Headlights in The Darkness | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Board /bant/ - International/Random Anonymous (ID: XjNb3i70) Dashcam Videos Settings Mobile Home 06/05/24(Wed)17:24:29 No.20467707 UK Dashcams 520 KB PNG [Not original Picrel] >Gets minorly inconvenienced by other driver >Unleashes unfathomable rage USA Dashcams >Car pulls out 1 mile ahead of cammer on rural road >Still crashes Russian Dashcams >Car explodes due to lack maintenance >Truck crashes into it at 60mph; also explodes >Asteroid hits the intersection >Nobody notices >0 deaths Chinese dashcams >Drives >45 people get crushed

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Where DID he go wrong? | /r/Greentext

/qa/ Anonymous 25 KB JPG > mid race .exe 09/17/20(Thu)00:20:35 No.3471277 > be me > weeb > got paired with the big buff sports guy in P.E > have to compete against him in a race > all girls cheering for him > do the naruto run > somehow it works, I win > girls still won't cheer for me cheer me up bros I need some animu to help me forget where did I go wrong

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Making the best out of your situation | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 90 KB PNG minor bs 01/21/21(Thu)18:34:19 No.61966906 >All the teachers at school called me weird >Wrote nasty reports about my "poor behavior" >Sent bitchy letters to my parents and my GP >Tried to get me suspended for >20 years later >I'm quoting directly from their letters in my disabilitybux application form as evidence to support my claim

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Anon is NEETing too hard | /r/Greentext

1h (06/07/24 13:26) 77755739 - 18 Re - 1 Img JPG 81KB (828 × 828) 1712448877227452.jpg 8 Replies 1.5 years as a NEET >spend 8+ hours a day playing souls games, shmups or battle royale >lower back always tense because I just sit 24/7 >fapped so much I ran out of p--- >don't go outside because I started to hate the sun >don't turn on the overhead light in my room anymore >skin is super dry and pale >feel like i'm aging faster but too apathetic to do anything about it >highlight of the day is drinking coffee and sleeping >too poor to do literally anything Yep 00

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Anon tries to sex | /r/Greentext

Board /adv/ - Advice Anonymous expect anything appointed 63 KB JPG ▼Settings Mobile Home 06/07/24(Fri)01:53:37 No.31400453 >try to have sex with gf >she says she's tired >okay, get up to go to the bathroom >she asks where I'm going >"to j-------" >gets extremely p----- for some reason >"are you f------ serious?" >what? >rolls over and starts ignoring me >whatever, go j------- >come back and she's gone >apparently she got dressed and left So should I just dump this bitch? 88 Replies / 1 Image Anonymous >>31400453 (OP) # View Thread 06/07/24(Fri)16:48:20 No.31404309 Girl just wanted to cuddle but forgot she was dating an ape lmfao

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Anon philosophizes about American burgers | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Bagel Calorie difference: 210 calories Cheeseburger Cate difference 257 calories 3-inch diameter 6-inch m 140 calones 500 catines 360 calones French Fries Calcite difference 155 calories Calorie difference 400 calories Soda 6.5 ounces 20 ounces 35 calories 250 calones 2.4 ounces 210 calories 6.9 ounces 610 calories 43 KB JPG 06/06/24(Thu)18:35:35 No.74439132 >Evropean >go to America >order a 'regular' hamburger at a recommended restaurant >$12 for a burger? Kind of ridiculous >a monstrous double cheeseburger with a bucket of fries arrives on my table >loaded with cheese, ketchup, mustard, "burger sauce", lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, onions, sandwiched between two gigantic sesame seed buns >basically impossible to bite into >eat like a quarter of it, box it up and f--- off >feel bloated and have to lay down in my hotel later >go to another burger restaurant >order the kid's meal >the fat cashier sniggers at me >"Order 43, kids meal with fries!" >walk amidst the crowd of lardasses with s----eating grins >it's a patty with cheese, ketchup, mustard, no vegetables (great for kids huh?), and a large loaf of bread >it's still f------ bigger than large hamburgers in Europe What a supremely F----- up country.

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Anon was a terrorist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 123 KB JPG every day 09/27/22(Tue)14:20:14 No.886353261 >be me, Afghan chad >go to America because there is so much opportunity and advanced society >excited for career opportunities >look around >drunks kill thousands in accidents >druggies want more drugs >women are walking p---- magazines >men watch their sisters and daughters used for wetting d---- and left >"it's just today's dating culture" >media exploits primitive instincts like sex, using women in the name of women empowerment >social media is half p--- but "p--- IS gOoD for HeAlTh❞ >everyone is in a manic race to make more money >no sense of family, dignity, self respect I' going back. Not going to lose basic human values for more money. Afghanistan is a s------- but at least I had a family back home.

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https://imgchest.com/p/6eyrd2wox4p | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/21/14(22 12:54 No 24956158249561945 g (268 KB. 314x525)googleb 124564443682.jpg (10 KB 294x224) google 22243556030 (DP) throw my mom Anonymous 06/21/14/522 16:34 No 249662086 uh oh ogreti osa (1.57 MB 640x324) google i >2495560300) SCOTS Anonymous 06/21/14/Sat)) >>243656030 So you has autism? threw my mom s--- n----- are you Anonymous 06/21/14/Sat 20:35:03 No. 249556030=>>249556430 >>249556438 >>249556480 >>249556751 >>249558402 >>249658442 What's the most autistic vidya thing you've ever done? In 2007 shipped Knuckles and Rouge, but the illness grow and grow. Soon every woman I looked at looked like Rouge, and I would imagine her being with Knuckles. I recorded myself replaying Sonic Adventures 2 and illegaly downloaded Sonic X and went back through the recordings and found all the scenes where Knuckles and Rouge have "moments. I compiled these all into a cd and labeled as "prod" would spend hours every day looking at the same fan drawn at that shipped Knuckles and Rouge and my obsession grow more and more and werd e watched every scene of the anime where I was hinted they liked each other and rewatched them. I would look up rule 34 of rouge and single one with Sonic or Shadow I would pretend didn't exist. I got into a fight with someone on the internet about whether Rouge iked Shadow more or Knuckles and everybody in the thread said Shadow almost koled myself that night. Eventually I stopped going to school pretending to be sick (I was 17) and didn't go for 2 weeks just so I could ship knuckles and rouge and read every fanfiction and view every tanan. My parents discovered my gigabytes of fles on knuckles and rouge when I went to the bathroom (the only time I left the room) and threatened to break the computer. I threw my mom and stopped myself tom hiting har with my belt. I clung to my computer and screamed and they called the police where I was taken away and hospitalized for a month 49566849 >>249666463 This want on for 5 months, and I stop tests als again in in January becaus Anonymous 06/21/14/Sat 20:37:40 No.2495564. >>249656030 what the f--- to school the last 2 weeks of the fasco. I started to get really bad during the last 2 months. I had to retake all my state k the tests. I was removed from the national honor society after this Anonymous 06/21/14(S22 16 69 No 249662136 1319578510043.png (199 KB, 326x342) google adb WOWZERS Anonymous 06/21/1452331 21 No.249672206 1316746267034.32 KB, 168x145)googleb >>249656030 (CP) Anon what the f--- Ive literally been diagnosed with asperger's and he never done ANYTHING that retarded Anonymous 06/21/14/Sat 22:42:32 No 249566843>>249566305 4226713731. Copy ang (28 KB, 128x128) google ig >>233) Anonymous 06/21 21:37:42 No.245556438=>>249556685 >>249556030 F------ nice aggatan Next time sa our parents more years of suffering and and your self, stupid cockmanering p------------. Anonymous 06/21/14/Sat 21:40:41 No 249566092 ■>>249667818 3224955665 Ano nous 06/21/14/Sat 22:07 28 No 245 2230358.png (138 KB 375375) googl E >>249566030 OP I could to post, but after reading your post my autom Anonymous 06/21/14 50 36 No 249568402 1403107464663.jpg (45 K602) google iad 2556030 (CP) pratty us 06/21/14(S21 No.249666686 >>249666892 >>249567306 >>249667760>>24966>>249660317 >>249661639 >>2496715239572809 >>249675730 f--- you fagget Everybod moments like this once in a while. This is so we can share what ne vidya things we've ever done Like I said I'm no longer like this knuckles ge 1956 ( Your autistic brain in just waiting for something to sperg about It's not now like you're suddenly normal and in no way autistic No anon, you're still like that. You're a ticking timebomb, waiting for something to trigger your autism. Here ya go Anonymous 06/21/14(S22.03.19 No.249560317=>>249561587 >>249561895 >>2495686 Get. The f--- Of M 9 you still sana anough to Anonymous 06/21/14(a)22 13.19 No 249561639= Everybody has moments where they almost beat their mother and then get hospitalized for freaking out over fictional characters. The only way you co even f------ remotely think that "everyone" (and assume you're being hyperbolic and actually think that siz minority of people do this) is beca Destroy your PC and a roadrip so f------ insulated from the real world and real people that you think this is just a regular thing to do before your twenty Anonymes 21/14 22:15:32 No.245661545 Oh god BUT WAIT! THERE'S MOREL 5626424966209338 » erything that happened this is what I remer the most. This f------ thing is what I regret the most The only ven who ever really gives a s--- about anyos their mother. She raised me, took care of me, kisssed my boobo F--- ALL YOU Rouge loves Knuckles and you ALLOW IT game, all forcking game I threw her across the room she was visibly scared. Go knows what went through her head. GET-A-LOAD OF THIS CAM Rouge loves Kckles and you LL KNOW IT you ALL KNOW IT COMMENCING ROUTINE: SLAP YOUR S--- IMCHEST AND THEN OP WAS A F-- AL ALONG... Anonymous 06/21/14/23 19:36 No 249570851>>249671204 >>249571479>>24952495722 843524382439248234 g (18 KB, 300-439) googl My computer wasn't really led with pom i might have had a couple of folders I had em saved so in case the internet went out I could still be with them 249572621 >>249672739 >>249572786 >>249672862 >>24957302249574067>>249574734 >>249575214 >>249576365 hat was it. I had fanfictions, and pictures of them kissing and cuddling. Sex was something I thought should be piate between them. At dinner I would spend less and less time every day. I would quickly run back upstairs to be with knuckles and rouge. My parents started to get worried. My dad at the table would talk about how commi My parents were really woried. One day, 2 days before the throwing inciden This is painful to type They asked how I was doing, etc. They asked if I was bullied at school, they asked ifa youwoped about me My mom had tears in he on can lead to a better family trying to get me to talk they asked if I was feeling depres trying to jake with me, recounting memories fr thood so I would open the door. She I fet temble the second I said it and they were taken back. The t sitting by the door that night They asked if I wanted to see a therapist. We were had to tell them, and I screamed and forced them but they still said they would do ang. They weren't condescending of the room. I locked the door that dnd my mom sat behind were king on it and Anor bun 06/21/14523 33 49 No 249672621 1402 143 of 11.02 MB. 620x376) gogle iad 229570151 You are a disgusting p------------ and your parents cared about you far more than you deserve. Seriou consider suicide, and leave a note apologizing for not doing so sooner 06/22/14/Sun00 04 13 No 249576365 37 of 11 12 MB 294233) >>24967061 To think things like you exist and have gave their lies to mantain the stable through world wars You are a f------ shame for the hum mous 06/21/14/S23:35:41 No 249672852 140 916099 g (149 KB, 560x606) google ath F--- gus 06/21/14(52) 22:27 No 245 204 m of 1212 KB. 625x625) 45a23:34 50 No 245672739 >>245570851 1335585948 Jesus C KB 584673) google id > locked the door that day and my mom sat behind it, knocking on it and trying to joke with me, recounting the door that night horias from childhood so I would open the door. She slept sitting by My god, that gives me horrible feels. Go kill your f------ self OP, you are an insufferable c--- to pull someth that Anonymous 06/21/14 23:45:06 No 249574057 Worst part is that y say 's painful to type so you know you are wrong. Just accept their offer and go to than you need it "They 'trust me'. Dumbfucks..." -Dr. Shuhei Yoshida PhD. Esq. XXVIIIIII, Discoverer of Autism

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Anon aint got no self awareness | /r/Greentext

look at how beautiful these women are look at how beautiful these wo(...) 02/28/24(Wed)14:33:53 No.76611916 [ENG] ASL S17 Ro.24 Group B (Hero, Mind, Stork and Killer) - ASL English (StarCastTV English) Toss Sefects STUDIO AF 배배배 STUDIO AF 이상형 화이팅! 000 너잇이이 46:56/2:17:24 박병리쌍의 병 페이커도 살아있는 프로게이 PRE ASL T 저그. 송병구 저그 호로록~ 테란 오노 STOONF 테란 24 STUDIO AF ▷ STUDIO AF 총사령관 화이팅~ Activate Windows Settings to activate Wh osdifjsdiofjs.jpg 372 KB JPG >been a fan of korean starcraft since 2005 when i was 15 >still watch it to this day >innocently eating food while watching korean starcraft >beautiful korean women CHEER on these f------ loser nerds >these STUNNINGLY beautiful women show up just to cheer up nerds who play the nerdiest videogame in existence; starcraft its not fair. korean men are spoiled by korean women 18 Replies / 6 Images View Thread

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Anon on r9k's situation | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/07/24(Fri)18:12:23 No.77751555 37684.jpg 146 KB JPG >r9k's tagline was "normies get out" >they never did and flooded our board >threads now are being culturally enriched by reddit rapefugees It's beyond time to cut my loses and find a new home.

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Tree or Woman | /r/Greentext

Would you rather share your feelings with a Tree or a Woman? OR TREE WOMAN Would you rather share your feelings with a tree or a woman? Women were asked if they would rather be in a forest with a bear or a man. Would you rather share how you feel with a tree or a woman? 32m (05/26/24 07:57) 918922378 1 Reply >>918922064 (OP) This is actually a good one. 31m (05/26/24 07:58) 918922421 >>918922064 (OP) A tree won't secretly lose respect for me for sharing my feelings, so I'll go with the tree.

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Anon gets advice about others | /r/Greentext

Jail Time! Anonymous 06/07/24(Fri)07:38:22 No.919514675 >Be Me >Ask people: "What if people hate the book I want to write?" >People say: "You shouldn't care what others say" >MFW realizing that laws are made by other people >Runs outside butt naked covered in green Jello >Robs a bank >Steals a car >Slap some girl at the bus stop with my d--- >Run into a museum and s--- on the floor >Cops tell me to put my hands up. >Tell cops: "But I don't care what others say!" >Get tased >OMW to jail, thanks for nothing, normies!

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Anon asks how to respond | /r/Greentext

⠀ Anonymous (ID: WuVW6ZCW) 06/07/24(Fri)02:43:49 No.58588737 458 KB JPG >Hey what'sup buddy! I came across your stuff and I'm digging it, do you have time for a quick call where I can pick your brain? How do you respond to these kind of messages? Anonymous (ID: NYILRSOR 06/07/24(Fri)02:46:56 No.58588748 >>58588737 (OP) # >He doesn't like getting free brain scratches ⠀ Anonymous (ID: PUi+TPis >>58588737 (OP) # 06/07/24(Fri)02:52:11 No.58588775 >How do you respond to these kind of messages? I don't. ⠀ Anonymous (ID: tOvggpMC) 06/07/24(Fri)06:52:50 No.58589569 >>58588737 (OP) # >"I'll be at the local tavern DONGERS for most of the afternoon tomorrow, swing by for a one-on-one chat" Anonymous (ID: iDaFuAN1) 06/07/24(Fri)06:55:51 No.58589594 >sure but I'm simultaneously jerking off and taking a s---, you're OK with that right, why wouldn't you be?

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Know Your Meme

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