Paulie and the gang go helldiving | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

#1, No. 670670681 3/19/24 6:04:21 AM 1710852764037 JPG 1200x674 373.1 kB >T, I've finally figured out the problem with Supa' Earth >Oh yeah? What's that? >The stunads and moolinyans in charge are actually puttin' these giant bugs on all these planets on purpose, it's true Ton'. >Ah Jesus f-----' Christ Paulie, you can't believe everything you read online >Think about it, T. They put the 4-legged freaks on all these planets so they can send schmucks like us to clear 'em out, while they dig for oil, it's all a big cons- >Hey Paulie, shut the f--- up a second, what the f--- is that thing comin' outta the ground? >Marone, it's a bile titan! T, we gotta get the f--- outta here! That thing'll eat us up like we was gabagool!

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon argues with a liberal girl | /r/Greentext

File: 4E8CA13F-5F07-41A3-ACE4-C(...).jpg (294 KB, 828x611) political debate 2 ☐ Anonymous 03/19/24(Tue)14:55:59 No.915597806 >be me 16 >I lean right wing at the time >super liberal chick in class solid 7/10 qt >every day in class we get into some petty >one day she goes off on some tangent more than usual >Im feeling extra saucy and told her she has fatherless behavior >she glares at me before running out of class >awkward.jpeg >I follow after her to apologize >she's balling >I start to apologize and she starts making out with me before slapping me in the face >w--.jpeg Why are women like this? Is this a set up to frame me for r--- or some s---?

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anon has shitty friends | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 9 KB JPG 03/18/24(Mon) 18:22:08 No.915570995 >be in college >friend sends "n-----" to 2 other friends >they claim it was me >hear them discussing how funny it is that they got away with it, record it >don't get believed for previous incident of allegedly writing it on a whiteboard, as well as prohibited from recording so they don't want to hear it >possibly facing expulsion what the f---? these people are supposedly my friend, yet can't f------ admit to sending a racial slur? f--- american b------- colleges and their inability to prove others culpable just because they claim to have autism

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please be fake please be fake | /r/Greentext

#1, No. 76836401 3/19/24 6:22:45 AM 76543456789876543 JPG 800x450 93.9 kB >be me >grew up a loser >started doing self-improvement when I was 25 >end up meeting woman and getting married >get a good job >son was born two years ago >another son on the way >32 years old now and content with life >have seizure last month >diagnosed with glioblastoma yesterday Clown world indeed... 2 replies #2, No. 76836427 3/19/24 6:26:30 AM >>76836401 (OP) at least you crossed the finish line and spawned, even if she ditches you, your DNA goes on 1 reply

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Anon should have stayed at home | /r/Greentext

Anonymous KFC 1.6 MB JPG 03/19/24(Tue)16:33:26 No.76835546 >go outside for the first time this year >walk around the street aimlessly, no idea what to do >go into a McDonald's and order a burger and fries >sit down in a corner of the store to eat but realize I didn't buy anything to drink >too embarrassed to go back and order a bottle of water >burger only has one patty and fries are small, eat it all in 2 minutes >feel too awkward to leave the store so soon and take out my phone to waste time when two girls sit right in front of me >panic and leave immediately >run back home

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Maybe the commies have a point | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/18/24(Mon)05:50:56 No.20315295 KBTX Media • Follow 4d • You may soon have to pay for a subscription to use self-checkout. 7 KBTX.COM Walmart, Target may be testing limits on self- checkouts Changes might be coming to self-checkout lan... IMG_7080.jpg 823 KB JPG >you have to pay to do your own self checkout I genuinely believe we're in hell

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Mike Tyson goes to the zoo | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Live TV 03/19/24(Tue)01:49:43 No.197387058 Creepy.org@creepydotorg .9h Mike Tyson once offered a zookeeper $10,000 to open the gate so he could go in the pen and fight the gorilla who was bullying the other primates. Tyson's offer was turned down. IMG_3232.jpg 527 KB JPG This is the type of man Jake Paul is going to have to fight on live TV. : Anonymous >>197387058 (OP) # 03/19/24(Tue)02:10:32 No.197387496 >"how would we tell which one to let back out?" the logical keeper questioned

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Qing bvlls stay winning | /r/Greentext

mfw.jpg)ImgOps [=] Typical Ming hours Chud 3 hours ➤ ago Nº6607794 Quote >>6607810 >>6607954 >no mandate >Mongols >Foreigners >Low prosperity Might as well turn this kingdom down to QINGgods

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I'm still seething | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/19/24(Tue)07:29:06 No.197379421 654755.jpg 689 KB JPG >8 seasons of "winter is coming" >winter finally arrives >gets stabbed by a little girl >no one mentions it again Worst payoff in the history of payoffs, maybe ever.

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Anon hates being fat | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 13 KB PNG 03/19/24(Tue)02:03:28 No.76834159 I hate being fat so much. I'm so f------ fat I need clamps to spread open my asscheeks every time I spew liquid diarrhea into my perpetually clogged toilet every night. I'm sick and tired of it and there's literally nothing I can do. I f------ hate this cold, unforgiving, gay earth with every fiber of my body.

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Iron from the North | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/11/24(Sun)22:34:09 No.76425781 download - 2024-01-16T034015.395.jpg 4 KB JPG >watch youtube channel and couple that have channel together >one day guy uploads video saying his gf cheated for months and makes half hour long video going pretty hardcore in depth about people not being worthy and crying and what not whilst being emotionally f----- but will go forward with channel alone >guy deletes video maybe cause legal consequences or what not >time pass nothing happens >no uploads >comes back and announces they are back together after solving things it's over, he's gone, he lost, succubi are real

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Reaching based levels thought impossible | /r/Greentext

Heisei-kun @twentymatches Two prominent political twitter accounts got doxed in Japan. One on the left, one on the right. Both run by the same guy. 13:52 12 Nov 21 Twitter Web App >My political beliefs? Depends on who I'm trolling

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Anon loves Benadryl | /r/Greentext

File: 81ugVJ7PVML.jpg (501 KB, 2560x2560) Benadryl ALLERGY EXTRA STRENGTH Diphenhydramine HCI 50mg | Antihistamine Runny Nose 24 TABLETS Anonymous 03/18/24(Mon) 17:42:22 No. 76831376 >>76831422 >>76831453 >>76831911 >>76832556 I have found the perfect drug to talk to women with >Drive to Walgreens >Buy a box of Benadryl >Drive to bars >Take 15-20 tablets >Start talking to women when the buzz kicks in >Black out >Wake up in another woman's bed This has worked 4 times. They've all been land whales, but at least I'm having sex now. I think. Anonymous 03/18/24(Mon) 17:47:03 No.76831422 Anonymous 03/18/24(Mon) 17:47:53 No.76831428 >>76831376 (OP) >anon has sex with fat shadow people that only exist in the confines of his mind and gives himself early onset dementia my father OD'd and died on that stuff back in the 90s. be careful anon. Anonymous 03/18/24(Mon) 17:50:16 No.76831453 >>76831376 (OP) >>Take 15-20 tablets You'd be dead you lying n---- I do take it to go to sleep tho Anonymous 03/18/24(Mon) 17:52:34 No.76831477 >talk to women on 500mg Benadryl >she disappears in a cloud of smoke and you realize you've been alone in your room the whole time.

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