Shortstaff, short shaft | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous 65 KB JPG 08/10/22(Wed)17:01:48 No.69755198 >get a text from my manager in the group chat >PLEASE, WHOEVER IS OFF TODAY CAN YOU PLEASE VOLUNTEER TO COME IN? ANYBODY? WE'RE UNDERSTAFFED! Lol, no thanks. I'm gonna j------- to hentai and smoke pot all day.

Share Pin Download More

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: jpg

Resolution: (1080px x 635px)

File size: 221 KB

File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

View All 43,684 Images

Moar:

Anon’s daughter plays metal gear rising | /r/Greentext

>married, with a six year old daughter >wife hates violent videogames and doesn't want me playing them with daughter in same room >my little girl loves some of the violent stuff, but I do draw the line obviously >she absolutely loves, loves, loves Raiden, Sam, and the MGR: R cast of characters. Mostly likes Raiden and Sam over the rest of them. >get a phonecall from school, saying she was in a fight. >have to leave work and address this mess >principal explains to me that she punched a boy who made fun of her, stood over him and said, "Show me a good time, Jack." >I almost, almost started to laugh and had to brush it off like a cough. >had to ball my fist over my mouth, excuse myself. >"Anon, do you have any idea where she learned this?" >"No sir, but I will talk to her about it." >We made it five steps into the parking lot before I lost my s---, imagining my daughter standing over some little s--- with her arms spread saying, "Show me a good time, Jack." >got her ice cream, had a heart to heart, and had to play it down when wifey got home Kids are a treat sometimes.

Pin

Anon is a Doctor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/10/22(Wed)07:30:43 No.883633418 >Be me, Dr. Anon. >Spend 9 years going through medical school, residency, and fellowship >Get a job in the ER. >A lady comes in, overdosed on Fentanyl >Narcan, put her in the vent for airway protection. >She finally wakes up. Buck f------ wild on the vent. I talk to the ICU doctor, he says no reason to admit her. She's good and we'd have to really sedate her to keep her on the vent. >Take her off the vent. Bites me. Draws blood >Refuses to take a HIV or hepatitis test. Have to take the prophylaxis. Get diarrhea. 50 KB PNG >Her boyfriend comes. He's a "club promoter." Thanks me for saving her life. Tries to recruit a couple of nurses to make a movie with him. Security kicks him out. >$400,000 in student debt >I was a weeb in high school and college. Never left my room, just drew s----- manga, and s--- posted on 4Chan. Decided to straighten my life out >Look at me now. FML

Pin

anon is a prophet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous HOLY BIBLE KING JAMES VERON 234 KB JPG 07/14/22(Thu)00:43:46 No.69400717 I'm a (diagnosed) autistic incel. When I was a child I liked to read but my mother only had a Bible, so I memorized entire sections of it. I met a 37 year-old woman a while ago (I'm 22) and she ended up believing (for whatever reason) that I'm a prophet of God. I am very lonely so I started to entertain her delusion and now I feel like I can't come back. We are together and she says she considers herself my wife. I like her and she behaves like a mommy gf so I don't want to lose her but I feel like this s--- will end up crashing and burning. What the f--- should I do?

Pin

anon is dreadful (repost because i broke rule 4) | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 59 KB JPG 03/31/21 (Wed)17:56:24 No.63001106 >Feel like I should be doing something >Don't know what >Vague sense of uneasiness that I'm not doing it

Pin

Anon picked the wrong side | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous My 8 KB JPG 08/10/22(Wed)06:41:50 No.69753491 >it's Odin mfw >be me >atheist ass the whole life >on my deathbed >really want to see heaven before going to the void >murmur "I accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior" as breathing the last breath >everything becomes white, I can see a gate >"aww sweet this is heaven"

Pin

Anon outsmarts his superiors | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/24/21(Sat)00:53:44 No.852792905 19 KB JPG >be me >Tuesday at school >it's 5th period and I'm bored as s--- >turn to my friend and say "don't come to school on may 2nd lol >next day I get called into the guidance counselors office >start talking about how they think I'm dangerous and that I'm gonna shoot up the school >mfw May 2nd is a f------ sunday

Pin

Anon wanted a rifle | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 309 KB JPG 08/09/22(Tue)13:26:33 No.54721473 >be me >14yo >birthday, asked for a rifle so dad takes me to cabelas gun library >interested in milsurp, spot a No.4 Mk.1 Enfield >$400 >reach out >intercepted by picrel >smiles at me, says "sorry bud" >unironically tips hat >only other surp is out of budget or 91/30 Mosin nagant >end up buying mossberg 590 I f------ know you're on here you fat bastard. F--- YOU. That Rifle is now >800 dollars.

Pin

Anon doesn’t understand why Liverpool is named the way it is | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/10/22 (Wed)21:27:51 No.69753565 >liverpool >not a giant pool full of livers

Pin

anon is in a predicament | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous MY GOD HE'S NOT EVEN IRONIC 578 KB JPG 08/09/22(Tue)21:57:16 No.883597694 > hey anons. > I met someone on a game i play and they asked me if i had a discord to add me. > I complied and added them, we talked for a while and hit it off, we both share a lot of similar interests and love for similar things such as music, food, shows and games. > They also told me they were a femboy, I didnt mind and we kept talking casually. >>883597929 # > recently they have started calling me stuff like "senpai" and making more sexual jokes and references such as last night they said "good night daddy :3" > i just played it off as a joke. > are they also joking or am i in too deep? Anonymous >>883597694 (OP) # n..no senpai, you need to stuff his b..bussy 08/09/22(Tue)21:59:54 No.883597834

Pin

Anon watches Andrew Tate | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Andrew tate ruined my internet 08/10/22(Wed)15:28:25 No.69751223 32 KB JPG >people wont stop talking about this dude >Andrew tate this and that >Friends and cousins sharing andrew tate stuff >Nephews sharing andrew tate stuff >Coworker: you know andrew tate? Basicaly he's this guy that >Sick of all of it and decide to check him >Watch one video >He's like one of those 9 step program to being successful kind of guy while saying woman bad >Decide to check another video >Same s--- >Stop and go to sleep >Wake up check phone for news and youtube >Phone is now full of andrew tate suggestions, articles and youtube recommendations WHAT THE F--- I DON'T EVEN HATE OR LIKE THIS GUY I GET HOW HE GOT HIS AUDIENCE BUT WHAT THE F--- MY FEED IS NOW FULL OF THIS F------ GUY'S FACE AFTER JUST CHECKING ONE OR TWO VIDEOS ABOUT HIM I CAN'T EVEN F------ ESCAPE HIM IN REAL LIFE WHY ARE THEY SHILLING THIS F------ GUY ONTO PEOPLE SO MUCH??? HOW DO I RESET MY INTERNET FEED??

Pin

anon has a female coworker | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 42 KB PNG 07/10/22(Sun)10:59:36 No.881767997 >be me >have a female coworker >not attracted to her at all >find out we live in the same building >It's dark out, so I offer to walk home with her. She accepts >we go home after work a couple times, she did 90% of the talking and it was nice >again, still not interested in her >out of the blue, another coworker tells me that she's lesbian and taken >find out that said coworker told him to tell me >we never walk home again together I'm not mad at her, I'm just confused how she equated walking home together with romantic interest. I thought I was just being kind

Pin

Anon doesn't get the orange juice | /r/Greentext

1h (8/10 7:14). 69753665 11 Re. 0 Img JPG 49KB (432 × 435) : why do people do s--- like this? >be me yesterday >be in kitchen getting something to drink >roommate "is there still any orange juice?" >just saw it in the fridge so say yes >he doesn't say anything >i get tap water and leave >he gets mad at me "WHERE IS MY ORANGE JUICE?" >i'm confused, i tell him in the fridge >"WHY DIDN'T YOU GET ME A GLASS?" did this n----- really expect me to get him a glass from that question? tell me r9k, am i autistic or is he just retarded?

Pin

Know Your Meme

Like Page 1.8M likes