Anon is bad at predicitions... Or is he? | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

The weather has cooled (ID: a0cDyNbe A warning 01/02/23 (Mon)23:40:42 No.410676212 Timeline of the next few days: >January 3-7: Ukraine war escalates at an unprecedented rate 78 KB JPG >January 9-10: Futile attempts at negotiation >January 11-13: Full nuclear exchange between NATO and Russia. China may join as well. Top stories : >January 8: Russia drops nuke in uninhabited area as a show of power and threatens to nuke NATO if they don't withdraw from the Ukraine This will be your only warning. If you survive, carry a 4 of clubs so we know who to trust. Memorize the following phrase and say it to fellow survivors so we can identify each other: >The bear has left its cave and now the rod and ring await This will be your only warning. Russian President Vladimir Putin on Thursday ordered a unilateral 36-hour cease- fire in Ukraine from noon January 6 to midnight on January 7, the same time as Orthodox Christmas. The Kremlin said Putin was influenced by Russian Orthodox leader Patriarch Kiril in making the decision. 2 hours ago DW Russia announces temporary cease-fire in Ukraine 1 hour ago https://www.dw.com > russia-announces-temporary-cease-... ! Russia announces temporary cease-fire in Ukraine - DW up The Washington Post Russia-Ukraine war latest ? About featured snippets Feedback CAN CNN Russia's war in Ukraine: Live updates LIVE 28 mins ago The Independent Putin orders 36-hour ALE 7101CL BLIR -3

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon is scared of rodents | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: xr66V+lm) 01/05/23(Thu)17:14:06 No.411029051 >>411028495 >22m and live in HMO >cooking alone in the kitchen last night >mouse runs out from behind the fridge >scream the N word at the mouse at the top of my lungs >mouse dies from a heart attack or some s--- >throw it out the window >the other residents won't talk to me and don't believe in mouse

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Is this community an undercover gay sub? Who writes those? Show yourself! | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 41 KB JPG 01/05/23(Thu)23:39:54 No > Why are all greetext either extremelly gay or schizo? > Who writes those? Is this one person? Or are you all genuinelly just craving being toped? > I am confusion

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Video game waifus save the day again | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/28/19(Mon)16:37:56 No.483230194 21 KB JPG >get to the piano ghost melody >develop crush on her >force parents to buy me a keyboard and take me to piano lessons >eventually get really good at it >ffw 3 years >playing the piano at some department store while waiting for my mom to finish shopping >be me >9 at the time >playing luigi's mansion for the first time >girl from my school sees me "wow anon i didn't know you played that good" >turns out she's also a piano f-- >get her number fuckyeah.jpg >ffw to today >still with her >going to college >probably gonna major in music >mfw this all started cuz i had a crush on some ghost bitch from luigi's mansion thanks luigi

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anon gets asked about his wife | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Hace 11 horas >>623279437 (OP) >be me >teenager >mom loves wow >can't go out with friends until chores are done >chores include running her dailies on wow >eventually she gets me my own pc/account >meet girl on there, fall in love >talk on wow for 4 years, meet in person for holidays >move in together for college >get married after college >have 3 kids together co-worker small talk: so anon, how did you and your wife meet? 623293362

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Anon wakes up again | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 130 KB JPG 01/05/23(Thu)18:01:23 No.892102362 >wake up >sit on the edge of my bed >stare at the ground for a bit >start yelling f--- as loud as I can >go on with my day as usual everyday

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Anon receives a bitter revelation. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous VERY SAD 80 KB PNG 01/05/23(Thu)14:57:55 No.71706471 >>71701699 (OP) # >Create sims 4 character in my image >Give him all of the personality traits I have >Get him a job similar to mine >Buy a nice little house arrange it somewhat to my liking >Play the game >Literally just goes to work, browses the internet, plays video games, watches TV and occasionally has a mental breakdown and cries hysterically. >Creeping realization... >Try to talk with other sims >Convos go badly, make my sim even more depressed >Sim is constantly on edge and angry >Me IRL can't even begin to think about how to fix him >Bitter revelation...

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anon rarely brushes his teeth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous BY shutterstock 457 KB JPG 01/06/23(Fri)01:56:38 No.892099178 >be me >lazy f--- who goes multiple days without brushing teeth at a time >breath smells fine >basically if im not meeting people I don't brush with a few exceptions >go dentist after 7 years without seeing one >"how often do you brush anon?" >"gee golly sir! once in the morning once at night! making sure to floss in between every tooth oh boy yes i do!" >"wow anon your teeth look good!" >"just a couple cavities on the right side but other than that you're looking good! Gums are perfect!" >"why gee sir I thank you!" What the f--- is going on here? Why are my teeth not falling out?

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anon has a dark secret | /r/Greentext

File: image-asset.jpg (266 KB, 1920x1080) Anonymous 01/04/23 (Wed) 22:53:16 No.178787557► >>178787672 >>178787715 >>178787749 >>178789776 >A 36 year old man who's never been in a relationship, never held a job, and never left his parents basement. Truth is stranger than fiction, and yes this happened. To many people, Anon was just a regular kid, but he held a dark secret. He started posting on 4chan in high school and 20 years later, nothing has changed.

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Anon doesn’t want to be straight | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous It's over for hetro bros 356 KB JPG 01/05/23(Thu)14:21:53 No.71705163 >naturally attracted to females >meme gender >TikTok addict >starbuxx addict >believes in horoscopes >will cheat on you >wants $10,000 engagement ring >barely have same interests >sjw acab blm circlejerker >decisions mostly based on emotions >finding female that is truly compatible with you, appreciates you because they think you have intrinsic value is more rare than going 1 day without seeing CP on 4chin Why couldnt I just be gay? Get bbc on demand through grindr any time, and genuinely have a more trustworthy and meaningful relationship.

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Anok had a dream | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 141 KB PNG 05/15/22(Sun)19:12:24 No.878231975 >be me >Kidnapped >Taken to weird facility >I get placed on an automatic rolling factory line, not sure what it's for >Mechanism pulls my pants off, start to worry >Next mechanism forces me to have an erection, I'm confused >There's a lot of tubes, one of them latches onto my penis >Needle comes out and pokes my d--- to numb it for some reason >Tube gets blades, quickly slices my d--- off entirely, for some reason I'm so stunned my reaction is minimal >Guy at the end of the line let's me go >Walking down street and I meet someone who just came out of the same facility >"Are you missing your c--- too" yeah I said >Start getting depressed as I realize I'll never be sexually satisfied again for the rest of my life, start crying >Wake up, it was all just a bad dream >So grateful that it wasn't real that I almost start crying >So grateful I decide to beat off again Why am I like this?

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Anon doesn't receive an acceptable amount of nuggets | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 6 KB JPG 1 Reply 01/05/23(Thu)15:32:42 No.71701092 >Go to McDonalds >Ask for 10 Mcnuggets >Pay for 10 McNuggets >Receive box of nuggets >Does not contain at least 11 nuggets View Thread : Anonymous next time get two boxes and pretend 01/05/23(Thu)16:07:34 No.71701452

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anon rips off onlysimps | /r/Greentext

File: attention.png (10 KB, 225x225) Anonymous 09/19/20 (Sat)09:16:40 No.60108393 [Reply] >>60108483 >>60108567 >>60108633 >Friends with an Onlyfans thot >she gives me 15% of her monthly earnings for logging in and interreacting with her simps while pretending to be her >mfw I just talk about guy s--- like video games and they're all super into it Anonymous 09/19/20(Sat)09:17:48 No.60108400 Pretty based desu I have deep respect for people who separate retards from their money

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