Anon got that negative rizz | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

>had a crush in 12th grade >she's the only girl in school with fat t--- >also kinda nice idc >never talked to her before because I am not brave enough >somehow lucky enough to sit right next to her >the first day of the semester, after we sit right next to each other, I start saying hello and s--- >she didn't respond >the next day she disappeared >like straight out went missing >no one knows where's she >she left 0 trace 105 KB PNG >even her closest friends have 0 clue of what happened >her entire family went missing too >their house is straight out empty >the police still can't find the bodies or anything about them ???

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon summarizes the Russia / Ukraine conflict | /r/Greentext

02/19/23(Sun)13:19:39 No.416811139 ✓ Anonymous (ID: (Zu1+SCA) >>416811648 >>416811964 (You) 1675971565725613.jpg (492 KB, 760x521) google yandex iqdb wait BECOME UNCOVEBNI >>416809239 it isn't even really the government I'll give a greentext a shot >fed is a private bank owned by the banks it lends to >fed decides to drop interest rate after 9/11 to kickstart economy >low interest rates lead to housing bubble >treasury and fed print money to bail out banks >4.5 trillion dollars worth >people protest with "put bankers in jail" movement >banks use the money they were just given to buy up media >banks fund identity politics movements >banks use the media and identity politics to change "put bankers in jail" into "end white oppression" >gamergate exposed all of this in 2014 >after our wars in the middle east slowed down we started doing color revolutions in the middle east called the arab spring >overthrew Gaddafi because he wanted to start a gold backed african currency >egypt overthrew its government, voted in the muslim brotherhood, then had a military coup that held power until the egyptians "voted" for people the US/Israel liked >the only reason our printed money has value is because we force the rest of the world to buy oil and gas using the dollar >Gaddafi, Hussein, etc. were guilty of this >the foundation of the global financial system is the dollar, it is the world reserve currency, the only reason it has value is because everyone is forced to use it to buy the energy they need to run their countries and if they don't we overthrow their government >this is why we can print 30 trillion dollars over 20 years, give it to bankers and oligarchs, and still pretend it has value >the bankers and oligarchs have used this money to buy up all media and control all politicians >politicians don't have power, they take orders from the oligarchs and bankers who help them "invest" for massive returns >covid was another scam to create an excuse to print more money to bail out the bankers again >we overthrew ukraine in 2014 to secure gas pipelines to europe because russia had nordstream and they are capable of selling gas to europe without dollars 02/19/23(Sun)13:27:02 No.416811964 >>416812013 (You) 1675969380029718.jpg (24 KB, 349x368) google yandex iqdb wait NO ONE IS GOING TO GIVE YOU THE SPUCATION YOU NEED TO OVERTHROW THEM Anonymous (ID: [Zu1+ScA) >>416811139 (You) >there are leaked phone calls where Nuland from the department of state is picking who is going to be part of the new ukrainian government >there are emails from Hunter Biden in may of 2014 saying he can't go golfing because he is "busy taking over ukraine" >in the defense budget for 2013 they passed the Smith Mundt modernization act which legalizes the use of government propaganda on US citizens >between government propaganda and the banks owning the media, none of this will ever be discussed >the plan all along was to destroy nordstream to ensure europe would be buying gas in dollars >we also funded green movements in europe who shut down nuclear power (clean energy) and built CO2 producing gas power plants to make sure europe was buying lots of gas and keeping the dollar valuable despite constantly printing dollars to line the pockets of bankers >putin invading ukraine is the first real threat to the petrodollar system >the problem is we can't invade and overthrow putin because russia has nukes >therefore we have to send unlimited weapons and funding to ukraine because it is essential so we can maintain the value of our b------- printed money >we are sacrificing a country's people to try to keep our scam banking system afloat how was that?

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Fem(anon) prefers vidyas over socializing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 484 KB PNG >>73297653 # : Anonymous >>73297653 # 05/13/23(Sat) 08:31:26 No.73297604 : Anonymous >>73297604 (OP) # >puppywife n----- what the hell is that How old is too old to be someone's puppywife? I fear I may have spent to long as a stay-at-home daughter >>73297653 # I just preferred gay baby video games over talking to people 05/13/23(Sat)08:32:59 No.73297619 05/13/23(Sat)08:33:38 No.73297627 : Anonymous >when the adderall stops working 05/13/23(Sat) 08:33:40 No.73297628

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Anon makes a joke | /r/Greentext

File: 3247654686.jpg (93 KB, 768x1024) □ Anonymous 05/16/23(Tue)16:53:41 No.73342295 >>73342311 >>73342327 >>73342349 >be me >let my hair grow because lazy >at work >need to deliver some documents in another department >said department has a guy in a wheelchair >pretty funny and chill guy >wheelchair guy says "hey, didn't know you could use a helmet in here haha" >realize he's roasting me over my hair >people near him chuckle >ok ok anon roast back with a simple joke not related to his wheelchair >say "nice one, didn't know you could park inside either" while looking him dead in the eye >realize what i said >his smile vanishes from his face, doesn't even reply me >the same people who chuckled before are staring at me like i just kicked a puppy >entire room goes silent >quickly leave and go back to my desk Am i getting fired?

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anon cums at sleepover | /r/Greentext

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Anon does not have a tp holder | /r/Greentext

DO > have to s--- > No tp holder, so i keep the roll on top of a washing machine > Wipe my ass Retard moment inc > Throw the whole roll into the toilet > Keep the shitstained paper in my hand How the f--- have I survived to 25 /b/? [-] [-] Anonymous 17 minutes ago No.899370500 [▼] >>899369482 (OP) use your socks Anonymous 39 minutes ago No.899369482 [▼] [-] Anonymous 8 minutes ago No.899370861 [▼] >>899369482 (OP) use wet roll Anonymous 38 minutes ago No.899369547 [▼] >>899369482 (OP) > Throw the whole roll into the toilet [-] Anonymous 2 minutes ago No.899371084 [▼] >>899371115 3uu6a06c16271.jpg (28 KB, 639x639) iqdb google yandex [-] Anonymous 2 minutes ago No.899371115 [▼] >>899371084 you are a disgusting human being. I tried to use the wet roll. It wasn't something I'm proud of or would like to repeat anytime soon I think just using my hand or a towel would be better. I was left with wet poopy papier-mâché ass

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Anon speaks with his regional branch manager | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: yS8hjlYV) 05/15/17(Mon)17:57:19 No.125656937 >Boss is regional branch manager >He is really down to earth >At christmas table drinking beer and eating haram food >drink a little to much >Stand outside of office and talk >We start talking about heritage >He starts talking about his family tree >I casually reply "blood and soil" >He looks confused >I explain to him that it was a old nazi slogan >He asks me what they meant by that >l explain to him how your heritage is connected to where you are from >Start talking about the major differences between marxism and national-socialism >His face lights up >"finally! someone that understands!" >Turns out boss is pretty woke >Did nazi that coming >He reaches out his hand to shake mine >I grab his hand >His hand is a twig >I look at his face >Just branches and wood >Turns out Ive been talking to a tree for 2 hours Ayahusca is a helluva drug

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Xmas dinner doing it's thing | /r/Greentext

: onymous de 7 KB JPG 3 Replies 12/26/18(Wed)16:52:57 No.50053486 >try to s--- >break toilet View Thread : Anonymous >>50053486 (OP) # you should s--- outside like the animal you are! fat f--- 12/26/18(Wed)17:00:43 No.50053588

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Anon is self exiled | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous WHAT THE F--- AM I READING 05/16/23(Tue)12:31:32 No.899372850 1682070628757.jpg 7 KB JPG >Be me >As I grew older, pretty much a loner and I'm stating to speak with myself out loud >Got scared of my now self aware retardation >Went to a shrink >Shink confirms that I'm in deed a retard >Didn't came back ever since > No mum, s--- relationship with my father's, don't want to bother siblings. >Reevaluate all my f--- ups in life, crushing realization that obviously I've always been a retard and everyone knew but me >Crippling sense of shame >Burned all the bridges, ALL THE BRIDGES. I'm so ashamed and disgusted with myself that I dont want to be seen by no one again >Almost 2 years of self exile >Thinking on an hero myself Yikes, would it had been easier if I had a diagnosis early in my life? How do I cope with being a tard? What fire arm/caliber do I need to get to ensure I will not end up as a veggie, but also that would not make a mess when someone finds me? : Anonymous 05/16/23(Tue)12:38:02 No.899373105 >>899372850 (OP) # bridges arent burned unless confirmed as such, call up each supposed burned bridge, admit you now realize what sort of retard you were, are/were seeing a therapist about it and are looking to change the way you live to not be such an ass sucking retard in the future. you might just find you're being retarded about this and havent actually burned as many bridges as you might think, retard. : Anonymous 05/16/23(Tue)12:45:05 No.899373456 >>899372850 (OP) # retard, self-awareness is the first step out of your cage. it's the most powerful weapon a man can have. now that you are aware of your lacks you

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Anon likes Mozart | /r/Greentext

106 KB WEBP Music Then: > Could be longer than 1 hour > Complex interplay of different instruments and even voices. > Encompassing a wide variety of emotions Music Now: > Low IQ lyrics like "shoot gun" and "f--- bitches" > The same beat plays in the background of every single song. > Maybe 5 minutes long at most > The only emotions you feel are angry

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Anon needs an ambulance | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: rf46Tpl5 | 05/16/23(Tue)19:58:13 No.427233593 >>427228265 Call 911, all the blood in my body just went to my c---.

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Miss the old Elon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous GRIMES ger (X) @Grimezsz нихуя себе 05/16/23(Tue)12:25:17 No.73340180 Elon Musk @elonmusk >I miss the old Elon, >straight from the Go Elon >Chop up the soul Elon >set on his goals Elon >I hate the new Elon >the bad mood Elon >The always rude Elon > spaz in the news Elon >I miss the sweet Elon >chop up the science Elon Joined June 2009 689E5553-5E27-447D-9D9F-0068B9D4F416.jpg 415 KB JPG

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Anon takes a shit in school | /r/Greentext

No.814640123 1 minute ago poster,840x830,f8f8f8-pad,750x1000,f8f8f8.u1.jpg JPG 94.5 KiB 750x1000 >be me >In school >trying to prove my superiority by s------- in school >sit on toilet >take huge s--- >mfw i see there's c-- all over the toilet >get the f--- out of there >forget about it >1 year later find out i got hiv cause some f------ degenerate decided to j------- in school bathroom

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