anon has the nut of his life | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous Is this it? If you see this whilgenrolling You have been cisited by Pete knows is very tired and s peacefullend your life in you ep soon But only if you smotivate Tue)08:50:1 >Be me >Be 5 minutes ago >Have the best nut Ive ever had in my entire life, feeling of nutting drawn out over a solid 90 seconds of ecstasy, eyes rolled into the back of my head for like 30 >Not to nudes >Not to regular p--- (do not watch, it is for cucks) >Not with any woman >Not with my wild imagination >But to f------ Fortnite pov p--- Is this it? Should I just kill myself? How the f--- did I go from dropping bombs on cavemen in Afghanistan to this. 142 KB JPG 5730

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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The crackpot | /r/Greentext

File: happy pepe.jpg (305 KB, 1600x2000) TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA /crockpot/ Anonymous 11/18/15(Wed)11:38:34 No.34956962 ► I'm thinking of buying a crockpot. Is it any good? I just want to cook frozen vegetables and chicken breast. Anonymous 11/18/15(Wed)11:40:59 No.34956999 ► >>34957017 >> Crockpots are awesome. Put the ingredients in in the morning and it's ready to eat when you get home. Anonymous 11/18/15(Wed)11:42:04 No.34957017 ► >>34956999 (You) I never leave the house, but I get what you're saying.

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Anon is a Sinophile | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 81SGq7P2) 12/15/21 (Wed)13:54:13 No.352227367 >>352220227 # The entire history of China is >Ching dynasty established >Chong rebellion >Chong seige the capital of Ching >1 million casualties >50,000 civilians cannibalised >Chong dynasty established >>352227556 # >>352227750 #

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Anon has post nut clarity | /r/Greentext

Anonymous P--- is for P--- boards 09/27/22(Tue)20:37:40 No.886354127 289 KB PNG a few funny p---------- facts: >addiction to p---------- functions similarly to the chemical dependency on cocaine >the earlier you start using p----------, the more likely you are to form a drug addiction >some studies suggest it reduces grey matter in the brain >P----use being OK is a lie perpetuated because it brings in more money than the NFL, NBA and MLB combined >watching p---------- doubles the rate of divorce >the more you watch p----------, the more likely you are to watch "minor intercourse" >erectile dysfunction is rising by the day >the parent company of pornhub has a history of human trafficking monetization >p--- use is rising in adolescents, resulting in higher rates of depression and decrease in academic performance Quit now and end these mental restrictions >sneed

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Anon thinks anime teenagers are based on real life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Seriously? So, t your first time drinking 1.32 MB PNG 09/25/22(Sun)22:46:39 No.27378658 >Watch anime >Characters having interesting experiences, earning money, pursuing goals etc. >Look up their age >They're in their teens How do I cope?

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Anon has an interesting hypothesis on cheating | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>886340550 (OP) # The weird truth is that women tend to cheat down. Many times when women cheat it's due to reasons that isn't sex. Like insecurities and thinking they're ugly. They cheat down because that gives them more of a success at satisfying whatever f----- up problems they have in their heads. 09/27/22(Tue)09:31:29 No.886341699 Also statistically dudes with bigger d---- get cheated on more. Not s------- you, look it up. Weird huh? But seriously it's way easier to get an attached woman than you think. Easier than a single woman in some cases. Almost can be done in steps. Get close to her and get to know her until you're familiar on a "friend" level. Start inquiring about her relationship, complain about your relationship or past relationships so she can "relate". Get her to the point that she complains about her relationships with you. Next just get her to spend as much time as you as possible since she will build you into whatever she needs in her head. Now start drinking alone with her and the first kiss and you have an affair. Now it's the chick that will f--- you at first sight with no work on your part...that's the Chad zone. Get hella fit, dress well, talk suave. It's really not a big achievement. Women are built to cheat. ›>886341853 # >>886343682 # : Anonymous 24 KB JPG >>886342639 # 09/27/22(Tue)09:35:10 No.886341853 >>886341699 # >Chicks risk everything to be with ugly dudes, not chads >They also cheat more on big dicked chads than little d--- betachads >The way to seduce a woman is to get her to friendzone you deliberately >??? >Profit

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doesn’t understand | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 54 KB JPG 06/07/22(Tue)07:00:31 No.67081872 doing everything right: >hit the gym a couple times a week >clean diet >>67082078 # >1.5/2.5/3/4 >cut down to 10% bodyfat >stil look f------ yoked >haven't showered in months for pheromone gains >succesful career >wear nice clothes >nice haircut >generally friendly guy with natural charisma basically: i'm lifemaxxing but anytime I get a date on tinder they will leave in a matter of minutes. What the f--- am I doing wrong? Am I too big? or too small? : Anonymous >>67081872 (OP) # autistic, anon, you're autistic 06/07/22 (Tue)07:04:31 No.67081905

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Anon reads manga | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >be me, 29 yo KHV >for the first time in my life, I have a female friend who talks to me while hiding the disgust she has for me from her voice, unlike every other woman I've ever talked to >met online thanks to manga, talk mostly about the manga we have read >we have a sort of 2-person book club thing going on where we'll read the same manga >latest read was Oyasumi Punpun, which I've read before, but I love it so much that I don't mind the reread >she seems to really like it too, we spend a while talking about it every day for the past week >Eventually she gets all serious and says "Answer me this honestly, it's important. Do you think Punpun is a bad person?" 1 4 09/27/22(Tue)03:40:05 No.70366962 58 KB JPG >I'm really confused why this is so important when it's just another aspect of the manga, like the hundred other aspects we've discussed >I say "He's an awful person, it's surprising he gets as good an ending as he does" >She seems disappointed in my answer because she just says "oh" and goes quiet >When I try to keep the conversation going, she says she has to go and logs off without saying bye Am I wrong? Punpun is a bad person, right? What answer did she want?

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Anon On Tears In Rain | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/26/22(Mon)18:17:40 No.174734575 BR-edb0bf4.jpg 54 KB JPG >I seen spaceships my n---- Seriously?/

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Anon learns that no good deed goes unpunished | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10 KB JPG 09/27/22(Tue)11:32:57 >be me, only child to single mom >she starts dating a deaf guy >she learns sign language to be with him but I haven't because he's not around much when I'm home No.886346634 >the relationship gets more serious and the guy seems cool so I decide to learn sign language so we can converse with each other better >decide to keep it a secret from them so I can surprise them on his birthday >once I get pretty good I decide to try and interpret their signing as practice >big mistake >immediately horrified at the sheer amount and level of dirty talk going on between them at any point in time >can't remove the thoughts of knowing how "robust' my mom thinks he is or how "using sign language made his fingers stronger wink wink" KILL ME NOW

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anon finds the little mermaid | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 73 KB JPG 08/10/21(Tue)09:06:09 No.125014102 >meets a disabled 14 year on the beach, completely naked >attempts to marry her without once trying to find our where her parents are : Anonymous >>125014102 (OP) # Finders keepers. 08/10/21(Tue)09:07:48 No.125014133

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Anon is a kind person | /r/Greentext

Small acts of kindness are something we can all do to make our lives less s---. There is no excuse not to do stuff like this. >Be me >Uni student depressed 96 KB JPG >Walking to nearby liquor store to numb the pain >Tourist trap store on the way >Sells tacky souvenirs and whatnot >Go in on a whim >Postcard is like f------ 25 cents >Buy one >Wake up next morning with hangover >See postcard >Look up online how to fill it out because who the f--- knows how to fill out a postcard in current year >Fill it out >Send to mom and dad >Just like two banal sentences about how I'm doing ok (a lie) and how I hope they are taking good care of my cat >Like 5 days later >Mom calls me to say how much getting that postcard meant to them >Says it made their entire week >Don't drink myself to sleep that night for the first time in a long time

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Anon has a dilemma | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 136 KB PNG >autistic 09/26/22(Mon)15:57:45 No.70361928 >in my 30s >fat >bald >5'8" >lazy eye >live with my parents >unemployed rn would any fembot date me? or just talk to me Anonymous Anonymous : Anonymous Anonymous >>70361928 (OP) # Lose weight and ill talk to you 09/26/22(Mon)16:03:38 No.70361988 09/26/22(Mon)16:03:52 No.70361993 09/26/22(Mon)16:03:58 No.70361995 09/26/22(Mon)16:08:02 No.70362051

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