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Dumbledore Chicanery copypasta
Uploaded by chausies Jan 04, 2023 at 03:09PM EST
chicanery copypasta chuck better call saul albus percival wulfric brian dumbledore harry potter 4chan greentext copypasta
Origin Entry: Dumbledore-posting
File type: png
Resolution: (1102px x 411px)
File size: 260 KB
![[159/59] Anonymous Mon 19 Sep 2022 00:55:23 No.612590597 View Reply Original Report Quoted By: >>612591249 >>612591371 >>612592124 >>612592417 >>612592512 >>612592605 >>612592767 >>612594497 >>612595561 >>612595632 >>612596831 >>612597183 >>612598701 >>612598996 >>612600586 >>612600884 >>612602814 >>612602994 >>612603316 >>612603361 >>612603651 >>612604468 >>612605809 >>612606154 >>612606980 >>612607759 >>612609060 >>612609130 >>612611315 >>612611487 >>612611609 >>612614464 >>612615427 >>612618596 >>612618647 >>612618882 >>612622271 >>612625081 >>612627038 >>612627431 >>612627592 >>612629407 >>612629549 >>612630007 >>612643770 >>612644071 >>612644831 >>612647090 >>612647362 >>612647643 >>612647670 >>612650179 >>612651956 >>612656670 257KiB, 1080x810, Polish_20220919_151714088.jpg View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO >>612656867 >HAAAAARRRRY POTTER DID YOU PUT THE GTA SOURCE CODE INTO THE GOBLET OF THE INTERNET" dumbledore roared, shaking the very foundations of the wizarding world, calmly. >"No sir," Harry answered promptly "it was a p---" >Dumbledore looked in half-amazement, took a deep breath to calm himself, and screamed racial expletives so strong that somewhere, in the middle of getting pounded by 20 inch ginger c--- in the library, hermione granger winced in the throes of white woman-POC empathy. >" CURRY MUNCHER!, TUMERIC HUFFER!" dumbledore exclaimed "DIAGON ALLEY S------! LITERAL MUD- BLOOD! DOOKIE THE HOUSE ELF! HE-WHO-MUST-NOT-BE-SMELLED" >"Whats more," Harry added whilst handing dumbledore his phone midst the tirade, "He sent us the ransom demands" >Dumbledore squinted his eyes, slowly reading through the contents of the electronic letter that the leaker had sent him, and then proceeded to get even angrier. >"SIX MILLION GOLDEN GALLEONS!? WHAT KIND OF MONEY DOES HE THINK HOGWARTS HAS? WE BARELY HAVE ENOUGH FUNDING AS IT IS, WHY DO YOU THINK WE HAVE GOBLINS OVER? SLAVERY IS ECONOMICAL, POTTER! And whats more...he wants to meet a certain "Bob" and "Virginia"!? Who on earth are these people? Could he talking about Robert Dunsley from Ravenclaw? Goodness knows, potter, all i know is i cant pay this up!" >Harry nodded in agreement, "i guess you have to take extreme measures, sir?" >"INDEED I WILL. Potter, contact Moaning myrtle and ask her to coax the indian students from their natural habitat- she lives there after all, and bring them to me. I PROMISE YOU I will have them strung up like chicken ready to be made into butter masala if they dont reveal which one of them it was. ILL STARVE THE LOT OF THEM, OR MY NAME ISNT ALBUS DUMBLEDORE WINSTON CHURCHHILL THE 2ND"](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/507/710/836.png "Dumbledore angry about the GTA 6 Leaks")
![Anonymous Sun 12 Jul 2020 02:35:40 No.516597187 Quoted By: >>516597310 >>516597609 >>516597852 >>516597957 >>516600174 >>516600879 >>516601809 >>516602434 >Hermione: He called me a t-----. >Hagrid: He did not! >Harry: What's a t-----? >Hermione: It means transvestite. T----- is a really foul name for someone who's born in the wrong body. Someone who doesn't have the proper genitals. Someone like me. It's not a term one usually hears in civilized conversation. >Hagrid: See the thing is, Harry, there's some Terfs, like the Rowling family, who think they're better than everyone else because they're what people call "real women." >Harry: That's horrible! >Ron: [stretched his legs to burp up another slug] It's disgusting. >Hagrid: And it's codswallop to boot. "real women." Why, there isn't a person alive today who hasn't wanked it to a ladyboy at one time or another. More to the point, they've yet to come up with a bathroom our Hermione couldn't get into. Come 'ere. Don't you think on it, Hermione. Don't you think on it for one minute.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/507/678/edf.png "Hagrid explains muggle slurs")
![[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] File: 1579177888545.png (916 KB, 760x573) >he said calmly >"Welcome students, welcome to another year here at Hogwarts. To our First Years I have a few notices I wish to announce. An unmarked, random room in this castle will kill anyone entering it. It is such because I decided to hide an extremely dangerous and powerful artifact at this institution for children. Please also note that if you enter the schools forest, it will be a very painful and certain death from the dozens of ferocious creatures roaming it." >"Despite being the safest place in the world for wizards, there is a coin flips chance that one my employees this year is on first-name basis with the most evil wizard in living memory. I am of course speaking of VOLDEMORT. Yes, I said his name. I am not scared for my life, but you should be. Which one is it this year? Personally, my bet is on professor Snape." >"I am also pleased to announce that the quinquennial Death Tournament will be held this year. The three underage contestant will endure three deadly trials for no other reason than my personal amusement. I encourage anyone from monetarily struggling families to enter so that you can recover from the outrageously expensive and gratuitous equipment we require you to purchase to attend this school. You dont want your family to starve do you? So please enter! Speaking from experience, casualties are frequent and amusing.' >"Lastly I need to address the elephant in the room, or rather the snake in the room. I personally distrust and loathe the members of the Slytherin House, and as such, if Slytherin wins the House Cup through effort and hard work, I will overthrow the result by giving arbitrary points to whatever house I feel like" >As the students get out of their seats and scramble out of the main hall, Dumbledoor looks across the teachers table with a mocking grin >"Severus, see me at my office immediately. We need to discuss your Lily-cuckold situation" Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:04:27 No.135389095 ▶ >>135389213 >>135389270 >>135389416 >>135389435 >>135389671 >>135389707 >>135389761 >>135389772 >>135390108 >>135390157 >>135390590 >>135390926 >>135390954 >>135391110 >>135391287 >>135392027 >>135392436 >>135393511 >>135394226 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135394569 >>135394763 >>135396458 >>135397014 Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:06:58 No.135389169 ► >>135394959 >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:18:46 No.135389449 Did their parents have to sign release forms? Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)02:20:27 No.135389493 ► >>135390787 unironically this is exactly how I imagine a powerful wizard would behave Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)02:21:43 No.135389531 ▸ File: 1592451439150.gif (1.57 MB, 500x251) >mfw dumbledore imperius cursed a harem of underaged witches and filmed them again >mfw dumbledore spiked everyone's drinks with veratiserum over christmas Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:03:14 No.135390487 ► >>135390580 >>135390640 >>135390662 >>135390695 >>135391577 >>135392213 >>135393209 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135396458 File: 1592129573743.png (1.56 MB, 1600x667) >Also children I would like to let you know that for my own amusement I have hired a squib to clean the school despite the fact that magic would make this a trivial task for anyone else /tv/SPOILERS For disturbing images. www.4chan.org >Feel free to curse him as much as you would like as he cannot defend himself. >Also I have another anouncement >Notorious criminal Sirius Black has broken free from prison, so to ensure your safety we have littered the school grounds with demons that suck out people's souls and eat happiness >That will be all, have a nice year Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:05:19 No.135390532 ► >>135394951 I wonder if there is a market for really attractive people to sell bits of their hair for polyjuice potion. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:07:11 No.135390577 >>135390761 >>135390821 >>135390850 >>135391122 >>135391703 >>135393133 >>135393255 >>135394363 >>135394512 File: Lipetit.png (522 KB, 646x463) Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:07:40 No.135390590 File: Spoiler Image (25 KB, 360x450) >Children you may notice my pet m----- has died. He has been replaced by another, whom I procured at no small expense. >You will address Mr. Davis as Professor Lipetit from now on. We will pretend he is the same m----- I previously owned. If any aurors show up and ask what happened we will say Professor Lipetit merely charmed himself to appear younger. >The Professor will be seated next to Hagger, as the discrepancy in the sizes of these two freaks amuses me greatly. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:10:09 No.135390640 ► >>135389095 (OP) >One final thing students, and listen closely >Any student caught practicing BLACK magic >turns and looks directly at pic related >will be punished severely >N------.. ah I mean BLACK magic should be reported immediately and they will be lynched.. ah I mean expelled. >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:11:08 No.135390662 >>135391465 >>135390487 >we also have a number of elves we keep as willing slaves. >feel free to gawk and point at their grotesque appearance and perhaps laugh if you must. >*stares down the grainger bitch* >>135394853 >>135390487 >Notorious criminal Sirius Black has broken free from prison, so to ensure your safety we have littered the school grounds with demons that suck out people's souls and eat happiness >Also, he was a good friend >under no circumstances will you attempt to organize a slave revolt. >it ended poorly for the elves last time, but hagrid was well fed for weeks afterwards >oh, and due to avian flu concerns, the owl rookery...yes the one full droppings is off limits and all delivery owls are to be culled at once. >now...let the feast begin! Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:14:17 No.135390737 ► someone post the pasta about Dumbledore hanging trannies or something Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)03:14:06 No.135390731 >>135390846 >>135390879 >>135391173 >>135391249 >>135391613 >>135392063 >>135392218 >>135392469 >>135393209 >>135394363 >>135394512 >>135394724 >>135395032 >>135396458 File: 1592442603910.png (470 KB, 524x522) >Dumbledore is peacefully working in his office >Suddenly the door opens >In walks an African student wearing the proud black and red robes of Gryffindor, a symbol of a racially equal wizard society >Dumbledore shrieks in terror and goes for his wand, points it at the intruder and screams RIDDIKULUS >Dumbledore breathes a side of his relief as the bogart retreats back into the castle Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)03:32:12 No.135391110 ► File: 1553704332113.jpg (75 KB, 586x580) Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)06:16:39 No.135394512 File: 1561662063818m.jpg (22 KB, 332x1024) >>135390731 >>135390577 >>135390487 >>135389095 (OP) >>135389095 (OP) >It is such because I decided to hide an extremely dangerous and powerful artifact at this institution for children. >Speaking from experience, casualties are frequent and amusing. Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)06:17:00 No.135394520 File: vernkino2.jpg (118 KB, 496x635) >>135394428 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)06:27:48 No.135394713 ► >>135394730 >>135394833 >>135394975 >NO RONALD, I WILL NOT START CALLING YOU RHONDA, HOGWARTS WILL NOT STAND BY SUCH DEGENERACY! YOU WERE BORN A MAN AND A MAN YOU WILL STAY! CRUCIO! MAYBE THAT WILL TEACH YOU! Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fri)06:10:12 No.135394363 File: 1590781332524.jpg (33 KB, 493x386) >>135392619 >>135392965 >>135393013 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:42:09 No.135392639 ► >>135392662 File: 1523676910833.png (142 KB, 359x363) E Anonymous 06/19/20 (Fr)04:46:10 No. 135392704 ► File: 1.png (298 KB, 524x522) >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:43:39 No.135392662 File: Minase.jpg (52 KB, 640x480) >>135392639 Delete this >>135389095 (OP) >>135390487 Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)05:13:37 No.135393293 File: 1571707200431.jpg (113 KB, 990x990) >>135390577 >>135390731 >>135392004 >>135392027 RIDDIKULUS >N------.. ah I mean BLACK m BLACK magic RIDDIKULUS >he said calmly Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)05:08:39 No.135393190 ► File: 1591391119923.gif (1.07 MB, 150x200) >>135393356 >>135395230 >>135395883 >Yes, I said his name. I am not scared for my life, but you should be. >>135392577 >You will never be a teenager locked in a school all year with other horny people your age with access to magic and potions that can make any fantasy come true. / 338 / 85 if youre a girl and you use polyjuice to transform into another girl and have sex while transformed, do you keep your hymen? Anonymous 06/19/20(Fri)04:44:45 No.135392681 ► File: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH HHHHHH.jpg (49 KB, 500x354) >>135392619 >HARRY F------ POTTER DID YOU WRITE "ALL LIVES MATTER" ON THE WALLS OF THE THIRD FLOOR CORRIDOR WITH THE BLOOD OF MR FILCHS CAT! >THE MUGGLES IN HOGSMEADE HAVE STARTED RIOTING! THEY'RE ON THEIR WAY NOW TO TEAR DOWN THE STATUE OF GODRIC GRYFFINDOR HIMSELF! >PANDEMONIUM! BLASPHEMY! >OH YOU THINK ITS FUNNY DO YOU? WELL IT WOULD BEMUSE YOU TO KNOW THAT YOUR FRIEND MS GRANGER HAS BEEN MISSING ALL DAY. THEY'RE PROBABLY DEFILING ALL HER HOLES AS WE SPEAK! I DON'T NEED TO REMIND YOU HOW MUGGLES LUST AFTER OUR WOMEN DO I? >YOU KNOW SOMETIMES I CAN REALLY SEE WHERE TOM WAS COMING FROM, I REALLY DO. ALAS ITS COME TO THIS. GRAB YOUR F------ WAND AND PUT THIS POINTY HOOD ON. WE MUST SECURE THE EXISTENCE OF OUR PEOPLE AND A FUTURE FOR MAGICAL CHILDREN. >HEIL GODRIC! >he said calmly](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/507/673/2b1.png "Dumbledore gives the start of the term speech")
