Anon is a scaredy cat | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

I am scared of reddit horror stories. A I am scared of reddit horror s(...) STICKS W STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES, BUT WORDS WILL NEVER HURT ME >be me, 13 >go on reddit and search for horror stories out of boredom >got spooked >can't sleep for days after reading any reddit horror story ever since, with a feeling of dread and paranoia covering me up, making my chest feel heavy and my body sweat YOU DIDN'T BREAK A SINGLE BONE. YOU'RE A SUPER-HUMAN FREAK RIS "FREAK?" MRLOVENSTEIN.COM 03/16/23(Thu)22:54:07 No.72593198 152 KB PNG >if you type s--- like 'boogey man will get you and f--- your ass at 12pm, you can't be saved, good luck getting flayed' I unironically can't sleep >I am 21 now >Still have that response whenever I read a reddit horror story It's a natural response at this point, I know it's fake and s--- but my body just get scared everytime I read those s----- horror short stories.…....

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon finds his soulmate | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Tom Thumb 71 KB JPG 03/16/23(Thu)12:55:17 No.896001548 >be me >32 >work in the deli >cute new cashier hired >we chat it up in the breakroom >shes 18 >we both like rick and morty >she likes hard rock >she likes to blaze >I asked for her tiktok and got it >want to ask her out but dont want to f--- up are friendship I think i ve found my soulmate I think shes the one. I want to ask her out so bad but I dont want to make it all awkward and be stuck in the friend zone., what do?

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Anon watches the new Marvel Studios film | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 3/16/2023, 3:19:19 PM 29 KB JPEG MARVEL STUDIOS studios product No.23135648 > Year is 2050 >Go to theaters to see the new exciting marvel > Tyrone Stark, Laquesha Odinson, and Captain China have united to take down Kang Variant #34595. > The Kang variant is captured after a brief struggle and is forced to announce his pledge to the Chinese Communist Party > Movie ends, with a post credit scene showing the next Kang Variant arriving to Earth.

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Anon tries to watch a video | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Why does this always happen 70 KB PNG EVERY TIME 03/16/23(Thu)17:48:36 No.895996119 >be me >enjoying a video on this website called pornhub >suddenly the actors start having sec for no reason and it throws off the pacing of the entire plot

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Anon is a master of disguise | /r/Greentext

533 KB 8 replies 5 54467807 >>54467760 >what is overtraining Pretty much abs are the only thing you can train everyday, everything else requires rest time 2 replies 6 54467829 >>54467807 >abs are the only thing you can train everyday Calves too. 2 replies Can I work on biceps every day? I'm trying to get bigger arms and I only work triceps every other day, but biceps are smaller so I would assume that they recover faster. 8 54469151 >>54467829 Post calves. 1 reply 9 54469229 2.4 MB 3 replies 18 54470560 >>54469151 17 54470471 >>54470432 easier than cutting my toenails haha 3 replies 26 KB 13 54470432 >>54469229 Did you photoshop someone else's toes onto your feet? 2 replies >>54470471 20 54470588 10 KB >>54469229 >>54470432 >>54470471 >/fit/ - Fitness 16/2/20 10:09 AM 21 54470653 73 KB 16/2/20 10:11 AM 16/2/20 2:43 PM 16/2/20 2:47 PM >>54470588 >>54470560 >/fit/ >the ultimate smoke and mirrors

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anon wants real life fortnite | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/16/23(Thu)23:58:41 No.895997775 foto 2a51dd3e974d0ed3e50e95e6708ce42e-700.jpg 153 KB JPG >>895995500 (OP) # >round up all suicidal people >make hunger games battle royale but for real >if you die, you get what you want. you live, you get money etc >the arena is covered in sponsored ads real life fortnite pls

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Anon meets a girl at a party | /r/Greentext

File: 1310210340.jpg-(59 KB, 555x211, asuras wrath.jpg) > whatever, she has great t--- and im drunk as balls > f--- yeah she starts making out with me > we look for some privacy > yeah laundryroom seems fine > gives me a bj > takes off her panties and says she wants it > we start to f--- > she says she's on the pill > fuckyeah.jpg > pretty tight, not a virgin but watev s--- is cash > start slamming her > she wraps her legs around me and begs me to c-- inside > not sure if want Anonymous 07/09/11 (Sat)07:19 No.101849376 > be 18 > meet cute girl at friend's party > she's all over me for some reason > some of the stuff she says seems sketchy, like looking for a soulmate and s--- > splort inside, feels good man > after I pull out she starts pushing j--- back into her p---- > seems hot but I'm like wat > she tells me she was lying about being on the pill > wants to get pregnant so I'll stay with her forever > I flip the f--- out > She starts throwing up blood > I autochain into a sick 45 hit combo > Enter BEASTMODE > Hit her in the stomach with a lightning screw uppercut > It crits her uterus so hard it bursts > She smashes through the laundryroom wall and onto some people at the party > Channel my ki into Lv.3 Final Crusher Blast > Obliterates the house > No survivors > 1200 xp, Style S+ Skill S+ Damage S+ > F--- given rating 0.0% OH F--- I LAUGHED SO HARD Anonymous 07/09/11 (Sat)07:20 No.101849471 File1310210439.jpg-(90 KB. 333x500, Ainsley.jpg) Anonymous 07/09/11 (Sat)07:25 No. 101849750 File 1310210710.jpg-(6 KB, 236x285, bateman shocked.jpg) >>101849376 >l autochain into a sick 45 hit combo haven't laughed this hard in a while. stay classy, /vl DRUG WIZARD 07/09/11 (Sat)07:27 No. 101849865 File1310210832.png-(133 KB, 373x411, REACTION IMAGE.png) >A slick 45 kick combo Great thread OP

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Anon doesn't understand bank loans | /r/Greentext

File: bread.jpg (11 KB, 225x225) Anonymous 03/08/23 (Wed)09:19:51 No.895549798 [Reply] >>895552165 the way bank loans work in america just make no sense... >soon to be homeless guy: "so, in order to get a loan i have to prove i don't need it?" >bank clerk: "no, but actually yes" >soon to be homeless guy: "then why even offer loans?" >bank clerk: "because some people need money to get them out of a low income period or temporary unemployment, as well as investing in property outside of their current assets" >soon to be homeless guy: "so basically me?" >bank clerk: "sorry, you don't have enough assets or income" >soon to be homeless guy: >bank clerk: ... >soon to be homeless guy: >bank clerk: "ok sir i'm going to have to ask you to leave or i'll call security" is it the same in other countries? any other anons think this is b------- for new adults without friends/family?

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Anon is shy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/14/23(Tue)17:08:50 No.72573854 ✓ >Go to bar >Get beer >Drink alone because to shy to talk to anyone >Go home Wow such a life changing experience f--- normies

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Anon almost became a wizard | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 612 KB PNG 03/16/23(Thu)17:59:24 No.72593760 1 Reply >be me >failure with women >KHV until I was 28 season then.' >now in my mid-30s >most women won't leave their s----- apartment so you can meet them >the ones who do go outside are literally, actually, unironically insane >women have higher standards than ever You lied to me. I want an apology. >'don't worry bro, women in their 30's are desperate, it's open View Thread Anonymous >>72593760 (OP) # >KHV >until I was 28 >until You have to leave, Chad. 03/16/23(Thu)18:00:38 No.72593777

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Errmm... guys Anon what the freak | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/12/21(Thu)20:36:41 No.150018852 Around the Web revcontent. The Scariest Bridge in New York is Impossible to Avoid Breaking News 8ED74A5E-9750-4E8D-9F92-FD8BA82290F9.jpg 128 KB JPG USA w-- is this

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Anon gets a snack | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 687 KB GIF >Be me, a fat dude >go buy a pack of doritos because i have my cravings >see skeleton looking people wearing winter clothing because its cold outside >i only wear a hoodie over a i am genetically built to withstand >remember i could bodyslam them into the pavement >remember i could f--- their wife with my lil chubster >then make her buy me pizza >remember i could buck break a scrawny dude >one punch from my arm equals to ten of his >but then remember God made me to tank top >remember cold 03/16/23(Thu)08:28:49 No.72592213 specifically play vidya and watch one piece >smile to myself and open the doritos : EGAS 03/16/23(Thu)08:49:04 No.72592313 >>72592213 (OP) # is this a knee-jerk reaction to the thread about weight loss? : Anonymous 03/16/23(Thu)09:10:56 No.72592425 >remember that you've always been the slowest, most unathletic, most out of shape person in every PE class. >realize that these imaginary physical altercations probably wouldn't go as well as you think. Nice obese cope.

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Family fight! Family fight! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous NINTEND GAMECUB SUN 81 KB JPG Anonymous 54 KB JPG 03/16/23(Thu)17:28:38 No.895988451 What's the worst fight you've ever gotten into with a family member 03/16/23(Thu)17:40:27 No.895988860 >>895988451 (OP) # got into an argument with little bro because he wasn't studying for an exam and then it turned into a fist fight Im super skinny so he knocked me easily and punched me in the stomach until I vomited but after that he started respecting me more and he doesn't argue with me anymore even though he knows he can just beat me up

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