Anon forgor | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous 01/08/21 (Fri) 18:25:39 No.844343540 Deletehistorywith22.jpg 41 KB JPG >get new laptop >give old one to aunt >suddenly remember i forgot to delete my files and browsing history >mfw

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Anon questions some design choices | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous worst designs in biology 125 KB JPG 12/10/19(Tue)05:07:31 No.11214649 >physically weak >even the strongest specimens have only 1/10 the strength of a bear >"intelligent" >only about half of the population intelligent enough to make a difference >babies take 9 months to be born >and 15 years before they are useful >body too hot for semen to be produced >testicles need to be outside the body >put them in the warmest place possible why has humanity survived this long with such a retarded design?

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It just works TM | /r/Greentext

255 KB PNG >It has custom >mfw Thanks, Todd >Be me >Playin Fallout >Come across a deathclaw >Had a sex mod installed for s---- 'n giggles >Forgot I had it installed >Deathclaw f------ assrapes me sound

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Anon gives dating advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/02/18 (Wed)17:08:54 No.45836085 >>45834564 # You should act a bit more alpha so she thinks you're a Chad, try messaging her "get your t--- out now or I'll f------ kill you. >>45837596 # Anonymous05/02/18(Wed)20:35:42 No.45837596 >>45836085 # do not do this

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Anon wishes he could shoot Christcucks | /r/Greentext

m 272 KB JPG >You will never be North Sentinelese >You will spend the day teaching your sons to hunt with spears >You will never spend the night plowing your harem after they cook your prey >You will never shoot an American missionary with arrows and get away with it >You will instead work 50 hours a week in McDonalds and marry a thot

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Anon learns that no good deed goes unpunished | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10 KB JPG 12/13/22(Tue)12:18:28 No.890691927 >be me, always hated bugs as a kid, especially spiders and centipedes, and would always kill them >as I grew up, I learned that they ate pests and were beneficial to homes and outside >eventually I left spiders alone but still killed centipedes because they're scary >Last night I saw a centipede in my bedroom and decided to leave it alone for the first time >go to sleep proud of myself for letting an innocent animal live >get bit in my sleep I don't understand /b/ros, the one time I ignored the centipede, the f----- bit me. Is this payback or something? Jfc, my arm is killing me

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anon has an encounter | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >5'7", 120 lbs >Get called "big guy" by the dude at the counter handing me my order : Anonymous Was it a big order 12/06/22(Tue)07:48:41 No.71278567 : Anonymous >>71278567 (OP) # Probably being sarcastic >>71278642 # baku3.gif 2.26 MB GIF : Anonymous >>71278567 (OP) # 12/06/22(Tue)07:50:49 No.71278592 12/06/22(Tue)07:51:29 No.71278599 12/06/22(Tue)07:52:37 No.71278609 Who's my best little man? Who's a good boy? LOOK AT YOU, out on your own!!! And shopping!!! Wow, you're such a BIG BOY!

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Anon and Al | /r/Greentext

10:58 : Anonymous >be me, 7-8 >have cousin who was 13 >great dude, was p chill and loves video games >our favorite game to play back then was samurai warriors 2 coop >although started acting weird one summer that I decided to stay over >would pull down my shorts and would try to literally f--- me any chance he can >told him to stop and threaten to tell on him >he says that no one would believe me and I'd be in trouble too >would pester me and tell me that he'd just do it once 9 KB PNG 12/12/22(Mon) 22:58:24 No.890633394 Been almost a year so I can now get this off my chest >scared, I finally cave in >hurt like hell and I felt like absolute s--- >go home and cry myself to sleep, knowing that I'll never be able to tell anyone Fast forward to 8 years ago >same cousin had a seizure and collapsed on the stairs >they find tumor on his brain >he fought it for 7 years >died last year due to the tumor spreading to his spine >didn't weep a single tear >pretended that I was distraught to family >happiest I've ever been F--- you, Al. Go burn in hell. =

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Anon Discovers The Internet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous THE INTERNET RUINED MY LIFE 12/12/22(Mon)12:08:38 No.71370095 157 KB JPG >be outgoing kid >have lots of friends and play outside every day >Tween years hit >get a laptop with internet access >Instantly hooked, start spending all of my time online >stop making new friends, only make online friends >fast forward 12 years later >accomplished nothing in life >no friends >not even the internet is fun anymore

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Anon learns how to Reddit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 7 KB JPG 12/06/20(Sun)09:21:50 No.841726614 >be me >use reddit for first time >create account >log in >immediately have fantasies about sucking d--- My lord, i never have had a thought about sucking c--- in my life. What is that energy that radiates from that site? Its...fagotizing

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Anon has a Galaxy note 10 plus | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/12/22(Mon)23:01:21 No.71372230 >girl at bar asked out big my d--- was >I have a galaxy note 10 plus >know my d--- in about an inch longer than that phone >tell her to hold out her hand >her hand is tiny >put my phone in it >"about an inch longer than that" >she ends up blowing me behind the bar like a drunk bitch That was a good night.

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Anon has trauma | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 37 KB JPG 12/12/22(Mon)16:30:50 No.890654271 >be >7 years old >at park with dad >on the merry go round >dad starts whipping the merry go round around like a slave driver in the deep south >my 7 year old hands are too weak >grip slipping >yell at dad to slow down >even he cannot resist his own power >keeps spinning >grip keeps slipping Oh no >fly off the merry go round like a missle >land on my back like 7 feet away >still skidding across the ground like in an anime >back full of splinters >dad laughing maniacally >why have forsaken me father

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Anon encounters a mythical being. | /r/Greentext

196 KB JPG >Be me >chilling in the bathtub >pull up a p--- and grab lotion Finna jerk it >run water while doing it >suddenly water starts turning white and sticky w--.jpg >hear some weird scratching >turn off water >can hear it better >recognize the sound >that dragging sound in the walls >I've heard it before >nozzle bursts and 2 r--- dwarves shoot out >grip my c--- >start sword fighting with d---- >catch one off guard and wack it outcold.jpg >the other one bites my d--- >i instantly c-- >the orgasm distracts me >r--- dwarf jumps on my face and starts c------ in my nostrils >grab him with right hand and squeeze the f----- as hard as I can >explodes into green slime Not even the pipes are safe, which means no more water. Gonna have to drink my own piss from now on. Wish me luck bois

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