Anon time travels | /r/Greentext | Greentext Stories | Know Your Meme

Anonymous King 82 KB JPG 07/24/22(Sun)06:28:55 No.69532944 >thinking I'm gonna be some king or s--- because of my height > but everyone is real scared of me because I can't speak their Olde English >soldiers surround me with weapons drawn >be me >wake up one day in the middle ages >I'm 6 foot 4 so I'm a f------ giant to all these people >can't think of any thing so I dab and do some other fortnite dances >they start to laugh and take me to the king >basically a jester for a few weeks but running out of material 4 Replies >king gets bored of me and demotes me to wench even though I'm a dude >have to blow the king, prince and guards >life could be worse, I still get to sleep in the castle and free food Long live the king View Thread

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File: democratic party USA.png (47 KB, 1050x1024) For my r/greentext lurkers Anonymous (ID: S+5L+4sx 11/08/24(Fri)11:46:43 No.487728217 ► > base worldview on explictly hating men, white people, religious people, traditional people, conservative people, cisgender heterosexual people, rural people, etc > base worldview on telling blacks and immigrants that the only way they can hope to aspire to anything in life is by being uplifted by a white savior and their DEI programs > continuously alienate the above groups by dismissing all their concerns (caused by your direct insults and condemnations) as fascism, toxicity, fragility > continuously deny any outlet for dialogue/dissent on media/social media/campuses > continuously produce culture that alienates these groups further (like how in all modern remakes/reboots beloved male characters get blacked, gender swapped or turned into alcoholic p------) > alienate corporations by making them lose loads of money because you forced them under threat of cancellation to adopt your rhetoric > literally kill yourself when the above people vote against you I'm not even going to ask if they're retarded because I know the answer.

Anonymous 30 KB JPG Scrabble 11/07/24(Thu)22:49:06 No.927102124 >masculinity so fragile >Now let me call you a Nazi, some of the most deranged and brutal psychopaths to walk the earth >Demolished in a land slide election >Cries into phone for 30 min on social media using the most pedantic and esoteric psychobabble cooked up by a lobotomized ape having a epileptic fit during a game of WE ARE GOOD AND YOU NEED TO KNOW THIS, WHY DON'T YOU AGREE, NAZI

: Anonymous 84 KB JPG 04/16/22(Sat)20:52:07 No.876397732 Heard joke once >"Man goes to doctor. >Says he's an incel. >Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone, no gf. > Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. >Ryan Gosling is in town tonight. > Go and see him. >That should pick you up. >Man bursts into tears. >Says, But doctor... he's literally me"

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Mommy issues | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I HATE women SE 101 KB PNG 01/24/22(Mon)08:36:22 No.67128365 4 years ago my dad (DNA) tested me and my sister because he found out mom cheated on him. My dad was the most loving and perfect, i was his favorite, he always praised me and called me his pride. I was happy and i had a nice life. When the results came over it said that neither me or my sister were his biological kids. He left our home shortly after and i stopped seeing him for years. past september he came over to talk to my mom about legal issues he wants me and my sister to stop using his lastname, he even called me a "bastard" and "the son a w----" my loving dad told me those words because of what my mom did. She only laughed like a psyco. I f------ HATE women, yeah call me an incel f--- you, i hate women, i dont care about your opinion, my hatred is eternal. Women are monsters, f--- your feminism, stupid holes arent human

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Anon knows why tomboys are best. | /r/Greentext

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Anon is Russian | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: d16SR50L ) 26 KB JPG 2404 03/05/22(Sat)12:52:20 No.365357911 >be Russian >turn 18 >get conscripted into the Army >show up to your unit >get relentlessly bullied by every minority group >get r---- by your NCO >get sent into a warzone with zero training >drive into combat in an unarmored Ural truck >get shot in the face by a Ukrainian partisan after making it a km past the border >unit needs to take Kiev tomorrow, so no time to recover casualties >your body gets tossed to the side of the road >your body starts to rot and become a health hazard. local villagers bury you in a shallow grave >your body is never found and your mom spends the rest of her life wondering what became of you

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Anon wants to escape his life cycle | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: wCSQ6jvd 9PM 07/24/22(Sun)13:14:36 No.388094362 LIVING THE DREAM 4 P.M. 6P.M. 5PM. 11/ RAM 4A.M. (14) fqwdjf.jpg 56 KB JPG 7.PM. вам Unironically exactly this and I have no idea how to break out of the cycle.

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 4 KB JPG >let him >he blows me 07/23/22(Sat)20:59:20 No.882583514 >be me >me and my friend starts playing gay chicken when we drink >we lean towards each other to make out with eyes closed. First one to back off is the chicken >someone always end up losing for a year or so >after a few time we get confortable and we make out every once in a while as a joke >gets really drunk with him and he goes down to fake blow me >ain't no chicken >c--- on his face >feelsgood.jpeg >he tells me i'm a f-- for letting him blow me >confused Am i gay now?

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Anon takes the red pill | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/08/21(Sun)11:35:53 No.86 >get in >door closes >???????? >on a new floor do you guys really believe in this

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Anon becomes Hitler in his school | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: BZdSa8cx) [+] 01/10/18 (Wed)01:25:26 No.156180338 46 KB JPG >be in high school >civic mirror >if you don't know what that is, it's kinda like competitive sims between classmates where you have to bring your assigned political agenda to life >MFW I got fascist >prepare you collective anus, classmates >gather all the guys in the class and form one party, call it "Gucci Lane" >class is pretty even between males and females but the females split into two parties >everybody in our massive party votes for our party, I am prime minister >first order of business is to make a law that makes me the eternal leader >girls get p-----, try to appeal it in court >fail but it was close, time for a new law >make it so that females no longer have the right to appeal in court >maximum feminist anger >they recruit the gay kid to fight for them >his case was poorly put together and it was him vs my entire party >we won, but this rebellion shall not go unpunished >new law time >females no longer have the right to own property >females must pay a 75% income tax >females only allowed to use the market after all the males are done >criticisms of the Gucci lane party have a $1,000,000.00 fine >teacher wouldn't let us create laws against the gay kid, but whatever >MFW the females were incapable of achieving their objectives and all got s----- marks >I got a 96% >MFW I'm the public school equivalent of hitler

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Anon isa the pope | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/10/17(Fri) 18:51:56 No.71018690 >have a flag collection >always have different flags hanging 141 KB JPG >last week decided to have a theme of Christian countries >Had the USA, the Vatican, Poland, Brazil and Italy flags >older brother and his girlfriend come to visit >they get my room for some reason, I have to sleep in the bathtub >can hear them through the wall >they are laughing about my 'creepy flags' >they start having sex in my bed >feel angry about that >the wall I am on the other side of is the one with the Vatican flag >shout in a Italian accent >'THISA ISA THE POPE, STOPA HAVING A SEX' >they go silent >hear the door open >brother walks into the bathroom and punches me in the head then goes back >they keep having sex f------ normies

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anon goes to a festival | /r/Greentext

File: 4997_384133615015688_1695().jpg (77 KB, 960x640) Anonymous 07/24/22 (Sun)02:49:06 No.882582987 I found a backdoor hack to Grills >be me m21 >want female attention >be at cheap local musical festival, only 5€ entry >see a bunch of girls with free hugs signs >also se that alot of girls cant see s--- of whats going on the stage when in the crowd >revolutionaryidea.jpg >imkindastrongngl.wav >make myself a sign that says free piggybacks/riding on shoulders >walk through the crowd with my sign >immedeatly have people (only young, pretty festival girls) wanting my servics >every single one picks the shoulder riding option, since its simply the better choice >literally make like 9 girls happy with this >perfectwinwinwinsituation.docx >1: girls get to actually see the acts on stage instead of just a wall of people even if only for 3 mins max >2: I get a workout in >3: I get young, pretty festival girls thighs resting on my shoulders, my hands on their thighs and literally their p------ grinding on my neck >some dude tells me: yOuR'e JuSt HoRnY! D: >tell him: and even useful at the same time >copeharderloser.jar >girls thank me with hugs and even some with a kiss on the neck >sayonara virgins take the festival pill /b/ and do this. I swear on it.

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They don't know I took all the benadryl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Benadryl ALLERGY Diphenhydramine HCI 25mg | Antihistamine unty Nose Seeing Clichy, Watery Eyes ULTRATABS 24 TABLETS 98 KB JPG 11/05/21(Fri)18:56:46 No.66040279 Anyone here ever abused allergy medicine? >700 mg benadryl >pick up phone to play clash of clans >spend 30 minutes on my village >phone vanishes >phone was upstairs the whole time >feel like utter shet for a week afterwards

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anon is a menace to his cheating ex | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/11/22(Mon)15:59:57 No.881827973 78 KB JPG Am I legally doing anything wrong? > Caught my ex cheating 6 years ago > Broke up on the spot > All her socials are public > Been looking up her new boyfriends (11) since me > Messaged all of them > Showed them screenshots and audio tapes of her confessions > They all broke up with her FFW to Yesterday > Number 11 just showed her the door > She calls me > Tells me to stop stalking her and ruining her life > Tell her that she brought that upon herself > Says she will call the cops if I do this one more time > Tell her she needs a priest rather than a lawyer at this point I feel like I'm doing God's work here. Should I continue doing this? Even if she goes private, she doesn't know I still have 3 mutual contacts that could snitch her new boyfriend's identity to me. She literally can't win. It's not illegal to know who is dating who and to send someone a message. It's not like I'm messaging her, I'm messaging her new boyfriends. I wanna patrol this w---- until either of us is in the casket. I just wanna know how legal it is to do that.

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anon is a god fearin’ citizen | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 587 KB PNG 11 Replies / 2 Images : Anonymous >>13689353 # Yes. : Anonymous KILL YOURSELF F----- 2.79 MB GIF 07/23/22(Sat) 15:08:27 No.13689234 >The Bible said it >I believe it >That settles it Anonymous >>13689410 # Yes. 07/23/22(Sat)15:39:55 No.13689395 like the memes on 4chan, right? View Thread 07/23/22(Sat)15:44:12 No.13689410 >>13689445 # >>13689465 # >I base my entire life around a book written by Bronze Age Jews >I never question anything I've been told >this makes me a cool alpha Chad 07/23/22(Sat)15:49:46 No.13689445

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