Anon's wife is lovely. | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous| 47078181 180.4 kB PNG 1 REPLY 21 min. ago >My wife and I have a romantic dinner >Later that night she gets into her nighty and tells me she's been naughty >No, your dinner was very good. You haven't been naughty at all. >No, I'm naughty and need to be spanked >No, you've been good and don't need to be spanked. Women, am I right? 0 IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 47078403 >>47078181 (OP) >My wife stop right there buddy, it has to be believable 10 min. ago...

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon embraces modernity than tradition | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Why are people so scared of Al(...) 03/19/23(Sun)12:41:02 No.72626755 721 KB JPG I'm f------ excited for Al. I've been seeing these new breakthroughs and advancements in Al these past couple of years and I'm legitimately ecstatic about it. Al is really making strides and I'm excited to see where it goes and how it improves our quality of life. I think anyone freaking out over it are old boomers who don't understand that this s--- is a true game changer. Like, by 2030, you're gonna be seeing some of the best entertainment you have EVER seen in your entire f------ lives because of Al. It's phenomenal. This thing can write better than hack hollywood writers. It can outdraw deviantart artists that have been drawing since f------ middle school. It's like the sky is the limit for this thing.

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Anon has a plan | /r/Greentext

127 KB JPG why not try this? >get 50 incels together >break off into teams of 5 >hang out for a little bit, come up with good things to say about everyone else in the group >every incel has 4 other guys who can talk him up >all show up to a club in similar identifiable clothing, like a button down shirt with a similar pattern and suspenders, for example >refer to the club as "the gf store" >approach women and try to hook them up with someone else on your team >always be talking up your teammates >share results between teams in meeting afterward, maybe reshuffle the teams a little bit and try again i feel like we could dig our way out of the no gf pit if we organized a little bit.

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Anon has to attend a seminar | /r/Greentext

168 KB JPG : Anonymous 32 KB PNG >>38500682 # : Anonymous >kissless hugless virgin >have to do a 2 hour online "don't r--- people" seminar for college 07/20/17(Thu)19:00:30 No.38500643 >>38500603 (OP) # >don't r--- people seminar what the fukc 07/20/17(Thu)19:02:54 No.38500672 >>38500603 (OP) # >"don't r--- people" seminar

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Anon is good towards his fellow man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous WHITEPILL THREAD Aanymous 05/06/150164520 No only you dregs be 1.61 MB PNG 03/19/23(Sun)00:40:49 No.70318182 Whitepill Thread - Ray of Hope Edition >anyone can start lifting, you don't need any prior sports experience >you can escape skinnyfat mode in less than six months >it takes less than a year for people to notice you lift >programming as a beginner is piss easy, everything works >diet is just as easy, just eat some protein and avoid fast food, candy and soda >you don't need a gym subscription to achieve a decent physique, you can get a good workout even with a pair of dumbbells from home >mires become so common they don't even register anymore >people notice you lift even under winter clothes >1/2/3/4 makes you stronger than mostly anyone you'll come across in your daily life >once you see results you won't even think about skipping the gym >consistency is the key to a good physique, even if you drag yourself to the gym you'll appreciate every single workout in retrospect >a good physique has a halo effect on anything you do >muscle building genetics don't matter in everyday life, being consistent in the gym is what makes the difference >being motivated by hope and love is much more effective than being motivated by anger 298 Replies / 75 Images View Thread

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Anon is LITERALLY DYING!!! | /r/Greentext

03/22/23(Wed)08:05:20 No.72666250 >III and literally dying >Mom told me to get my stupid ass to work tomorrow >Dad kept on insist it's my fault and especially the work of 'my phone' >Sister doesn't give a s--- and kept on looking at her phone >Brother kept telling jokes about my current situation : Anonymous 1006 KB GIF >meanwhile I am literally rolling on the floor in pain and puking every 3 minutes >this later for an hour before the pain finally stopped briefly and I decided to go back to my room for some rest instead what's wrong with my family : Anonymous >>72666250 (OP) # >Ill and literally dying 03/22/23(Wed)08:11:50 No.72666291 >has enough strength/willpower to post his s----- greentext on r9k I hope you die OP

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FatAnon vegetablemaxxes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/22/23(Wed)18:48:07 No.896314218 Im going to tell you one of my most f----- child hood memories >Be me >Be a super fat ass kid like 149 KB JPG under 8 years old >eat a f--- ton of broccoli and carrots, like a f--- because im such a fat ass like 300 pound 6-7 year old >go to pool >started swimming and there was a kid playing with me >we play and swim for a while it was fun >apparently I accidentally drank some pool water, maybe a lot idk enough to have a effect on all the s--- I ate >suddenly I need to s--- NOW! >ass just opens and completely undigested broccoli and carrots fall out my ass, my ass is just dispensing broccoli and carrots >kid just see's theres f------ broccoli and carrots coming out out my pants >w-- annon >he doesnt know im s------- them out, he just think I had that s--- in my pants for some f------ reason >of f--- oh f--- >I get out of the pool to go to the bathroom >trail of f------ broccoli and carrots coming out of my pants on the way >make it to the toilet and s--- my f------ brains out >toilet is f------ COMPLETELY full of broccoli, COMPLETELY TO THE BRIM I cant let nobody know this

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Anon is straight btw | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/22/23(Wed)22:03:15 DUDE, I FOUND THIS CONDOM IN YOUR BED! WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S FOR ME? 1638442001855.png 2.22 MB PNG No.30181570 T-Hoodie TWITTER.COM/HOODIEDRAWS ARE YOU DATING SOMEONE? IT'S TOO BIG FOR ME, SILLY! I wish I had a faggy bottom friend who comes over to play vidya and watch anime with me and keeps trying to bait me into gay situations. and doing weird s--- in my room like taking off his clothes and sleeping in my bed. I'm straight btw.

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Anon is fighting the good fight | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 294 KB PNG 12/14/18 (Fri)21:51:57 No.787382495 Got a story to tell /b/ >be me >at track meet >approached by random kid >"hey anon, have you done you civic duties and subscribed to pewdiepie?" >fuckyeah.jpg >I followed him around after that >he asked almosto everybody at the meet >he got multiple people to sub to pewdiepie Keep fighting the good fight, brave soldier.

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Anon takes revenge | /r/Greentext

>Be me, early 30's, dead end job, live with parents >Stalk all my HS bullies and classmates on their social media for years >Come across one who was particularly bad. Got expelled 6 months before graduation for dealing drugs and assault, following year was arrested for dangerous driving, hooning etc. Not sure if he was charged or convicted >Fast forward 15 odd years, find out he works for a security company that provides consulting to major companies and tech firms >His job is to find weaknesses in their security apparatus. Everything from RF scanners, lock picking to hacking >Big time industry, requires a security clearance and a thorough background check etc >Take a trip to Thailand to pound some asian p----. Go into an internet cafe and log in using the name another guy who p----- me off in school >Send an email to his firm and some of his colleagues informing them of his past. Include some old vids he uploaded onto youtube in 2007 of him doing burnouts on main roads etc >Come home, monitor his social media, LinkedIN etc 22 KB JPG >His Linkedin dissappears >Facebook goes super private >Using the 6 degrees method, find a post on of his friends IG accounts about he's a good mate who needs help and is getting f----- etc >Find out through long lost and only friend from HS that he lost is job and is now suing the other guy for spreading false information and getting him fired Suck s--- you lebo c---

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Anon is at the cinema | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 106 KB JPG 03/22/23(Wed)05:22:52 No.72663470 Can any of the more socially experienced anons offer insight into this strange interaction? >go to movie theater >two ladies and a small kid pull up and park beside me >think nothing of it, go inside >standing in line to buy snacks, keeping social distance >ladies from before walk up and stop close to me, nearly invading my personal space >one asks if I'm in line, but with an accusatory tone >tell her yeah because I am >they say nothing and scroll on their phones >her friend with the kid starts coming up to my side so I move a foot ahead because it's weird to push your child into a stranger's personal space >they start whispering to each other >people in front of me finally move so I can go up and place my order If felt like they were trying to start a problem to get a reaction from me and film it for internet clout.

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anon finds translation for Sweden’s national anthem | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 1J+f0Q1) 12/30/15(Wed)07:34:40 No.59555744 >>59555001 (OP) # Ive always dreamed about being a h-----, its something beautiful and sinful in it. Girls are really lucky, being a man suck. I realized this after 3 years of bbc&sissy hypnosis. But then again, seeing strippers and hookers in movies always gave me a boner, but only realized subconciously i would love to be the girl. Girls have exciting and fun lives. Men are disposable and worthless. >>59556012 # >>59556247 # >>59556914 # >>59557290 # Anonymous (ID: K1GKdX2X D 12/30/15(Wed)07:38:48 No.59556012 >>59555744 # Thanks, I've been looking for a translation of your national anthem for ages.

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The real covid-19 conspiracy theory | /r/Greentext

Anonymous THE REAL COVID CONSPIRACY >it actually is a chinese bioweapon spliced together with SARS, Ebola, and they think maybe HIV. >They leaked it early accidentally in december when they originally planned to release it during the 2020 olympics >chinese companies (tencent) have been bribing western media companies to say the virus occurs in nature >the infection numbers in china are 3x what they are in america 8 KB JPG 05/02/20(Sat)02:44:24 No.24856877 Friend stationed overseas just told me his higherups gave him info on whats happening with covid. what do you think x? 123 Replies / 23 Images : Anonymous View Thread 05/02/20(Sat)23:18:51 No.24864200 >>24856970 # This is at least the third time they have leaked a bioweapon on their own population. First two were smallpox.

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