Bad idea.. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories

>Thoroughly wash my face, use shitloads of different products and scrubs to the point its sqeaky clean >Next morning the entire face is covered in painful zits and pimples

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon doesn't like Team Fortress 2 | /r/Greentext

File: heavy_guy.png (569 KB, 1080x709) ☐ Anonymous 06/06/24(Thu)01:39:33 No.678746539 >>678746989 >>678749242 >>678749750 >>678750103 >>678750341 >>678750531 >>678751272 >>678751526 >>678751529 >>678751547 >>678751728 >>678752291 >PLEASE VALVE-SAMA FIX MY GERIATRIC 17 YEAR OLD MEMEGAME AND REMOVE THE EVIL BOTS! PLEAAASE I BEG YOU! It's never gonna happen, TF2 is DEAD! Let it go. Move on.

Anon on tinder | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 690 KB JPG liking my pictures 06/06/24(Thu)11:37:10 No.77738280 >be me, straight male >download tinder >swipe for 2 months >zero likes zero matches >Icantpossiblybethisugly.jpg >remove all filters and preferences >go to sleep >wake up to 100+ likes >initially disgusted by all the f------ >eventually come to the bittersweet realization that Im not a hideous monster because hundreds of men want to f--- me. I am disgusted but I do appreciate all the cutie patootie compliments fellas.

Maybe he was tired? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 64 KB JPG >mfw 02/23/18(Fri)19:43:41 No.43426628 >be me around 5pm >Dad comes home from construction job >sees me sitting at computer still in dressing gown with naruto hat >let's out the longest sigh ever and goes to his room and shut's door 11 Replies 1 Image View Thread

Anon wants advice about getting a job | /r/Greentext

File: 1717623585795133.jpg (32 KB, 624x480) >no skills Anonymous 06/05/24(Wed)15:40:44 No.31392438 >>31392705 >>31392715 >>31392726 >>31393341 >31 >NEET for basically entire life >no high school or college education >dropped out of school in 9th grade >never worked >0 social skills >never had a face to face interaction with someone my own age throughout my teens and 20s >can't drive >have had probably fewer than 10 irl interactions within the past 20 years How do I get out of this? I've literally just played video games since dropping out of high school when I was 15. It was pretty fun but my parents' money is running out. How hard are 6 figure jobs to get?

Anon discovers both ends of the spectrum | /r/Greentext

2h (06/05/24 15:27) 919437881 5 Re 4 Img JPG 59KB (540 x 494) 1706992897867118.jpg 1 Reply >post a question in a thread >post starts getting a ton of replies >get overwhelmed and close the thread 2h (06/05/24 15:43) 919438574 GIF 6KB (220 × 184) 1691013273843181.gif >post a question in a thread >post gets no replies >get embarrassed and close the thread

Literally the first act of Fight Club | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 146 KB JPG 07/12/21 (Mon) 10:00:54 No.64534864 >Be me back in the 2016 election >Go to Trump rally >"I like Trump dude, he's definitely going to bring back the greatness of America, I fully support his decision of building that wall" >"That's why we are here bro, you seems like a cool dude, unlike those Hillary idiots, respect!" >feels good and a sense of belonging >Be there for a short while then leave >Go to Hillary rally >"I support her you know, she know exactly what this country problems is and she going to fix it. I hope she win and become America's first female president" >"Hell yeah man, she must win, you know, you are a good person, a true American to be here with us" >feels good and a sense of belonging >Being there for a short while then leave >Go home >Go to bed then sleep for the rest of the day I'm apolitical, I don't care about politics at all, I'm just a very lonely man, I wanted to be a part of something, I want people to love me... 5 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

On The Road Again | /r/Greentext

Board /bant/ - International/Random Anonymous (ID: XjNb3i70) Dashcam Videos ▼Settings Mobile Home 06/05/24(Wed)17:24:29 No.20467707 520 KB PNG UK Dashcams >Gets minorly inconvenienced by other driver >Unleashes unfathomable rage USA Dashcams >Car pulls out 1 mile ahead of cammer on rural road >Still crashes Russian Dashcams >Car explodes due to lack maintenance >Truck crashes into it at 60mph; also explodes >Asteroid hits the intersection >Nobody notices >0 deaths Chinese dashcams >Drives >45 people get crushed

Anon doesn't like Imagine Dragons | /r/Greentext

ile: artworks-UZEBj8UflcCyRpe4(...).jpg (115 KB, 500x500) Arcane Anonymous 06/05/24(Wed)12:35:16 No. 199821391 >Highest acclaimed animated show of all time >Successful adaptation of one of the most played game of all time >Loved by fans and also praised by them >Beautiful animation, soundtrack en voice acting >Decide to give the show a shot >Opening starts >"OOH THE MISERY" >Opening made by Imagine Dragons >Dropped right f------ there Seriously what the f--- went so f------ wrong with this one. <<

Anon spoke the truth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 556 KB PNG talking about sex 04/20/24(Sat) 17:15:48 No.77204993 >Be good looking virgin guy >23 yo >supposedly women want virgin guys >can pull dates easily >go on dates with women from decent places (church, book clubs, other clubs) >by the 3rd or 4th date we start >be honest and tell them I am a virgin >get ghosted This has happen 5 times already, should I just hire some escorts and lose my v-card? I wanted my first time to be with someone I love. Anonymous >>77204993 (OP) # >women want virgins 04/20/24(Sat) 17:18:01 No.77205012 Where did you hear this? Women want men that have had a lot of sex. >more experience = better in bed >feel good about themselves because they got a guy who was apparently in demand yes this is retarded obviously, but women don't think critically

Anon is winning | /r/Greentext

$Anonymous Inflection point: Should I bec(...) 183 KB JPG 07/05/21(Mon)22:05:02 No.64455881 >27 yo >khvirgin >Meet a cute 31 year old single mom >She has a 7 year old boy >Starts showing interest in me >Thinks I'm cool, flirts, eventually asks me out. >The date was awesome, I was nervous and she thought it was cute. >Drops her at her place, the nanny is just leaving >"Hey anon, my kid is already sleeping, don't you want to come in?" >holyshititshappening.jpg >Small talk on the couch, she jumps on top of me and starts making out with me. >Sex.jpg >I never felt so happy in my life >Been together for two months >Her kid is a cool guy, loves dinosaurs >We go to the museum, see some fossils I buy him ice cream and a toy triceratops. >"uncle anon, this is the best day ever" For the first time in my life, I feel a fraction of what a being a father is like. I feel purpose and drive, my job doesn't seem pointless anymore. I look forward to meeting them and doing family stuff together. Am I making a huge mistake? I think I'm gonna marry this woman and adopt the little guy.$