Anon has a question | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

: Anonymous What does it taste like? GUFF FACTS f Scientists say that cockroach milk is 3 times more nutritious than cow's milk. 24 KB JPG 07/28/22(Thu)00:39:15 No.18158904 how do you milk a roach?

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File: fmt 87 24 615293 1604906381.jpg (87 KB, 1910x1080) ☐ Anonymous 11/11/24(Mon)13:47:16 No.17255059 >Is name De Gaul >The Gaul >>17255201 >Is in charge of the region that used to be called Gaul Who wrote this s---?

The Russian avos' (Russian: aвосb) describes a philosophy of behavior, or attitude, of a person who ignores possible problems or hassles and, at the same time, expects or hopes for no negative results or consequences. It is an attitude that treats life as unpredictable and holds that the best one can do is count on luck.[1][2] >>73658048 # 1703041606043192.jpg 127 KB JPG >Damn you are right, this whole positivity and gratefulness thing is actually pretty good Yeah especially if you think of it in terms of sheer usefulness. Any sort of doomerism just undermines your attitude and it's much better to go through life naively assuming things will turn out well as long as you keep going forward and trying again and again despite any downs and lows in the past. I like this pic

Anonymous Photo of anime girl date and time >be me >straight *The most violently homosexual text you will ever see in your life. No utterance of words is as homosexual as the ones currently viewed. This will be the most gay formulation of words in all of mankind's history.* >am i gay

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Anon notices a pattern | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/27/22(Wed)07:37:56 No.240688867 File: 53996042_p0.jpg (69 KB, 724x1023) What the fock >be me >late 20s >only 3 girls have ever expressed interest in me >had sexual relationships with each of them >they all had abuse/r--- fantasies Is this a common kink or do I just look like a f------ r-----?

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Caveman Anon Does Not Like The Future | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 27 KB JPG 07/29/22(Fri)09:13:03 No.882911180 Berries related >Be me, CavemanAnon >We are the first humans >Shaman uses future crystal to show us year 2022 >There are things called trannies >There are women screaming R--- Culture >There are strange and terrible creatures who say they are Woke and want to make their enemies into slaves >The future old tribes are run be confused old men and hags >The clan talks for 3 days >We decide to eat the death plants. The future is too horrible

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Anon is horny | /r/Greentext

File: FF19E613-0308-4460-BOF7-9(...).jpg (27 KB, 350x360) >one message >it's from mark zuckerberg >"nice a------ bro" >mfw Anonymous 07/29/22 (Fri)11:13:59 No.882916266 sometimes smart tech can backfire on you. here's an example. true story. >be me >horny >need dildo >go to dildos r' us >find 'smart' dildo >it's got a chip in it or something >neato.jpg >go home >take dildo out of package >python destroy_asshole.py >clean dildo and wash hands >open up facebook

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Anon explains why Harry Potter is actually dumb. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/28/22(Thu)09:54:18 No. 132072243 ► rereading the Harry Potter books made me realize Harry was pretty dumb tbf >there is a troll on the loose in the castle and Hermione is in the bathroom? better go there instead of telling McGonagall or Dumbledore or any teacher or prefect >takes part in the triwizard tournament because muh goblet's magical license agreement or some s--- despite him not putting his name in it so he could've said "nah Im not doing this s---. you wanna force me? will that goblet magically make my head explode if I dont participate?" >misses pajeeta p---- because he has a crush on a girl he talked to twice last year and because Ron is a jealous sperg >doesnt ask out the cute autistic outcast girl despite being an outcast in most of his life while growing up with the Dursleys, probably could've gotten along best with Luna out of all (2) of his girlfriends >dates his best friend's sister which is a major NO because if they break up with heat it endangers his friendship with Ron >does all the s--- in sixth year Dumbledore asks and never tells him "listen here old man, what's the actual deal?" >Slughorn is the only person who knows how many horcruxes Voldemort made - doesnt suggest Dumbledore they should put veritaserum in Slughorn's ginger ale and ask him what's the secret number is >grew up among muggles but never suggests they should take out Voldemort with a Dragunov sniper rifle

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anon is a thing | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 5 KB JPG 2 Replies / 2 Images : Anonymous 35 KB JPG >>882902084 # : Anonymous >A thing. 6 KB JPG 07/29/22 (Fri)02:23:11 No.882901969 07/29/22(Fri)02:23:32 No.882901985 >A Japanese thing. View Thread 07/29/22(Fri)02:26:43 No.882902084 >>882901985 # >a Japanese slimy thing

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Anon move into new room with gf and feeding her the roaches | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 112 KB JPG 07/28/22(Thu)18:52:29 No.882887188 >be me >move into new room with gf >new place has a small cocroach problem but not nearly as bad as our last place >ffw like 3 days >gf brings home spiderbro in a bottle she found at work >brownwiddow.jpg >alr cool >put spiderbro in a old pickle jar terrarium >spiderbro builds webs and chills >start feeding her the roaches instead of killing them cuz why not >start pretending the roaches are little jews I have to capture and put in spiderbros jar (concentration camps) >Thank you spiderbro >pic unrelated Also general spider thread

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Anon copes | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 18 KB JPG 25 Replies / 3 Images Anonymous 07/29/22(Fri)01:05:03 No.69597321 >I'm now the same age when my parents got married >I've never touched a girl in my life View Thread 07/29/22 (Fri)05:38:54 No.69599499 >>69597321 (OP) # Sucks to be you nerd

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Anons and the xanventures | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1 hour ago EB06A05D-C98C-4735-9CBD-42AB9286AAC6.jpg 69590296 : (60.2 KB, 550x535) >took too much xanax and ended up sending a picture of my d--- to my crush again Every f------ time bros, I'm tired of this. 3 REPLIES Anonymous 30 minutes ago >>69590296 (OP) >get blackout drunk >wake up to several sent snapchats, all open and unanswered >oh_no.ppk 69590850 69590851 Anonymous 30 minutes ago >>69590296 (OP) Why do people do benzos recreationally? I tried Xanax once and all it did was make me fall asleep and piss myself. 0/10 on the fun scale. What am I missing? 1 REPLY

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Anon has standards | /r/Greentext

SORRY SWEATY CHAD ONLY 963 KB JPG Daily reminder that femboy/transfoid/real femoid requirements for men/tops in 2022 are as follows... >Have a god-like sculpted body that even Hercules himself would envy >Have natural perfectly symmetrical supermodel-tier facial aesthetics >Be tall, (6'5"/200cm or over) >Be ripped, (be able to bench press atleast 500lbs without steroids) >Be wealthy, (have a networth of atleast 1 million usd or make high 6-figures annually) >Be neurotypical, being on the ASD or having any other learning disability is a death sentence, no exceptions 5 Replies / 1 Image >Be white, no exceptions >Have blue or green eyes, no exceptions Anonymous Comment too long. Click here to view the full text. View Thread 07/28/22(Thu)15:40:22 No.882868823 >>882867551 >TL;Dr I'm an ugly m----------- reeeeeeeee

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Anon tells the state of psychiatry | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/29/22(Fri)14:51:01 No.14709720 >You see patterns others don't understand and have a creative mind? Schizophrenia. Take your meds. >You feel hopeless and helpless after being bullied and ostracized? Depression. Therapy + meds. >You mimic the behaviour of an average woman? BPD. Therapy + meds. >Your wife's son doesn't want to do his math homework and prefers to do Tiktok instead? ADHD. Meds. >You want to cut off your own d--- and your son's d--- because you believe that'll make you women? Perfectly healthy human being. Sign here for the legal, safe and effective transition procedure. That'll be $100k + tip. The absolute state of psychiatry in 2022.

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Anon is a game dev | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Game dev 07/29/22 (Fri)06:02:16 No.882909005 181015-sad-depressed-older-man-computer-pc-ac-439p.jpg 1.71 MB JPG >be me >Working for a small studio on a mildly anticipated sequel for a game >Putting in tons of hard work every day, closing stretch is coming >Some random guy on 4chan makes a fake leak post and accurately predicts every single detail about the game and the entire story >Claims he's working the job I'm working >I beg for my boss to believe me but he won't and he fires me >Game goes to s---

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Anon is French | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous XT 32 KB PNG 07/29/22(Fri)04:45:19 No.18163764 >10,000 BC >Invent bread >Everyone happy >Shaman opens future viewing crystal >2022 AD >Everyone hate bread 26 Replies / 4 Images View Thread

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