anon f---- your therapist | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous (ID: kBkDrsgv 10/31/18(Wed)13:38:48 No.11591846 203949A5-02BF-4C88-93A1-CCAC4A00F4DF.jpg 157 KB JPG Stop caring. That's literally all you have to do. Just imagine this pepe everytime you get mad, sad, anxious, jealous, etc

Share Pin Download More

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext cartoon organism gesture happy

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: png

Resolution: (1052px x 1474px)

File size: 1.13 MB

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

View All 43,691 Images

More:

anon has a stroke | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous GENERIC CIALIS Tadala Tablets USP 5 mg By 09/13/22(Tue)07:42:47 No.885559557 40 KB JPG I'm 67 years old. My grandson was getting in a lot of trouble at school. He told me about this site. Now I read it for fun. This is my Greentext >Be me 67 year old Anon >I can't get it up anymore, because I'm old and have s----- blood pressure >My doctor prescribes generic Cialis >It's a low dose that you take daily so that you're ready whenever >When I was 13, I started thinking about a Playboy I'd found and this one girl in class had a really tight sweater- you degenerates have it easy today >I got a raging erection. The bell rang for the end of class. I tried to hide it, but everyone could tell it was there. >The head of my engorged c--- rubbing against my jeans made me blow a massive load. >A few days after I started Cialis, I went to the grocery store. There's this sexy 20 something cashier. >I got a massive erection. She could see it, the simple kid bagging groceries could see it, and the family in line behind me saw it. >The head of my engorged c--- rubbing against my slacks made me blow a massive load >I hadn't j----- in maybe 6 months because of the impotence. >Everyone saw my orgasm face and heard me make the sound a man makes when he fires off a load >At least half a cup of j--- was running down my leg >Luckily I'm old, so I pretended it was a mini-stroke and that I'd p----- myself. >It was believable and everyone forgot about the obvious erection from moments ago >The grocery store manager called an ambulance. I spent a few hours in the emergency room, and they sent me home. >Second best orgasm ever

Pin

Greentext classics: Frog Dad | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/02/10(Thu)21:42 No.80240XXX My dad would punish me with psychological torture. Drove me nuts. Here's an example: >As a kid >Tell Dad to F--- Off because I'm playing Super Nintendo >Dad, displeased at my French, begins to formulate his plot >Wake up the next morning >A small beanie-baby frog is on my pillow >Scares the crap out of me >Shrug it off >Go to eat breakfast >Pour cereal >Small beanie-baby frog comes out of box >What the f--- >Go to school >Backpack feels heavier than usual >Check middle pocket >Filled with, like, ten frogs >Am thoroughly scared now >Look out window to daydream as I often do >Beanie baby frog on outside windowsill >freak out in class >Sent out to hall >Get home >Pitch black because lights off and drapes pulled >Turn on light >ENTIRE F------ KITCHEN FILLED WITH BEANIE BABY FROGS WHAT THE F--- >Scream >Heavy knocks on door >Turn around >Man in frog suit pressing his face against the door > Scream >Run up to room >Lock the door >A single frog in the middle of the floor on top of a piece of paper >Lift up frog >Take note >Read note >"Open the door, son." >Scared, open door for frogman >Frogman, silently, slowly walks up to me >"I know it's you, Dad," I say. >He says in a voice nothing like my father's: "It is not, Anon." >I scream >He takes mask off >It's my Uncle >My dad comes into the house laughing like an idiot >l p----- myself >Dad laughs and says, "We don't say F---' in this house, boy. Now who's up for McDonald's?" Seriously Dad where did you get all those f------ beanie babies from

Pin

anon is high as a kite | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 348 KB JPG 04/06/22 (Wed)13:19:24 No.68093745 >be me >with a friend >We're both high as hell in LSD and 2C-B >My friend says "I'm going to my room i'll be back soon" >"ok" >*a minute passes* >"OH S--- HE'S KILLING HIMSELF" >I run to his room >I knock the door >"Man, are you killing yourself?" >"no bro i'm playing fallout new vegas"

Pin

anon performs black magic | /r/Greentext

Pin

Anon Asks An Innocent Question... | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: kKulvIE1) HADR 10/08/22(Sat)17:53:02 No.398885251 swgjd91zp6091.jpg 1.05 MB JPG ADE Whatever happened to the Reddit Volunteer Army in Ukraine? Did they all die?

Pin

Anon can't satisfy his gf | /r/Greentext

12:15 O Anonymous 10/14/22(Fri)23:04:11 No.887339132 >Move in with GF after a few months of dating, s---- good >Find out she masturbates constantly 17 652 KB JPG >CONSTANTLY >Just sitting around watching tv, typing on her PC, scrolling social media, whenever she has a hand free it's in her underwear fingering herself >We had sex pretty often before I moved in and we still do now but i'm self conscious about the whole thing >Sometimes I ask her if she's in the mood for sex when I see her doing it and she says no before going back to masturbating >Other times she says we can if i'm in the mood and just sits there while I do everything and is just really disinterested >We still have sex a few times a week where it's normal but no matter what happens she just keeps masturbating like i'm not there It's been two weeks and i'm not sure how to bring it up. She never did this at my place and never does it in public but in her apartment she just fingers herself all the time. I don't know how to bring it up. A boards.4chan.org/b/threa 2 r |||

Pin

True Love, 4chan style I guess. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 295 KB PNG 12/15/21(Wed)15:04:47 No.66575792 >girl I've been paying $600 a month to be my girlfriend says she's caught feelings for me and has started refusing my money >gave me back $1800 out of the $3000 I've paid so far >says she'll give me back the rest when she gets the money >wants to see me more often now What do I do now? Anonymous >>66575792 (OP) >What do I do now? enjoy your gf for free? 12/15/21 (Wed)15:07:20 No.66575822

Pin

Anon ia god | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: xmdLKhfH 10/14/22(Fri)21:04:19 No.399820335 Kidneys From a Genetically Altered Pig Are Implanted in a Brain-Dead Patient >>399822316 # Surgeons at the University of Alabama at Birmingham said they hoped to start clinical trials with kidney patients later this year. pig god.png 1013 KB PNG 口 Dr. Jayme Locke, left, and Natalie Budd prepared t abdomen of the patient to receive the pig kidney at University of Alabama at Birmingham. Jeff Myers/ >NOOOO YOU CAN'T JUST TINKER WITH MY LEGOS

Pin

Anon appreciates the beauty of nature | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/14/22(Fri)18:48:42 No.70589824 >>70585127 # >Doing acid with some friends >Sitting around on a patio >It starts storming, intense wind and heavy rain >Everything feels like a dream 201 KB JPG >Sky was this purplish color >We thought a tornado was coming because the wind was so intense >Wasn't scary, just cool >One of my friends is letting himself get showered by the rain >Join him >It feels awesome >This lasts for a couple hours The rest of the trip was pretty fun but at one point I lost my shirt so there were some stressful moments. I've also seen the birth of Christ on DMT but you had to be there.

Pin

Wholesome greentext | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 72 KB PNG 01/03/19(Thu)01:55:21 No.788966543 I know nobody is going to care, but I need to share it with someone >be me, 20, never had a girlfriend/been with a girl before (actual sperg) >decide to have a kickback at my house on New Years Eve; 10 or so people just smoking weed and watching movies >one of my best friends, who i've known since 7th grade is there >she's just chilling with her head in my lap, which is normal since we're pretty close >solid 7/10, always had feelings for her, just too awkward to make a move, and i figured she was out of my league >I pass my controller to one of my friends when all the sudden she pulls me down >kisses me on the cheek, and after the initial shock I kiss her back >we end up making out for a couple of minutes, and spend the rest of the night in each others arms >texts me the next day to tell me that she's had feelings for me for a long time, but she was too afraid to tell me >I tell her the same thing We're now dating, and i've literally never been happier before. I know it was a s----- story and nobody cares, but I don't have a lot of friends and I had to tell someone

Pin

anon is femboy and a disappointment to society | /r/Greentext

Anonymous DR 289 KB JPG 05/10/22(Tue)01:05:07 No.68561944 >female friend invites me to watch cartoons with her and her friends >pretty fun >they want me to watch stuff with them next week too >get invited to their group discord >they call their weekly cartoon / anime watching girl's night >ask why they invited a guy to girl's night >they say I don't count >ask why >"you're basically a girl" What the f---? I'm a 6'1 man

Pin

Anon might get doxxed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 51 KB JPG 10/15/22(Sat)00:39:17 No.89214235 >makes employees spent hours blurring everything around his house during video editing so internet weirdos can't track his house location >visits Amazon using personal laptop during a livestream and leaks his full address to 16K viewers You can't make this up

Pin

Know Your Meme

Like Page 1.8M likes