Anon drives | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

>be me >have constant left-right disorientation >18 y/o >take driving test >driving instructor tells me to turn left >turn right >"I told you to turn left, Anon!" >"Well, the earth is round, so when I go right, I will eventually come out on the left side." >driving instructor chuckles >I pass the exam 28 KB JPG

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon seeks advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Help me with this girl 148 KB JPG 02/29/24(Thu)10:40:12 No.914648512 >be me >3rd year university student basically >Qt with attractive lips girl from 2nd year glances at me always >Ask guys about her and they tell me she's a bitch or like really bad girl >She is always with a friend girl of hers but when she's alone she's with a guy but she always makes eye contact with me > She tries desperately to get my attention but i just walk away >Ask my friend about her and he tells me she's a bitch again >She always glances to me 278 KB JPG Now this girl i know she's a bitch but i feel like she's kind of f----- or really misunderstood i mean i don't have savior complex but like really i could do it the Taxi driver way and tell her "i always feel like you're lonely here and you want somebody" and make her feel unique right? But still she might want to f--- and sadly i don't have anywhere to go and i don't have that many social circle friends and i'll probably f--- up at first week and i'll just be a laughing stock whenenever i pass by. What do you think guys : Anonymous 02/29/24(Thu)10:47:50 No.914648822 taking dating tips from Taxi Driver You love to see it

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The Boonies are scary | /r/Greentext

8:18 80% Anonymous 7 days ago 19128469 Worked at Long Johns in high school and outside the deaths of loved ones it was the most traumatic experience of my life. >rats, mice, roaches they'd fall into the fryers and our manager/owner would tell us to scoop em out and toss em >oil wasn't replaced often, maybe once a month >mold in soda machine >one of the senior cooks was a developmentally disabled guy; cool dude but prone to violent outbursts, racial epithets, self-harm, threats, with a grade school education >no idea who took care of him or how he even got to work, he was just there when I'd arrive and he always stayed late >maybe manager's pet, no f------ idea >he'd also grope the female employees (all of whom quit because I'd tell them it wasn't safe for them) >was also at the outskirts of town and there was a cleaner, better one near the city center so no excuse to even go to ours >but we had regulars and I just kept my head down, tried to keep things clean, avoided the retarded cook as much as I could, and never ate there >go to work one day after school >lights are on, can see the fryers are on, but the doors are locked and nobody is answering my knocks or the phone inside >manager's has a regular window, decide to see if I can open it from the outside >the fryers were going, place could burn down >get to the window, see my manager f------ the retard on the floor of his office >get spooked, but in my hurry I up some gravel and s--- kicked Decided to go back an hour later. It's really tense. Get through my shift and I'm helping the retard close. He's turning off the fryers, I walk by him to start counting off the register and he just dunks his head right into the oil. His skin slid right off his face and neck and the worst part is he doesn't even scream, he just making this god awful gargling sound like he's swallowed two lungs of water. Called 9/11. I never went back. Never asked for my last paycheck. Took me a year to even tell somebody else what happened and I still smell and hear the moment. 16 REPLIES 1 19128520 Anonymous 6 days ago F2E522C6-6EEE-485A-BDD9-29CCE67561FB.png (1,015.2

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Anon the groomer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous te 08/04/22(Thu)09:37:50 No.883271311 >be me >single, first apartment on my own fresh out of high school 48 KB JPG >notice new young girl there >adopted by this weird old dude old enough to be her grandpa >sheltered af, never see her leave for school or anything else except the park, but she's always happy there, even alone /b/ help I think I may have f----- this bitch's head up >we end up becoming friends >find out she came from a big family but barely knew her siblings or parents, went into foster care well before she hit puberty, so she's really alone and needs a friend >we end up becoming really close friends, she's always happy to see me, runs over and hugs me when I get home from work if she sees me >fast forward a bit >watched her grow up, physically matured but still sheltered af, actually really beautiful but doesn't know it >skinny, athletic, not even 100 pounds, maybe 5'2" if she stretches for it Cont... >beautiful brown eyes, hair color like pic related, and a personality I love, always happy >literally perfect, with her finally being old enough I can't resist anymore Anonymous 08/04/22(Thu)09:38:23 No.883271330 >one day after she hugged me on my way home I kissed her >she immediately kissed me back with lots of tongue >I was surprised by how aggressive she was >she clearly wants me and even though her homeschooling doesn't include sex ed she knew what was going on >took her to bed and f----- her silly >she tasted so good >couldn't keep her mouth off my d--- at first >I was her first >f--- she was so warm and wet for me >getting hard just thinking about how good it felt to c-- in that virgin p---- >she stayed in bed with me all night, never left my side >didn't think anything would change but now she's constantly bending over in front of me, even around other people >absolutely knows what she's doing little slut pant >can't get enough of me, has groped my d--- in public, luckily no one noticed >can't afford people finding out, her adopted dad would flip the f--- out if anyone knew >she has no interest in being subtle and I'm worried she's going to get us both f----- over >>883271977 # how the f--- do I get my dog to stop licking my crotch in public?

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Anon had a gym crush | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_9039.jpg (821 KB, 1170x1506) Autism Stops a W---- Anonymous 02/29/24(Thu)01:57:32 No.914643881 [Reply] >Workout regularly (I'm pretty jacked tbh) >Go to small gym, like 10 people tops >Notice 8.5/10 qt (body 9, face 8) >She's basically wearing underwear >Only does ass exercises, always bends over at the hips to pick up water bottle >Attention seeking maximum overdrive >Notice what time she comes and goes (in a non-creepy way) >Start going at same time as her, check her out >She notices, starts looking at me too >Nowismychance.jpg >Edge in the locker room x30 minutes while I meditate on what I should say >Approach her on my way out >Autism.exe starts running in the background >Forget my lines, mumble the stupidest question imaginable >She doesn't hear >Ask again >She starts talking awkwardly >I realize how stupid I look, turn around and walk out of the gym while she's still talking >Next several times at the gym, she's wearing more modest clothing, doesn't bend over or make eye contact anymore >Accidentally thwarted a w---- Anonymous 02/29/24(Thu)02:40:25 No.914645927 what did you ask her OP

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Will they ever learn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Literally how STUNT COORDINATOR COMPOSER PRODUCER 02/29/24(Thu)05:34:10 No.196742091 SET COSTUMES DECORATOR DESIGNER >Female Director >Female Producer EDITOR >Female Editor >Female Writer >Female VFX Supervisor >Female Composer marvel.jpg 605 KB JPG DIRECTOR >Female protagonist, not one but 3 of them >Female villain HAIR & MAKEUP TARA DEMARCO VISUAL EFFECTS SUPERVISOR WRITERS wokebros how could this fail? It had all the girl power in the world. It must be incels

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Anon finally reads the history | /r/Greentext

>BE AN ETHNO-NATIONALIST STATE >INVADE YOUR NEIGHBORS FOR THE CRIME OF EXISTINCE >OCCUPY PALESTINE FOR DECADES, REFUSE TO GIVE THEM A STATE >REFUSE GRANTING THEM AND THEIR CHILDREN CITIZENSHIP, CREATING GENERATIONS OF REFUGEES >SIGN AGREEMENT WITH YOUR PALS TO REFUSE PEACE AT ALL COSTS >KILL ARABS EN MASSE FOR REJECTING YOUR RULE >BE ARAB COUNTRIES >PIC UNRELATED ✡ reddit

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anon breaks the cycle of abuse | /r/Greentext

Anonymous being a single father 02/28/24(Wed)15:44:29 No.76611108 >be me >difficult child >mother and sometimes father would always tell me they hoped I had a child like me so I could understand how hard things were for them >ffw to age 28 >had a wife but lost her to covid >left me with one boy >hes a lot like me, but still immensely reminds me of her >has a lot of the difficult personality traits I had as a kid >its really not that hard to just let him be autistic or whatever 30 KB JPG >parents hate him >mother tells me to physically reprimand him for things like singing a TV show theme at 9pm >dad threatens to take him from me when I tell him its ok that he dropped the dinner I made in the floor >think back to how I was as a kid >I wasnt even difficult they were just s----- parents >they hate me for doing what they couldnt >mfw I have the best kid in the world

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Anon is interested in foreign policies | /r/Greentext

File: Balkans_regions_map-5b828ef146e0fb0(...).jpg (144 KB, 1500x1129) TOONA HOEV MEHTEREGION AND See SERAM The MACDONA KALLA BULDA Aute Balkans Anonymous 02/28/24 (Wed)21:57:09 No.914632871 [Reply] Give me a single good reason why America should waste its money defending these inbred shitholes. Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)21:57:53 No.914632901 >>914633009 >>914633096 their men look generally better than the men we have here Metal Dragon 02/28/24(Wed)21:58:38 No.914633009 File: 2324523423453455.jpg (34 KB, 618x349) >>914632901 that's f------ sad Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)22:00:39 No.914633096 >>914632901 >Their men look better That's a funny way of saying ugly as s---

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Anon can't visit Japan | /r/Greentext

File: Anna McNulty.jpg (154 KB, 634x1149) our ages Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)16:01:45 No.914619379 [Reply] >>914631704 Would you date a woman who looks much younger than her age? For example, she's actually 21 but she looks like a 15 year old? +35 replies and 3 images omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 02/28/24 (Wed) 20:54:48 No.914630374 ► >>914628506 I'm old enough to remember when a thread on /b would die after 3 minutes of no reply Anonymous 02/28/24 (Wed)21:25:34 No.914631704 >>914619379 (OP) Yes, because I look younger than I am Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)21:35:30 No.914632086 Life's dream. I've done stupid s--- to get girls like that no matter the cost. I'll go as young as they'll let me (say 16 to 30 with me at age 40) and look for people that look extremely young and flat for their age. Usually they have low self esteem. Sadly the only legal loli I got ended up f------ crazy. The girl I have now looks 5-10 years younger when she's thin but she's put on a few. Still love her to bits though. But seriously. F------ LOVE young looking girls. I could barely contain myself in japan. I really hope that the upcoming generation of kids continues the neonoty trend because it's great. Shauna Rae and tiny texy are like dream girls to me. I would love to find more like that.

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Anon is poor | /r/Greentext

File: poorfag.jpg (402 KB, 937x528) 19 16 Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)20:51:57 No.914632926 [Reply]► >>914632932 >>914632935 >>914632944 >>914632948 >>914632950 >>914632951 >>914632952 >>914632954 >>914632960 >>914632966 >>914632968 >>914632996 >Economy keeps getting worse >Everyone and their mother wants a master's degree for an entry level job >Become a permanent NEET How do you get new games as a poorfag? >Hard mode: No piracy 77 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)21:57:35 No.914633004 >>914633000 Yeah, I crawled my way out of a poverty childhood, but I still have empathy for people. It's b------- out there right now, we're the first generation in the west to have less opportunity than their parents and it's hard not to feel bitter when barely literate dudes in my hometown own millions in properties after dropping out of grade 10 and working a factory job. I'm comfortable, but I had to bust ass to get here, and in their generation I'd be downright wealthy. Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)21:58:07 No.914633005 Genuinely wondering if I can make deepfake Al people as my references to shill for me and say what a good skilled wagie I am and how you should totally hire me. Anonymous 02/28/24 (Wed)21:58:10 No.914633006 Every anon on 4chan has an "English degree", started at a "call center" and now earns six figures doing nothing while buying acres of lands.

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Anon tries to blow a whistle | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_6868.jpg (415 KB, 1170x2131) Kitty Kittens Kitty n Kittens Sk Home Videos Shorts Community Lat Cat Slapsh Surpring Trut What The A From ther Mouth Butt We T Cute Kit World Kitty K Animal Abuse Ring on YouTube Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)19:30:47 No.914626959 [Reply] >>914629393 >>914630731 >>914627287 GTFO glownigger >Be me >Find YT short in the algorithm of guy holding knife to kittens tail >Nothing happens, but it looked like he was about to cut it off in the thumbnail >Look at his channel >This literal Jeet is in on some animal abuse ring on YouTube >Find another video where he takes away corpse of dead kitten away from mother. S--- is literally the same as Elsagate but with animals. I thought this weird signaling s--- was only exclusive to pedophiles but I guess I was wrong. I just wanted some mind bleach before work tonight but now this p------------ ruined my whole day. +7 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 02/28/24 (Wed)20:28:19 No.914629246 Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed)20:31:51 No.914629393 >>914626959 (OP) That's why I hire ex seals. Anonymous 02/28/24 (Wed) 21:02:32 No.914630731 >>914626959 (OP) try to determine which country uploader is from, and when you report to jewtube, tell them that you will denounce the crime to law enforcement and they are asked not to delete incriminating evidence or your journalist friends will accuse them of being complicit

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I've heard polack, Ruskie and guido before. Not familiar with the rest. | /r/Greentext

File: 1599283960127.jpg (51 KB, 500x457) Who says there aren't slurs for ytpipo Anonymous 02/29/24(Thu)02:04:46 No.194294479 >Wop >D--- >Mick >Limey >Frog >Taig >Paddy >K---- >Ruskie >Hun >P----- >Hohol >G---- >Porridge wog

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