Anon is a security guard | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

e: 0CF7593E-9F62-4DFD-9127-3(...).jpg (379 KB, 1048x1327) Get a job anon. I work nights as a security guard. Just sit around mostly, would recommend. Had some stress but it worked out ok. >Be me, Security guard for office building on night shift >Same fat hairy guy always works nightshift with me >See some weird code he wrote on a postit >4FA3W4, 6FB7N9, 5FA8W7 >Watch him on video cameras going in to offices >think hes stealing s--- >Im f------ scared. They would sack us both. I need this job. >Spend next week in fear, decide to ask him >"Hey bro, whats this weird code, is it for the alarms?" >"Nah anon, its locations of chairs that smell good" >"Chairs?" >"I smell the office chairs to see if they smell of p---- or ass, then I check on the building directory to see if a hot girl sits there" >"Ok cool" >IM SO RELIEVED. >He isnt stealing. >Life is good again.

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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