Anon tricks girl with flawless logic | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

I'm in a dilemma /b/. ami a bad person? >be me >be 18 >at 8/10 friend's house >watching some s----- adam sandler movie >girl with bouncy boobs on screen >"Anon, I wish I had boobs like that" >hereismychance.jpeg >"Why u can, don't u know the trick? >"What trick" >"If ur boobs are sucked regularly, they grow large." >"I don't think dat's true anon" >"yeah? why do u think pornstars have huge boobs?" "Idk, those are fake i guess" >"why would anyone pay to see fake boobs?" >"oh, never thought of dat" at this point I didn't know how to ask her to let me suck dem t------ >"same is for guys as well, the more their d---- are sucked, the larger their penis" >"what? really?" >letsdothis again.jpeg >"why do you think pornstars have such huge penis? And why do guys want to get blown all the time?" >"oh, now it all makes sense anon" >"how about we help each other out. it's a win-win" >"yes, right now? >holyshit.jpeg this carried on for 4 days and i got 7 BJs before she found out i was lying. Now she won't talk to me. does that make me a bad person /b/? Anonymous (ID: WS/G7efD) 10/31/14(Fri)16:02:48 No.576811869 no, she was a dumb slut for believing that s---

Share Pin Download More

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: png

Resolution: (629px x 523px)

File size: 92.3 KB

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

View All 43,684 Images

More:

Anon and the cum box | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/11/17(Mon)15:03:09 No.41713546 32 KB JPG >keep putting my c-- napkins in a cereal box >start f------ the box and c------ into it like a fleshlight >starts to get soaked with rotten c-- and looks disgusting so i stop f------ it >still c-- into it from a distance and keep jamming c-- napkins in for months >cleaning my room earlier today >decide to throw it out >realize how heavy, compressed, and solid it is now, a solid brick of c-- napkins >manage to tear it out of the box >literally had to stomp on it to break it into two pieces and it won't flush down the toilet >trash is full and no one else is home so i decide it is the right time to burn it >put it on an old car hood in my backyard and light it on fire and smoke a c-- while it burns >entire neighborhood smells like burned c-- now

Pin

anon wonders what JK rowling was thinking when she wrote this controversial harry potter scene | /r/Greentext

le: 1650081877331026.jpg (85 KB, 657x480) Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)11:15:30 No.181196405 >>181196420 >>181196425 >>181196948 >What's the matter Harry? >...Harry? >H-Harry! HARRY STOP! W-wai >...ahh...ah...ah... >Ohh... good... ness... >Harry...h-harry...HARRY! >y-you came inside... >You... YOU BETTER TAKE RESPONSIBILITY! Or else so help me Harry James Potter I will sit on your face until you learn your lesson! What was J.K. Rowling smoking while she wrote this?

Pin

Anon wonders if his friends would grief for him | /r/Greentext

02/26/23(Sun)18:48:44 No.72372946 My childhood "friends" won't go to my funeral once I die. Maybe their parents will do it, since some of them are friends with my parents. But my own "friends"? Nah, they will hear I died, they will shrug and just keep doing whatever they were doing in that moment. Some other friends will never know I died because nobody will tell them. So bassically, nothing I ever did or said will matter. I will probably kill myself soon. And no "friend" will ever care. I haven't talked to them for like 7 years. But I keep dreaming about them every God damn night. I keep thinking about them. Why can't I move on? : Anonymous you can easily return to the past but no one is there anymore 119 KB JPG

Pin

anon is Venezuelan | /r/Greentext

File: 1677555362722250.png (925 KB, 760x1086) Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)13:20:31 No.72407422 [Reply] Im 15 cm and pretty thick yet i still feel small as f--- Cant imagine the pain people with less than me go through Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)13:21:00 No.72407426 >im 15 cm bros a bedbug Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)13:40:12 No.72407556 >>72407581 >>72407426 Where the f--- you live n---- O Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)13:44:08 No.72407581 File: beetle.jpg (37 KB, 500x500) >>72407556 >>72407556 venezuela n----

Pin

Anon doesn’t understand girls | /r/Greentext

601 KB JPG and shamed like one Anonymous Am I the only one who understand how girls can't can walk out dressed like this in public & not be asking for it? Why dress like a slut, if you don't want to be treated >>35175420 # 02/27/17(Mon)14:41:22 No.35175116 >>35175089 (OP) # but they are asking for it just not from you

Pin

Anon fucks up big time | /r/Greentext

/v/ - Video Games Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:06:01 No.459443806 >>459444131 >>459444212 >>459444351 >>459444487 >>459444502 >>459444553 >>459444685 >>459444879 >>459444890 >>459444905 >>459445053 >>459445313 >>459445493 >>459445682 >>459446376 >>459446550 >>459447064 >>459447101 >>459447328 >>459447352 >>459447668 >>459441153 >used to walk home from the bus stop every day with a cute tomboy in highschool and we got relatively close >she signed my yearbook at the end of senior year, but I never bothered to look at it >never saw her again after high school >looked back over my yearbook for s---- and giggles after about 10 years, turns out she left her phone number and a message saying that she wanted to hang out with me in the summer and to keep in contact I f----- up ANGRY WELSH NOISESS at a V Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:09:31 No.459444212 File: 1371254366387.png (30 KB, 341x317) Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:19:58 No.459445313 ► File: Angry Seiba.png (608 KB, 1162x808) - I al daye 00 SAMAN for A A LIVE You are not f-----. OF Here tip WERDE Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:31:53 No.459446550 >>459446673 >>459446692 >>459446737 >>459446761 >>459446776 >>459446813 >>459446862 >>459446971 >>459447026 >>459447062 >>459447064 >>459447165 >>459447260 >>459447328 >>459447352 >>459447453 >>459447507 >>459447545 >>459447553 >>459447571 >>459447668 >>459447674 >>459447806 >>459447945 >>459447965 >>459448105 >>459448114 >>459448194 >>459448212 >>459448463 >>459448501 >>459448573 >>459448591 >>459448691 >>459448714 File: Untitled.jpg (2.03 MB, 4032x3024) >>459443806 >>459446550 WHY DID YOU POST THIS IT HURT LESS TO READ WHEN I THOUGHT IT WAS FAI DELETE THIS NOW >>459443806 HOW DO YOU F--- UP THIS BADLY YOU TROGLODYTE, YOU HAD THE CHANCE I WILL NEVER F------ GET AND YOU F------ NUKED IT >>459445493 I misremembered a couple of the details since its been a while, but here BREAKING NEWS 15:38 АААААААААААААААААААААААААААААААА >>459443806 F--- did not f--- up. I'm so glad we parked next to each other! Every morning on my way to school I look forward to walking in with you! I'm also really happy we had economics we will have to, hang out sometime this summer text mes M You could not have f----- up. This s--- is beyond regular f------ up. Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:41:08 No.459447571 ► > File: 1256614531835.png (78 KB, 374x252) You f----- up so hard that you went all the way around and are nov on the opposite side. Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:21:45 No.459445493 ► >>459446550 >>459443806 >>459444502 no you didnt AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Was she cute? Adm het w Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:36:37 No.459447064 >>4594472 File: 04e810b9-1871-4c9a-bf39-5(...).jpg (69 KB, 662x610) in the ce you ga >>459443806 >>459446550 It's been some time since I was this mad. by wh Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)20:11:02 No.459450737 ► File: 1554038483573.png (150 KB, 499x499) CHI >>459443806 >>459446550 АААААААААААААА >>459446550 I don't even have words. The madman wasn't bullshiting and just made me want to go hard drinking. Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)20:24:44 No.459452219 ► File: Hellboy-beer.jpg (27 KB, 340x306) Anonymous 07/2 INTO >>459446550 this is a f----- on an unprecedented scale no words can describe how unfathomably, File: 1460056942333.png (345 KB, 498x568) >>459446550 I have the urge to kill myself just reading this Had it not been for the laws of this land, I would have slaughtered you. incomprehensibly F----- this is jesus h christ this belongs in a f------ textbook Avitus 731% MAD mi Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:36:37 No.459447062 ► 13-30 KABA CHURCH 1&2 Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:08:47 No.459444131 ▸ File: 1552354040136.jpg (30 KB, 561x421) >>459446550 This is an elaborate joke right? right? 味味A >>459446550 She's probably happily married now, maybe even has kids. Girls like that go fast, the only ones usually left on the market are emcels with no personality. It's for the best though. Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:54:44 No.459449054 File: Avitus.png (97 KB, 400x355) Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)19:17:16 No.45944505 Man, this thread is just making me sad. >>459443806 Damn son, you blew it. >>459443806 Jesus christ anon, that hurts my soul >>459446550 I CANNOT TOLERATE IT ANY LONGER Damn. How can you live with such mistake? I'd have searched for her immediately after seeing that message. Maybe there's still time. >>459446550 I AM GOING TO KILL YOU F------ N----- I AM IN ABSOLUTE RAW F------ AWE AT HOW ONE MAN CAN BE SO I HARDLY HAVE A REACTION IMAGE THAT CAN F------ DESCRIBE HOW MAD I AM, JESUS F------ CHRIST GENUINELY KILL YOURSELF. YOU LITERALLY HAD EVERYTHING SET OUT TO YOU ON A GOLDEN PLATTER AND YOU F------ BLEW IT ALL. F--- YOU. 100% Nuclear DOWN TONIGHT WHY? Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)20:12:43 No.459450913 ► ABSOLUTELY F------ RETARDED AND OBLIVIOUS >>459443806 It's been an hour and I'm still f------ enraged. God f------ damn it. Anonymous 04/21/19(Sun)20:27:35 No.459452520 ► I though I could walk this off and beat my d--- to forget about this but NO I'm too f------ second hand angry. Jesus christ I haven't been this upset about something so petty in MONTHS. Maybe more than a few years.

Pin

Anon has a Selena Gomez sighting | /r/Greentext

File: 1677225481051361.jpg (156 KB, 1170x1261) Anonymous 02/24/23 (Fri) 22:15:14 No.181024833 >>181024854 >>181024868 >>181024928 >>181024978 >>181025030 >>181025979 >>181026946 >>181027202 >>181027239 >>181027964 I heard selena gomez went into a restaurant, and ate everything in the restaurant, and they had to close the restaurant

Pin

Anon browses r/atheism | /r/Greentext

File: 1677567715430332.png (70 KB, 860x850) Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue) 18:57:10 No.72399414 ► >be me >atheist >never lost an internet debate with a dumb religitard >97 year old great grandmother is dying of cancer >visit her one last time in the hospital >family gathered around her deathbed >she says "at least I get to be with my husband again" >outrageous >tell her that the concept of heaven and hell are made up fairy tales to keep people in line and that she's going into the ground just like everyone els >she dies >family won't talk to me anymore >not invited to her funeral Christfags and their silly fantasies BTFO'd once again. >> Anonymous 02/28/23 (Tue)18:58:14 No.72399426 ► christards btfo and on suicide watch Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)19:09:19 No.72399496 ► THIS MONKEYS GOING TO HEAVEN

Pin

Anon goes to the zoo. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/01/23(Wed)16:24:55 No.72407127 >be 6 years old >mom took me to the zoo for the first time >was super excited to see all the animals >saw a sign that said "don't feed the animals" 28 KB JPG >thought it meant don't feed them bad food >decided to share my sandwich with the monkeys >mom looked away for a second >next thing I know, the monkeys have stolen my sandwich >I start crying and mom scolds me for not listening to the sign >fast forward 20 years >still salty about the monkeys stealing my sandwich >vow to never trust a monkey again >go to the zoo and see the same sign >laugh to myself and buy a hotdog instead >monkey starts motioning for me to throw it to him >give him a little piece >monkey gives me a little thumbs up >guess not all monkeys are bad after all

Pin

Anon Senses a Plot | /r/Greentext

. 4h (2/28 18:26) · 72404843 · 16 Re - 0 Img PNG 220KB (512× 422). 07CBDD09-EF1D-41C8-A25A-E17795F3E3C6.png 3 Replies >Very beautiful girl with a fine ass body in my college program keeps getting very close to me in random settings >will seem to stand very up in my personal space any chance she gets >did it in front of her boyfriend a few times who is also in our program which lead to so awkward exchanges of glances between him and I I think she is trying to instigate a fight between me and her bf so she can get horny from her Chad bf beating me up

Pin

ooga booga | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: OWN8F7w/ 03/01/23(Wed)07:08:06 No.418023517 >>418023048 (OP) # True story: >At a party at the age of 19 >Drinking >Talking to a girl with big booba >Someone makes a Hitler joke >I say: "Hey man, my grandfather died in a concentration camp." >Record scratch party stopping moment >I conclude: "He fell of the guard tower." >Everyone laughs, including big booba >l glance at her jiggling t---. >Star of David on her necklace >We fugg in the basement later My first Khazar Milkers, lads. It was glorious. 1.92 MB GIF >>418024197 # >>418024392 # >>418024909 # >>418024967 # >>418026798 #

Pin

Anon has an idea for a movie | /r/Greentext

File: picture_1677631906433.png (2.43 MB, 1920x1920) WILD 02/28/23(Tue)22:06:48 No.181186652 Rate my idea for a movie: ☐ Anonymous >Christina Hendricks is the mother of Sophia Lillis and is a successful woman who was abandoned by her husband and because of that she feels alone, devalued and sexually frustrated. >Sophia Lilis is a horny but shy bisexual teenager who has difficulty relating to others and because of that she feels sexually frustrated. >Bryce Dallas Howard is Sophia's aunt and Christina's sister and is a free, open-minded and daring woman. >Upon learning of her relatives' plight, Bryce decides to help them express themselves sexually, and so makes plans to bring mother and daughter together sexually while also inserting herself between the two. >Christina and Sophia have sex and find they love each other deeply and then things get better. >To thank her sister for her help, Christina invites Bryce to dinner and at the end there is an intense o--- that lasts for hours between the three of them. >After this they live a happy life with lots of sex and exploring their deepest sexual desires. >"Cherry Pie" by Warrant plays during the credits It's kino?

Pin

Know Your Meme

Like Page 1.8M likes