Anon wants to share his spooky story | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

742 KB JPG at night Let's get a spooky greentexts thread going. Share screencaps you've saved or your own stories. I'll start: >be me, maybe 8 or 9 >at my house, it's around 11 or so >getting ready for bed >in the bathroom, brushing my teeth >the door to the bathroom is open since all i needed to do was brush >while brushing, look around the room out of boredom >get tired of that, decide to look back at reflection >notice something in the mirror i hadn't seen earlier >since the door was open, you could look into the mirror and see the laundry room >look a bit closer >notice something next to the washing machine >looks like a person dressed in all black >it's a giant dress, looks similar to a wedding dress >they're standing arms at their side, completely still >weirdly still, sort of like a mannequin >their head is facing down but can make out nose and a mouth >poke my head out the door to look at it (i was a stupid f------ kid, i have no clue how this didn't make me piss myself) >nothing there >look at mirror again, nothing there >haven't had a similar experience in that house since, still don't know what the f--- i saw

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Asian chips | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 130 KB JPG 01/30/22(Sun)21:12:11 No.871689869 >YES HUMANS ARE COMPLETELY CAPABLE OF MAKING THIS ON THEIR OWN FROM SCRATCH. >WELL MAYBE ACTUALLY 15 PEOPLE ON EARTH >NO YOU CAN'T MEET THEM NOR KNOW THEIR NAMES >"TSMC" FACTORY LOCATED IN "TAIWAN" MAKES 98% OF ALL CHIPS IN THE WORLD, FROM CARS, AIRPLANES OR FRIDGES >NO YOU CAN'T GO TO TAKE A LOOK IN THE FACTORY BECAUSE..YOU JUST CAN'T OKAY >TAIWAN DOES EXIST, JUST LOOK AT GOOGLE STREET VIEW OKAY Totally not demonic ritual sacrifice btw 15 Replies / 6 Images View Thread

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Y'all playing checkers while anon plays chess | /r/Greentext

1537264774886.jpg 11 KB JPG >Order fries with no salt, causing the staff to cook a new batch >Put on salt myself Everything in this world is part of my game.

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Get you a Hagerella | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Date a hag Still, recent research suggests that a rising number of younger men are seeking older women and vice versa. Case in point? One survey found that 81% of women are open to dating someone 10 years younger than they are, and nearly 90% of men are interested in dating someone 10 years older. AG MACHINE TWINK 2.OOMERS! GIRLS I UNDERSTAND ILKE OLDER WOMEN I'MAHAG LOVER 114 KB JPG 05/02/24(Thu)20:25:54 No.77346764 Zoomerinas: >can't cook >always on some meds for their fictional mental disorders >lazy tiktok addicts with no interests besides scroooling all day >dead inside >have sky high standards >have a body count in the 100s by 18 Millennial hags: >can cook >no meds >have a lot of different interests >will take care of you >have a low body count or none at all >are desperate for partners >you can call them mommy Why don't you date older women, anon? They're awesome

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Anon has a sleepover | /r/Greentext

67 KB JPG night >be me >be 16 y/o male >have male best friend >have sleep over >both sleep in my bed cause it's comfy and no extra mattress >both have shirts off cause hot >dad comes in next morning and sees us in bed together with no shirts on >dad thinks we slept together >that night dad has talk with me >tells me he still loves me even though I'm gay >tell him I'm not gay >dad says I'm in denial >dad tells his friends I'm gay >dad's friends tells their kids >whole school finds out >everyone thinks I'm gay

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OP is an enlightened NEET. | /r/Greentext

1h (5/2 11:06) 917765021 20 Re . 3 Img JPG 53KB (640 x 421) FDHFEQKXoAUr3iF.jpg 6 Replies You're just lazy, you just don't want to pay rent, or taxes, or your student loans, or credit card debt, or health insurance, you don't want to work at Target, you can't do this, you want to crash the economy! Noooooo Yes. >be me, an enlightened NEET >wake up at the luxurious hour of 11 AM >stretch, yawn, life is good >roll a joint with the finesse of a seasoned chef >light it up and sip on some premium coffee >the aroma blends perfectly, like destiny >decide to grace the outside world with my presence >walk to the bakery, feeling like a king among peasants >see all the tired faces, the "wagies" >can almost hear their joints creaking from the daily grind >order the freshest pastry, because I can enjoy the finer things at any time >pity the wagies internally, their spirit crushed between the gears of capitalism >"That'll be $21.50," says the cashier with a fake smile >hand over the cash, the product of sweet government neetbux >return to my castle (nice newly renovated 2 rooms apartment paid for by giberment), victorious >light another joint in celebration >boot up the computer, ready to dispense wisdom online >feeling inspired, time to make some music >fire up pirated copy of Ableton, my digital canvas >lay down a chill beat, sprinkle in some synths, the track starts to breathe >hours blur into a creative frenzy, the song shapes up-a chill anthem >finish up, proud of this banger, name it "Wagie wagie get back in the cagie" >upload to YouTube, share the link with the online world https://www.youtube.com/watch?v= 2INUiJDqD6M

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I dont like these odds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 79 KB JPG Ngubu 05/02/24(Thu)09:14:17 No.196741713 >there is a 25% chance to be born a Pajeet >there is a 21% chance to be born a Chang >there is a 13% change to be born a SEAmonkey >there is a 8% chance to be born a Latrino >there is a 27% chance to be born a I do not wish reincarnation in this century even upon my worst enemy

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Anon loves capitalism. | /r/Greentext

4h (5/2 8:48) 917762446 11 Re - 2 Img JPG 35KB (502 x 500) cheap crap.jpg 3 Replies Buy cheaper crap No one can afford things cheap crap achieves market dominance imgflip.com Economy shifts to new standard >Be American >Work local, buy local. >Enter: The Mall >The mall sells cheap crap from big brands. >The mall becomes ubiquitous for convenience and low prices. >Local businesses dry up and local goods become unaffordable. >The mall has a captive audience so they jack up their prices. >People are struggling financially due to the economic situation The Mall has brought. >People look for alternatives >Enter: Walmart >Walmart sells cheap crap from china. >Walmart becomes ubiquitous for convenience and low prices. >Domestic business dries up and domestic goods become unaffordable. >Walmart has a captive audience so they jack up their prices. >People are struggling financially due to the economic situation Walmart has brought. >People look for alternatives. >Enter: Amazon >Amazon sells cheap crap online. >Amazon becomes ubiquitous for convenience and low prices. >Brick & Mortar business dries up and shopping at stores becomes unaffordable >Amazon has a captive audience so they jack up their prices. >People are struggling financially due to the economic situation Amazon has brought. >People look for alternatives >Enter: Temu

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Ghouls lives matter? | /r/Greentext

static_wikia_nocookie_net-latest (3).jpg 180 KB JPG >in fallout 3 >there's a quest where you appeal to the people's empathy to allow ghouls to coexist with them >when some want to be kind an accept, you let ghouls in >if you leave and come back every human has been killed by the ghouls, it is a ghoul only hotel what did todd mean by this?

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Anon is experiencing a home invasion | /r/Greentext

84 KB JPG ammunition >Be me >night, almost asleep >hear crash downstairs >it begins >grab my elephant gun from its display case >beckon my n----- boy to bring the >.600 Nitro Express >got it from the cheap manufacturer, only $500 a round >don pith helmet and safari jacket >kick down door, rush downstairs >see two basketball Americans carrying my flatscreen >crack open gun, load both barrels >tear a bicep trying to close the thing >pull front trigger >round cuts the one on the left in two >accidently press too hard due to recoil, back trigger goes back and 2nd bullet fires >misses, turns television into shrapnel and goes through wall >round ends up killing the neighbors 8 year old kid >smoke is everywhere >I've gone deaf >shards of glass and plastic killed the other burglar >take their hides as trophies

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Anon has a relatable moment | /r/Greentext

128 KB JPG > be me > no gf or friends sad bc long day > listens to music > gets better > thank u music

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Anon Likes The Prisoner (1967) | /r/Greentext

File: McGoohan.jpg (95 KB, 1021x800) Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)18:10:23 No. 198730641 >>198731150 >>198731924 >>198732361 >>198732376 >>198733470 >>198733585 >>198733686 >>198734013 >>198734452 >>198734498 >>198734644 >>198735857 >>198736148 >>198739503 >>198739630 >pre-emptively out-Lynches Lynch McGoohan really was on some next-level s--- What do you think of it, /tv/? Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)18:33:01 No.198730950 It's pretty fun. Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)18:48:03 No.198731150 >>198730641 (OP) INFORMATION INFORMATION INFORMATION Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)20:14:42 No.198732376 >>198730641 (OP) >>198732505 >>198734466 >The entire point of the series is Number Six not answering the question. >Viewers thought they'll get an answer in the finale. >McGoohan outwitted all of them. Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)20:24:59 No.198732505 >>198732376 >>198732545 >>198734067 Number 6 actually says why he resigned in the last episode but the audience keeps howling and clapping so you can't understand what he's saying Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)22:01:20 No.198734067 >>198732505 >>198734465 >Number 6 actually says why he resigned in the last episode but the audience keeps howling and clapping The thing to focus upon with that is that they are responding to him saying 'I'. https://youtu.be/MDDyqbq2HHs?t=1842 [Embed] >| >| >| Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)22:23:27 No.198734465 >>198734067 because the self is one's own greatest enemy bravo kojima Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)22:23:28 No.198734466 >>198732376 >Who is number 1? >You are, number 6. It was right there from the beginning. >>198734540

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Anon Likes Law & Order: S.V.U. | /r/Greentext

File: 1686742410871752.png (434 KB, 788x574) Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)08:21:16 No.198719486198719641 >>198720436 >>198721661 >>198724615 >>198725669 >>198726842 >>198727259 >>198727320 >>198728055 >>198728159 >Go home gamer girl. Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)08:29:12 No. 198719651 ►>>198721977 File: IMG_8678.jpg (105 KB, 641x355) >they leveled up. Anonymous 04/30/24(Tue)08:30:08 No.198719667 >>198719716 File: loganpaul.png (224 KB, 512x322) PREMERE THE SLAP TOMORROW BIZE >ran the G.A.M.E.R.G.A.T.E movement >now a famous star how did he get away with it?

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