![File: Screenshot 2024-07-17 8.2(...).png (98 KB, 282x312) Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed)20:48:41 No.78189174 [Reply] >>78189614 Im so f------ dumb >me be, horny retard >decide to do butt stuff >dont have dildo, but i do have a broken handle that looks like the perfect size and shape >hide away in washroom with handle, lube, and banana >i was so f------ horny I thought i could fit a banana up there >try with banana, doesnt fit, by the end of it its covered in lube and all mushy >whatever, use handle >achieve brain breaking orgasm >finish cleaning everything up >dont know what to do with banana, cant put it back in kitchen cuz ew, cant throw it away cuz what if someone finds it >think of brilliant idea, decide to flush HALF of it down the toilet >toilet clogs >think nothing of it, and start using plunger >toilet flushes, think ive unclogged it, water starts rising but stops >use plunger again, same thing happens >start getting nervous, continue plungering >worst thing that can happen, happens >my dad comes home from gym >have no choice but to leave washroom >wait in room while he goes to the washroom >feels like an eternity, start getting light headed at the thought of him finding the banana and somehow Sherlock Holmes-ing his way to figuring out i tried putting it up my butt >heart starts racing, begin feeling light headed, hear the washroom door open >he comes out and asks why i wasnt picking up his calls, explain i was in the washroom for 30+ minutes cuz had to go big number 2 >he says that explains why the toilet was clogged, and goes to the living room >i rush in and check to see if the toilet is truly unclogged, it is I dont know why im so f------ stupid, i seriously cant explain it oh and if youre wondering what happened to the other half of the banana... i threw it away i dont know why i didnt just throw the whole thing away](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/863/947/5d1.png "Anon, you dog! | /r/Greentext")
Anon, you dog! | /r/Greentext
Uploaded by Reddit Moments Jul 17, 2024 at 10:21PM EDT
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![The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/list/002/946/856/9f0.jpeg "Anon is hopeful | /r/Greentext")
Uploaded by Reddit Moments Jul 17, 2024 at 10:21PM EDT
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![File: 1721223225128.jpg (24 KB, 600x315) ■Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed)09:37:03 No.78182637 [Reply] >>78182827 >>78182979 I will never go to the gym f------ >aaaah you will feel much better dude By forcing myself to lift heavy weights and actively do something I don't enjoy? Don't think so >lazy fat p------------!!! I am probably skinnier than you, many gym goers are actually obese >it's healthy dude not necessarily, little evidence >f--- you beta you are not a real man (tm) dont care, plus why would it be manly just to lift something?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/863/399/22e.png "skinnyfat mentality | /r/Greentext")
