untitled post | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

File: hammock.png (227 KB, 597x280) misfortune on 28th Anonymous 10/31/23(Tue)12:50:15 No.908563005 >be me, libra >"beware, the full moon on the 28th will bring misfortune unless you take care" >yeah right >fast forward to 28th >grandpa dies

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon thinks WW3 will be comfy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: vbZD4H90 10/31/23(Tue)12:56:58 No.447027338 >>447026636 (OP) # >born too early to be gaslit into GWOT enlistment >born too late to be drafted >born just in time for sitting back and not giving a s--- WWIII will be comfy for me >>447033871 #

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How do I turn back the text into green back? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/31/23(Tue)07:17:43 No.140326306 5g7pup.png 25 KB PNG 0 >Uzi is the subversion of the YA teenage girl >N is the subversion of the YA heartthrob guy >Show itself subverts itself from being a quirky "we have to stop the evil robot vampires" and "we need to kill all humans" comedy/horror show into focusing on a true cosmic horror brought by manand how it's leading to the death of everything it touches I didn't really think about it before but that's just really neat

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It’s simple, we kill the Batman | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 14 KB JPG > be me > family starving > decide to commit crime > batman shows up > breaks my leg, both arms and spine > says he doesn't kill and leaves me with the pain > hospital bill I can't pay > mfw I have to commit crime to pay hospital bill now

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Average New Vegas thread | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous LE >Rapists >Mass murderers >Cringe Larpers 10/29/23(Sun)21:51:18 No.655721874 maxresdefault (31).jpg 156 KB JPG >No modern medicine allowed (except for when caesar needs it LOL) >So gay that with homosexuality outlawed their f-- soldiers still bang eachother even under threat of execution >B-b-but at least their roads are safe!!! Nice morally grey faction you got there Obshittyion : Anonymous >no taxes >no bureaucracy, everything gets done in the spot >safest cities and roads in the wasteland 10/29/23(Sun)21:58:58 No.655722460 >physical and mental health given maximum priority for the bulk of its population >strong unified culture that will outlive the political entity itself Sounds good to me. I don't care about the murder and r---.

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Anon listens to music on a Bluetooth speaker | /r/Greentext

File: image0.jpg (181 KB, 1024x1024) FELE >morning, only dad home >decide to watch p--- >have bluetooth earphones >suddenly it goes silent Anonymous 10/31/23(Tue)14:50:32 No.75252043 >>75252052 >>75252153 Okay so this happened to me >two weeks ago >cooking in kitchen >playing music on bluetooth speaker >forget to unpair after done with cooking >next day >hear some sound from kitchen, instantly stop the video >sound from kitchen stops >im paired with the speaker, my dad just went to cook and turned it on and it paired >not sure if he heard any moans or what >he has been knocking my door when going to my room ever since

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Least pessimistic anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 71 KB JPG Anonymous 10/31/23(Tue)15:05:16 No.75248694 197 KB JPG If you're not >6'5 tall What is the point of living? >Athlete, 100% muscle >Chiseled Chad face >8 inch c--- >white, blue eyed blond haired >200 IQ 10/31/23(Tue)15:39:23 No.75248977 >>75248694 (OP) # because life is good, man.

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Swords are cool | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 50 KB JPG 10/25/21(Mon)03:22:07 No.158184612 >its the year 10138 or whatever >people have massive space ships, laser, shielding technology and yuge bombs >armies fight with swords and knives H-------- what a dumb p------------, literally did a 360 and walked out of the movie theater

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anon goes hunting | /r/Greentext

File: 797.png (1.99 MB, 1280x720) Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)13:30:50 No.908525110 Nah, I'm thinking it's time for TSD. No leaves on the trees soon, optimal time for a total wipe. Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)12:59:08 No.908523526 >>908525498 SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK SEND THE GREYS BACK Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)13:40:12 No.908525498 >>908523526 (OP) # >be 12 >turkey hunting with my pappy >sitting on a log pretending to be a sniper with my shotgun >pappy is off wherever the f--- >squirrel appears maybe 6 feet away on the trunk of a tree >BAM >squirrel explodes >tail still intact >cut off the last bit of its butt and stick it in my hat band >pap laughed and said good job Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)13:44:47 No.908525732 >>908525498 # I enjoyed this story. Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)14:01:28 No.908526455 >>908525732 # >be 10 >>908525732 >staying with grandparents >pap want to take me hunting and stuff >he grabs shotgun out of cabinet and says follow him >go to backyard with big farm field at far end >never handled a gun before >fumble around a bit but get the breach open >load shell and close it >take saftey off and aim >pap tacks a target to tree stump we cut down a few days prior >hands me shotgun and shell and tells me to shoot the target >about 5 feet away >miss completely >pap laughs and says try again >hit it >fire 4 more rounds >hear sirens >>908526455 >pap says uh oh >go inside and watch cops drive up and down the street

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Anon is feral | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 6 KB JPEG 10/31/2023, 3:51:33 AM No.86806243 Be me. 2015. Live with my mom. New neighbors just moved in. In the process of moving out. Mom is watching sister's new dog. Ride my bike down the street to grab some Twisted Teas like a true alcoholic. See my mom taking the dog out when I get home, and hiss at her like a feral cat to scare her while crusing by on my bike. Get inside, and realize it wasn't my mom, was my neighbor. Moved out two weeks later and never confronted her about the incident. She will now forever remember moving into a new house, and having her neighbor violently hiss at her before disappearing, never to be seen again.

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Anon meets a good boy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Tue 01 Oct 2013 20:32:58 No.18188569 Quoted By: >>18188690 >>18189166 Okay, here's a story. >Be 15 >Just got my first personal .22 rifle, all mine, super proud > Little bolt thing, super accurate, loved it >Have a family friend who owns property like 10 min drive from our house >On this property is an old house >Built by homesteaders around 100 years ago, falling apart >Right next to it is a creek and a field >We used to camp on the far side of the field all the time, also would shoot using creek as a berm >One day I decide I want to go camping >Bike out there with my .22, a box of ammo and normal camping kit >Super excited, shoot like 200 rounds at cans and s--- from the trash hole nearby (in the 60s someone lived on the property in a trailer and threw trash in this sinkhole type thing) >Started getting dark, built a fire and busted out the harmonica to practice >I was terrible at it but it kept my mind busy whilst relaxed >Suddenly something isn't right, I feel like I'm being watched >Hair on neck is raised, heart elevated >My mind starts racing, imagining things unseen out there >Clutching rifle and flashlight scanning the field and trees for movement, shadows playing tricks on my mind and I'm s------- bricks >Moonless night, goddamnit I want to go home now >Wish I'd brought a tent at least to hide inside, it was summer in Texas and was too hot but I wanted that security now >Started building fire bigger >Made a torch of sorts with a stick and a torn up t-shirt I'd brought along with thoughts of making some sort of camouflage for my rifle >Darkness is giving up no secrets but I can definitely hear something out there walking around >Didn't want to shoot because sometimes cows wander onto the property >fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck >ineverwantedthis.jpg >maybe coyotes, they're common out here >but no, not in this particular area, too many farmers and rednecks hunt them, they avoid it >jesus christ I think I hear breathing >it's kind of circling me, getting closer >>18188569 >pissing pants by this point, wishing I had something big bore >this was before cellphones were inexpensive, I didn't have one >Just told my parents I was going camping and where >Great, so they'll just find my grisly remnants tomorrow morning after I don't come home >Sweating buckets and running out of wood, fire dying >Contemplating running for it but the woodsman in me wouldn't leave the fire, it was too dry out there >The suddenly I hear a deep echoing bark from kind of far off >the thing circling me stops for a second >a long pause and then another bark, closer, and the thing takes off in the direction away from me and the bark >an enormous white fluffy dog comes trotting out of the treeline >Super friendly, has a collar on that says "Snowman" >Snowman and I chill out for a few hours, only once he turns his head, perks his ears and growls, half barks, and then goes back to normal >Feel totally safe with Snowman there >Eventually fall asleep with the big lug next to me, hot as hell but whogivesafuck >Next morning Snowman is gone, figure he went home after the Thing buggered off for good >Go home and scrape the brick dust out of my boxers Next day >Talking to property owner >Tell him of that night, confirm no cows were out there >Mention Snowman >He looks at me like I'm an a------ >"Snowman was my dog, he was killed by a car last year" >I wat hard and tell him I was serious, Snowman was real, I petted him and got covered in his white hair and everything and he saved my skin from whatever out there wanted my n------ for a coinpurse >He doesn't believe me until I dig the shirt out of the wash and show him the hair all over it, he says it looks just like Snowman's >Every now and then I hear a bark off in the distance whilst camping there and feel warm inside

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anon asks a girl out | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/30/23 (Mon)15:02:16 No.12098971 >like a girl >finally have the courage to ask her out >what's the worst she can say? >her reaction: >ew >gross >disgusting >you are f----- in the head >we are cousins ffs yea, "No." really is the worst response a man can get

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Anon wonders what changed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: IEGd9Cgf) How did Jews lose so much supp(...) 10/31/23(Tue)06:45:52 No.446943509 >Israel was attacked by Hamas >people are tired of muslim immigrants in the West >Jews in the West run an atrocity campaign, showing pics of beheaded babies, kidnapped/killed women, etc >somehow the biggest reversal of pro- Israeli sentiment happens Why? 20 years ago everyone would be on the side of Israel. 229 KB GIF

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