Prime delivery. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous It's Prime Day Two days of epic deals o prime day 07/11/23(Tue)23:48:32 No.643809536 Screenshot 2023-07-11 022118.png 350 KB PNG Have you gotten any good deals on games during prime day? Anonymous >>643809536 (OP) # >Turns around >Slams her giant ass into the box >Takes a giant s--- >>64381 >>643810853 # >>643813903 # >>643824816 # >>643826174 # Anonymous >>643810721 # now that's prime delivery >>643824709 # 07/12/23(Wed)00:03:58 No.643810721 II 07/12/23(Wed)00:05:46 No.643810853 # >>643811779 # >>643812708 # >>643813903 #

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Brilliant idea by Anon. Do you agree with Aoun? | /r/Greentext

>almost completely unregulated >incompatible with traffic jams >no note >no insurance needed >no license needed >fuel it with determination and whatever you ate for breakfast this morning >probably one of the most fuel-efficient vehicles in existence, come to think of it 148 KB JPG >goes as far and as fast as you can >no need for parking lots, just leave it anywhere there is a secure structure you can attach it to >and even if someone does steal it, it's so inexpensive you could literally just buy another no problem >physically improves you while you use it >plain ol' fun >minimal environmental impact >collisions are significantly less likely to kill or even injure >if entire cities were designed around these the way they are with cars, everyone would be fine with it >doesn't even need seatbelts why is the automobile viewed as the ultimate symbol of freedom again?

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Anon wants a blow job. | /r/Greentext

413 KB PNG I was hanging out with my girlfriend the other night and she's been fighting off a yeast infection so we couldn't have sex, but I was still super horny and I asked her if she could give me a b------. She said "that's not fair, what would I get out of it?" WOMAN, I'll give you a list: >got you thousands of dollars out of debt >got you a better paying job that you enjoy more than your last one >I make sure you c-- 4x as much as I do during sex >I pay for all of our meals and pretty much anything else you want at a store >I have thrown away friends for you Is that not enough???? I just wanted one b------ and she acted all sly about it "oh is baby upset he doesn't get a b------?" she literally said that before we went to bed because she saw I was visibly upset with her response. What would you anons do? Is it an unreasonable request?

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Anon's Feeling Stuck & Overwhelmed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Life in shambles 07/03/23 (Mon)20:26:07 No.73888282 2B4706D5-2DEE-4A84-A620-F2A96F32D428.jpg 36 KB JPG >turning 26 >neet since 2017 >no gf >only two frens. Both have lived and moved on >live with rents >skinnyFat >autistic >stuck in a weird liMbo >650 to my name Im just so tired

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Anon gets Shadowbanned | /r/Greentext

3h (7/11 19:03) 73990617 12 Re. 1 Img PNG 149KB (431 × 441) 1689006472856322.png 4 Replies >ignored in every group chat >kill every thread i post in >ghosted by every girl i text >rejected by every girl i ask out >never invited to anything (people actually make plans in front of me and invite everyone but me) >every service worker is rude to me >girls cross the street to avoid me >roommates leave the living room when i come out >people bump into me and just keep walking >i asked if i could partner with someone for a group assignment at school and he looked at me and just said "no" Anyone else shadowbanned from life? 3h (7/11 19:06) · 73990652 JPG 331KB (960 × 864) IMG_7631.jpg 1 Reply >>73990617 (OP) I know this feel too, bud 2h (7/11 19:47) 73991095 2 Replies Bump I know there are more of us >>73990617 (OP) You're just ugly Notoriginshdh 2h (7/11 19:55) 73991199 2 Replies 2h (7/11 20:04) 73991308 >>73991199 >You're just ugly You think i don't know that? 2h (7/11 20:13) 73991403 1 Reply ●●●● ... ●●● >>73991095 I don't even look that bad, just somehow kill a lot of social anything. Shemagh time, covering my s----- teeth might help if only a little

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Anon snaps to reality | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/20/22(Sun)13:46:38 No.71054245 >be orbiting some girl who doesn't even like me that much >post about it on /r9k/ >some incel tells me i'm an orbiter >it sticks in my head and i realize how pathetic of a person i'm being >decide to stop messaging her >a few weeks pass and i'm enjoying my time spent alone not orbiting and finding ways to motivate myself 30 KB JPG thanks anon, what you said really helped set me straight. no matter how i justified it to myself, i need to put me first. i would rather be alone for the rest of my life than put energy into someone who refuses to return the same energy back.

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Anon gets a boyfriend | /r/Greentext

Anonymous He left me 79 KB JPG 07/12/23(Wed)16:15:11 No.29339832 >be me >femanon w/bf >afraid of men, but I found a nice one >literally bends over backwards for me >ffw 2 months become a shut in and start browsing /adv/ >read all the stories about men wanting to r--- and murder me >anxiety110%.png >ffw 6 months >"femanon, I get the feeling that you just don't trust me. I think we should see other people" Are you sour c---- f------ happy? I lost the best thing that ever happened to me because you all turned my anxiety up to 11. I used to be able to say "well that anon is just being edgy" And yeah, it's mostly the men's fault, but god damn, all you other femanons who only heightened my anxiety didn't help. F--- all of you. I want to cry until I fall asleep and never wake up.

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The Truth Beckons Anon's Heart | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 211 KB GIF 10/02/22(Sun)12:54:49 No.70431230 >tell myself to lay off the sauce and dry out 2 weeks ago >start working out every day >start eating frozen greens every day >let's get in shape and do better, we're almost 40 >day passes all good >10PM hits >first cool night in 5 or 6 months >going f------ insane for a cold beer >know I will have 20 beers if I have one beer >you can't buy beer after 11 here >drive to grocery store >drive myself insane on whether I should buy beer >decide against it >my entire body is going nuts like I want a beer like you want a c-------- if you quit >go to Cane's and buy a three finger box >eat chicken tenders in car >don't want beer anymore >have a quiet night >>70431338 # were f----- tendies the solution this whole time anons. gonna have to work out more if they are : Anonymous Anon you just replaced stress eating with alcoholism. 10/02/22(Sun)12:56:30 No.70431252

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Anon has a great job | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/05/18(Mon) 08:28:84 No.78409698 Dream job thread? I'll start: >be me >from the day one i loved videogames and wanted to work on them in the future >worked very hard to get to good school 5 KB JPG >no life because of it but thought "f--- it it will be worth it" >graduated uni, one of the best students >looking for job >this one big company asks me to make video game >yaaaaas.phd >it's f------ blizzard >it's f------ diablo mobile How do i end my life?

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Anon is living the dream. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 100 KB JPG 09/06/22(Tue)08:59:00 No.8851716 >be me, in a 4 year relationship with my girlfriend, everything is going great >one day she approaches me and says she wants to open up the relationship >my heart drops, my breath catches in my throat and the world darkens as I imagine our inevitable future breakup >"not for me but just for you, I want to see you with other girls" >turns out she gets turned on seeing me have sex with other women, and even wants to join in eventually >so yeah, life is great

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Anion freezes. | /r/Greentext

KAN DE 27 KB JPG >21 >go to a gym for the first time yesterday >pay extra for a instructor to make a training schedule for me >asks if i want to look manlier for woman or girlish for man >cannot answer >he sees my confusion >>lets do core muscles today, think about it at home anon >think about it >still don't know the answer Should i go full manly mode or full femboy mode? I just want people complimenting my body and eventually have sex

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Anon has become death, destroyer of worlds | /r/Greentext

11 1608051443061.png 124 KB PNG >I willingly helped inventing the most destructive weapon on earth and now I feel bad about it how could this happend to mee AAAAAA I have become deatherino

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anon is one of them | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I am not a manlet 33 KB JPG 06/25/23(Sun)02:40:58 No.901486860 >be me >5'4" manlet >wake up >reach terminal velocity as I hop off the edge of the bed >open closet >repurposed cupboard from home depot >put on lifted shoes >get into lifted truck >nose bleeds from the altitude change >go to work >coworkers all use cumbersome standing desks to improve posture >joke's on them >I can do that with a regular desk >bathroom break >short urinal is taken >walk up to normal urinal >ibelieveicanfly.wav >execute flawless ballet pointe technique for maximum elevation while windmilling my arms backwards to balance the momentum from my stream >>901499231 # >entire bathroom erupts in applause as I finish >"You did it Anon!" >6'5" coworker picks me up and puts me on his shoulders >"You're one of us today"

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