Anon has friends | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

> be me an hour ago > have little friends but none that i really trust > always worried that people always talk bad s--- about me behind my back > get added into a group chat with class mates and the "friends" 65 KB PNG > they were playing a couple texting games in the group chat like truth or truth Messenger recently added this thing where you search up a word and all the stuff they said using that word came up > have idea to search up name > type Anon > all results came up positive and well > all sentences that used my name were stuff like > anon is a pretty cool guy > Two girls even said i was pretty cute > self confidence grows and my friends actually really cared about me Dont worry anons it will all be fine for you ifunny.co

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Pedo mods pedos mods pedo mods | /r/Greentext

12:35 M ∞ ← r/greentext You've been permanently banned from participating in r/greentext A r/greentext • 9m You have been permanently banned from participating in r/greentext. You can still view and subscribe to r/greentext, but you won't be able to post or comment. If you have a question regarding your ban, you can contact the moderator team for r/greentext by replying to this message. u/Intelligent Signal66.7m What was the reason? 4GH Reminder from the Reddit staff: If you use another account to circumvent this subreddit ban, that will be considered a violation of the Content Policy and can result in your account being suspended from the site as a whole. r/greentext • 5m figure out yourself Reply to message r/greentext. 5m You have been temporarily muted from r/greentext. You will not be able to message the moderators of r/ greentext for 28 days.

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Anon makes a good decision | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 56 KB JPG 12/21/22(Wed)22:23:04 No.891171508 >My gf of five years sat me down and asked for an open relationship >She said since I was the only one she'd ever slept with she wanted to experience a bigger variety of partners before we officially settled down and got married >I asked if she was serious. >She said yes. >I asked her a second time and again she said yes. >I told her okay. I want a list of whoever you want to sleep with and I have to approve it. No exceptions. >She looks weird but agrees. >I tell her that we will start this on Monday (Its Thursday) >She agrees >She goes to work Friday >I load up my trailer and pickup, to the brim, with everything I could possibly consider mine, and move it a storage locker. >I then go back and proceed to load up everything of hers and put it on the lawn. >I call my uncle and tell him we wont be going through with renting the place since I can't afford it alone and why this happened >Uncle says I can stay and he will lower the rent >Go back to the storage locker and move all my s--- back >Exhausted as f--- >Go outside, put s note on her laptop >Note reads: I've accelerated our timetable, our relationship will exclusively be open starting today. Enjoy. >Text her mom why I did this (she was a nice lady) >Text my mom, dad, and friends why I did this >It took everything I had to not break down and cry after I woke up Saturday and she was no longer by my side. I didn't want to do it but I knew if I said no she would have either left me first or gone behind my back anyways. Remember anons; Once a woman has a past she no longer deserves a man with a future.

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Anon watches The Joker | /r/Greentext

>be me >go see joker alone >laugh at all the deaths >smile the whole time >i can tell people are getting nervous because of my superior sense of awarenes 42 KB JPG >it gets me aroused >when the joker starts dancing i get up and dance along with him, keeping eye contact on the screen at all times >someone asks me to sit down >"who so serious?" I growl, and then laugh hysterically >i clench my stomach as I launch and turn back to the screen >i continue dancing >someone calls me a "dumbass" >i stammer about no longer being able to get my medication >i stare at him intently >he faces away from me >some guy who looks half my f------ age actually says I have to leave >I laugh on the way to the counter to get a refund >they refuse and say I need to leave >i dance across the foyer, everyone is staring >grab someone's bag of popcorn from their hands and skip away >throw handfulls of pipcorn into my face, missing most of it >laugh hysterically on my way out >mfw ifunny.co

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The good stuff doctor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/21/22(Wed)19:47:29 No.891161810 >2015 >off from work so smoke weed at 10am >go to doctor for a minor issue at 3pm not realizing I smell like weed >doctor: "hey anon you smell interesting hahah have you been smoking anything fun?" >n...no I don't smoke 126 KB JPG >"hahah ok anon I'm only asking because if you ever need to buy any good stuff, I can probably help you" I changed my doctor after that but what the f--- was that? Did my doctor offer to be my plug for weed?

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Anon got outed | /r/Greentext

1598591939473.jpg 170 KB JPG >coworker saw my gosling folder

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anon is the modern Marcus Aurelius | /r/Greentext

Marcus Aurelius: "If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment." Marcus Aurelius 2022: @trad_west_ Anonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.

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anon’s :) computer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 3 07 dº :} ackup history and F6 ):< 4 8 Replies F7 9 R P 11 2 D FB - C M 5 00 : Anonymous >>10524124 # F10 E C 0 (0) C 6 . 12/21/22(Wed)01:37:55 No.10524106 0 AFA H + 2 V IMA 0 0 delete 0} B ZONE ] 0 1 1 " M 1671561467373.jpg 748 KB JPG (9) 9 > 0 13 return H₂ 5 shift command ▼ S option ► View Thread 12/21/22(Wed)02:05:00 No.10524135

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anon learns the hard way that Santa isn’t real | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 23 36 KB JPG 12/21/22(Wed)14:19:06 No.71485619 Smart kid: >Figure out Santa can't be real Dumbass kid: >Parents eventually have to tell you Santa isn't real Me: >8 years old >Ask Santa for a Chao (Sonic Adventure 2) for Christmas >Parents assure that Chao aren't real >I insist that Santa is magic though and can make a Chao anyways >Parents give arguing and hope I forget within the next 3 months until Christmas >I don't forget and still insist that I get a Chao >Parents are forced to break it to me that Santa isn't real because I tried to exploit magic View Thread

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Anon likes clay | /r/Greentext

DANIEL JAMES CET DANIELLE M CERI FISHER Died 4 January 2019 Aged 32 Years Rest in Power! Adered By All Anonymous (ID: E6Y2604w) 02/17/21 (Wed)11:56:16 No.308528739 >>308527034 >t-----'s fake identity is a cheap paper/cloth flag that will deteriorate and wither without constant maintenance and repair >t-----'s true identity is carved in stone, unchangeable, and still obviously visible behind the t----- facade Pottery

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anon wishes us all a merry christmas | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 67 KB JPG 12/21/22(Wed)17:40:40 No.891139073 >It's Christmas Eve, and I can't wait for tomorrow. >Woke up extra early, full of excitement and anticipation. >Went to the living room to see if Santa had come yet, but the tree was still bare. >Decided to make some hot cocoa to warm up, and sat by the fireplace to wait. >As the hours ticked by, I started to get a little anxious. What if Santa doesn't come this year? What if I've been naughty and don't get any presents? >But then, just as I was starting to lose hope, I heard a faint jingling sound. I ran to the window and saw Santa's sleigh flying through the sky, led by a team of reindeer. >Santa landed on the roof and started to slide down the chimney, and I knew everything was going to be okay. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

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anon luls at pilots | /r/Greentext

37786 FG-786 lol USAR 0 U.S.AIR FORCE feed me Germans.jpg 957 KB JPG >early f-104 starfighters had downward-ejecting ejection seats >this was soon redesigned to normal upward-ejecting ejection seats >there was a period when both were in service >pilots had to remember in a split second which one they were in; do you do a 180 and then eject or no? >apocryphally this did leave to some fatalities

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Anon takes the communist pill | /r/Greentext

Anonymous best parents 4 KB JPG 11/08/20(Sun)16:32:34 No.60826016 >be other communist countries >don't set up country like a commune >itsintheliteralfuckingname.jpg >fail and people die >be Cuba >an actual commune >prosper and people are happy Take the Cuba pillanons

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