arabian accent we didn't meet again, but you've been in my mind ever since, strange sandman

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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is it over? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/05/24(Mon) 17:46:26 No.78401500 >waist to hip ratio >0.79 >im a guy how over is it 199 KB JPG Anonymous 08/05/24(Mon) 17:48:21 No.78401516 w-- do you mean over? you can pick up a chair by the armrests with no hands, that is cool as hell my guy

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War of buzzwords | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: UfFSQpZf 07/31/24(Wed)00:36:43 No.476275266 NI taxi_driver_tomoko_by_kurokimoko_dfqyhOn-pre.jpg > KAMALA IS BRAT :000 83 KB JPG > REPUBLICANS ARE WEIRD ;D What the actual f--- is this election cycle COMP

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anon gets into trans asmr roleplay | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb Sauce NAO ✓ ninja.jpg, 92KiB, 1280x720 R Anonymous Fri 26 Jul 2024 04:59:02 No.78282521 View >be me >2 years ago Report >discover asmr when searching for sleep aids because of le insomnia >listen for a few nights >"girlfriend roleplay" starts appearing in my recommended LIVE >thefuckisthis.jpg >click >actually enjoy it >start listening to gf rp instead of normal asmr every night >actually addicted now >get curious one night, decide to search for boyfriend instead >mfw its even more comforting >mfw i larp as a small girl being comforted by her bf >mfw this has been my nightly routine for a year now is it over? im not even gay..

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Anon receives guidance | /r/Greentext

5h (7/6 19:44) · 71510310 JPG 43KB (1024 × 1024) 1613510906010.jpg 5 Replies back when I was first starting, like 4 months in >at my gym there was always this super jacked black guy that would put up huge numbers >everytime he's done with his set he yells out "0000000 BABY" >it was never obnoxious or anything, I found it funny >he catches me smirking at him after he did it once >he tells me that it helps with the next set >I laugh >a few weeks pass and I'm on a hard set of deadlifts >was still doing stronglifts so these are my max >push through them and for some reason yell out "000000 BABY" >I hear "DAS RIGHT" from across the gym >my next was easier Thank you jacked black man

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Not just the mayor. He’s also the undertaker. | /r/Greentext

78 KB JPG >Bourdain, August 2011: "I look at Guy Fieri and I just think, 'Jesus, I'm glad that's not me.' You work that hard and there's not a single show of yours that you'd want to sit down and say, 'Hey, I made that last week. Look at that camera work. It's really good, huh?" I'm proud of what I do." >Bourdain, September 2012: "I'm fascinated by the Guy Fieri terror-dome they just opened up. 600 seats, something like that? 600 seats. And a gift shop. And all of these poor diners, drives and whatever, douchebags waddle in there. First of all, he single handedly turned the neighborhood into the Ed Hardy district which I'm a little p----- off about..." >Fieri, October 2012: "Everybody's been asking me, 'What on earth are you going to say at Bourdain's roast? He's been s----talking your name everywhere.' And I've been saying, 'Don't you worry about me. I won't touch him with a 10-pole, because smack-talking Bourdain would be like hitting a piñata full of s---.' Real messy. I want everyone to understand that I'm going to be the bigger man. I'm going to take the high road. I wouldn't dare come up here and call Anthony Bourdain any of these things that people have called him: No-good, loud mouth, j------, wannabe authority, pseudo rebel, nerd, s----talking, blow hard, celebrity-seeking, Eric-Ripert coattail, Mario Batali ass-kissing hate monger... Jose Canseco of the food world, snaggle tooth, Lurch-looking m-----------. No, I'm here to take the high road." >Fieri, October 2012: "Anthony, I gotta ask a question, why do you hate me so much brother? ... Is it because you went to a fancy culinary school and I didn't? I hear you're the only one in class who did most of his cooking with a spoon and a Bic lighter."

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Anon can noclip through walls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 30 KB JPG 01/19/23(Thu)13:45:52 No.33882070 >>33880489 (OP). You can noclip through walls. You first have to have 100% faith and run towards the wall. Even a little bit of doubt and it won't work. Go and run full speed into a wall and 100% it will work and it will. Done it several times. Pic related is me as prof Anonymous >>33882070 01/19/23(Thu)14:34:17 No.33882484 Just tried it and almost broke my neck. Kys Anonymous 01/19/23(Thu)14:36:43 No.33882502 >>33882484 Thats because you didn't have enough fait. I suggest trying it again and this time without any doubt.

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anon does something good for once | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ✓ 7e7138e5c441c1c4845938fea986a76e.jpg, 73KiB, 550x550 what the f--- just happened to me Anonymous Sat 27 Jul 2024 19:32:08 No.78299602 View Report >be me a few years back, 14, stonned in a mall parking lot with two guys in their 20s >hear a kid crying, since I'm the youngest they ask me to go check on him >don't like kids but don't really care at this moment >talk to him, doesn't speak English, only Slovak, talk to him in Russian >don't understand half of what he says because of the language barrier and because of the kid crying >understand he is sad because he didn't get anything at the mall, and it just started closing >give him some s----- trinket I carried around with (most likely an anime keychain? don't remember) >his dad comes so I leave and go back to smoking weed with the guys still not sure what actually happened, never hallucinated before

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porn addict at a wedding | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO IMG_5265.png, 20KiB, 586x523 >across the room is a hot girl >this is my chance to escape the incel life >go up to her >she smiles >begin small talk >30 minutes pass and ask for her number >she gives it >good dream I just had Anonymous Tue 30 Jul 2024 14:19:16 No.78331217 View Report >be me >live with mom at 27 >stayed in my room for the last month >finally get a chance to escape the confinements of this hell hole >mom drives me and her to a wedding >I can't drive because I still don't have license >arrive at wedding >mom talking to everyone and being very social >sit alone at a table away from everyone >play on my phone >now time to seriously ask her out in real life this time >get paralyzed in fear >end up not doing it >sit paralyzed from social fear for the next 4 hours >mom comes over and says we have to go >drive back home >still paralyzed in fear >arrive home >run to my room >j------- to the thought of dating the hot girl at the wedding >e-------- >feel extreme guilt for the girl >40 minutes later back at it again

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anons dark humor backfires | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO IMG_4680.png, 211KIB, 1200x675 Is this why I got fired? Anonymous Sat 03 Aug 2024 04:40:02 No.78372190 View Report >Be me at work about a month ago >me and a boomer were complaining about how no where has plastic bags or straws thinking it was a safe space >I said just give me the straw I'll choke the turtle myself bro did not laugh at all and just stopped yapping

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blogpost aabout anons fat fuck stepfather | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO sean-milliken-5aa2fc9225cb46dcad (...).jpg, 89KiB, 1200x900 TLC >CONSUMES GOYMEDIA FILLED WITH >mom had passed away, as of last year Anonymous Fri 02 Aug 2024 02:22:09 No. 78360930 View Report I'm going to blogpost about my fat f--- stepfather. He's been in my life for 16 years and we're about to move out soon. >he looked his healthiest when I first met him as a child >has been working in a call center (now work from home) for just as long as I've known him >incessantly smokes cigarettes and constantly buys fast food (has me drive up to get him this dogshit like a gopher) >sleeps all day, add plenty of medications on top N------ AS IF ITS NOTHING WRONG >crank all of the above to depression eleven because he's such a dependent big baby >barely eats after he lays down, is a total night owl >mostly talks about books, movies, shows he's watched (I could care less of a s---) >listens to nu metal garbage >nauseating talks about fast food too The thing I do respect him for is that he does pay most of the bills and keep up with hygiene. Everything else renders him INSUFFERABLE to be with because of kiked gluttony. This is why you should hate fat people. Sickening.

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Anon needs to take a shower | /r/Greentext

Anonymous W-- is this crap ON G 9 KB JPG 03/03/21(Wed)18:05:17 No.62589250 W-- just happened. >be me >indian male in uni > walk past a group of 3 hot blonde girls > i hear one of them say "ew curry you stink" > all three of them start laughing >recognize one of them in my lit class >find her ig it says "BLM! / LGBQT+ activist / etc" Why are women like this. 23 Replies / 4 Images View Thread

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anon protests agains a protest | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO image_2024-08-01_183859842.png, 759KiB, 1600x1067 Anonymous Thu 01 Aug 2024 17:43:54 No.78355707 View Report >Be me >Driving My car to GDK while listening to music >Drive past Supermarket >There is a isrealpalestine protest >Signs saying "Honk if you support" etc... >Time to f--- with them >Drive round again >Type "c-- throne" into youtube >Up my volume >Apply sunglasses >Lower down the windows >Lower down my speed >"IT WAS A MISTAKE TO C-- HERE" >Stare into their shocked faces while cruising past >Drive to GDK and dine on kebab Today was a good day

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